The Kalwejt Foundation for the Promotion of Atlas Hilarity

[Technocracy Timmy]

Topic: US Church Membership Drops Below 50% for the First Time

Not surprising that the trend really accelerated only in 2005, the same year Reddit.com was launched.

[Diabolical Materialism]

PAGE 10! GIVE IT UP FOR PAGE 10 OF THE KRISTI NOEM / LIL NAS X THREAD!!

[Pheurton Skeurto]

At least make your April Fools threads somewhat believable. Like the Christy Smith one; that thread was very well done.

[S019]

It's mathematically impossible. My infallible Flormula, as follows, shows:

R_Marg = (D_Gen + R_Gen)/FL_Elect ≈ 0.01263947

R_Marg = (D_Gen + R_Rubio)/FL_Elect ≈ 20.82954631

R_Marg = ((D_Sanders + R_Gen)/FL_Elect) × SOCIAL_ομγ ≈ 35.91765278

R_Marg = ((D_Sanders + R_Rubio)/FL_Elect) × SOCIAL_ομγ = ∞

Therefore, the Florida theorem rules out the possibility of a Democratic victory.

[Anzeigenhauptmeister]

Virginia will vote for a liberal Democrat for president when hell freezes over.

[brucejoel99]

Virginia will vote for a liberal Democrat for president when hell freezes over.

Exquisitely well-aged content.

[True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자)]

Virginia will vote for a liberal Democrat for president when hell freezes over.

Exquisitely well-aged content.

Technically you could argue that none of the Democratic nominees since then have been liberal.  Certainly lots of Democrats would argue that.

[Alcibiades]

Virginia will vote for a liberal Democrat for president when hell freezes over.

Exquisitely well-aged content.

Technically you could argue that none of the Democratic nominees since then have been liberal.  Certainly lots of Democrats would argue that.

I’m pretty sure that that poster would have considered Obama, HRC and Biden liberals. He probably had more of a Jim Webb-type in mind.

[Unconditional Surrender Truman]

Virginia will vote for a liberal Democrat for president when hell freezes over.

Exquisitely well-aged content.

Has anyone actually been to Hell to see if this prediction came true? Maybe jravnsborg can report back to us in a few years.

[GeorgiaModerate]

Virginia will vote for a liberal Democrat for president when hell freezes over.

Exquisitely well-aged content.

Has anyone actually been to Hell to see if this prediction came true? Maybe jravnsborg can report back to us in a few years.

Hell, Norway, and Hell, Michigan, frequently freeze over in the winter.

[DINGO Joe]

Virginia will vote for a liberal Democrat for president when hell freezes over.

Exquisitely well-aged content.

Has anyone actually been to Hell to see if this prediction came true? Maybe jravnsborg can report back to us in a few years.

Hell, Norway, and Hell, Michigan, frequently freeze over in the winter.

Well, if you need anymore evidence, Texas froze over this year.  Looking good for Ds!

[John Dule]

Pure comedy, though sadly a little too obvious.

Very wrong, I am on record of condemning this abominable practice.

[Donerail]

We know what the vote will be. It’s a foregone conclusion. Roberts will even fail to convince Kavanaugh.

I'm impressed by your skill in clairvoyance.

I have that skill.

[Battista Minola 1616]

Not sure if this was intentionally hilarious but I loved it:

Sidenote: I find my region's record on this absolutely impressive by the way given it is one of the poorest in the country! CC may have been a bunch of corrupt f*** who kept the region dead last on every metric from education and healthcare to unemployment and GDP/capita and inequality, but they have a surprisingly magnificent record on keeping a balanced budget! Truly impressive stuff so credit where credit is due

[Former President tack50]

Not sure if this was intentionally hilarious but I loved it:

Sidenote: I find my region's record on this absolutely impressive by the way given it is one of the poorest in the country! CC may have been a bunch of corrupt f*** who kept the region dead last on every metric from education and healthcare to unemployment and GDP/capita and inequality, but they have a surprisingly magnificent record on keeping a balanced budget! Truly impressive stuff so credit where credit is due

Worst part is that I was being unironic there! Having a balanced budget, while you also embezzle and steal good chunks of the regional budget is truly impressive stuff!

Of course it comes at the cost of being last in every meaningful performance metric; or sometimes 2nd to last, thank God for Mississippi Extremadura

The budget back in the 2010s probably must have looked something like:

49% Embezzled money Totally real contracts with very real and reputable companies
49% Debt repayments
2% Literally everything else

[Battista Minola 1616]

Not sure if this was intentionally hilarious but I loved it:

Sidenote: I find my region's record on this absolutely impressive by the way given it is one of the poorest in the country! CC may have been a bunch of corrupt f*** who kept the region dead last on every metric from education and healthcare to unemployment and GDP/capita and inequality, but they have a surprisingly magnificent record on keeping a balanced budget! Truly impressive stuff so credit where credit is due

Worst part is that I was being unironic there! Having a balanced budget, while you also embezzle and steal good chunks of the regional budget is truly impressive stuff!

Of course it comes at the cost of being last in every meaningful performance metric; or sometimes 2nd to last, thank God for Mississippi Extremadura

The budget back in the 2010s probably must have looked something like:

49% Embezzled money Totally real contracts with very real and reputable companies
49% Debt repayments
2% Literally everything else

Wow. Your place sounds delightful, lol.

I do wonder, is Extremadura also very corrupt, and is the Canary problem specific to Coalición Canaria rule or something more or less endemic to the islands?

[Badger]

Credit where credit is due.

I’m a vet.  You owe this to me.

Insert generic triggered Crane response here

[S019]

Obviously the other twelve-year-olds need armed in school, so that a good twelve-year-old with a gun can stop a bad 12 year old with a gun.

Was undecided as to whether to put it the burns thread or here, I think it fit in both, so I flipped a coin.

[Roll Roons]

He is well known, telegenic.


He can appeal to Trump/Espy voters.........

Nailed the posting style.

[S019]

Here are the templates for reactions to the results:

“Massive (over/under)performance for the (GOP/Democrats)! This proves 2022 will be a (Republican tsunami/2002 redux)!”

“It’s just one special election, we can’t jump to conclusions about 2022 being a (Republican tsunami/2002 redux) based on this election alone. Besides, don’t forget about the (TX-06/WI-Superintendent) results!”

[Continential]

I mean, his work is considered the culmination of Renaissance polyphony, so he does deserve some kudos.

[lfromnj]

We had Republicans attempt to establish what was essentially a white supremacist caucus in the House, so I do not want to hear any "But if Republicans did" arguments.

Anyone with a mind knows that Black and Latino citizens have a very specific issue set that require focused attention. Speaking to Black and Brown journalists exclusively is not racist, it is helping to close a long term gap of minority issues not being heard.

Imagine if Trump had declared that only white journalists could ask him questions.

Why would you care? Aren't you a Sanders supporter?

Personally, I wish there was a way to silence all non white Atlas posters. I hear enough from white people as is in life and think it's ridiculous that even online, I have to hear from white voices and their opinions. This site would be better if we could make it purely a vehicle for non white voices like lfromnj, Deadprez, OSR, etc.

Hyperbole much?

What's hyperbole? That historically white voices have been magnified and that the effect continues even on online forums? Just because white voices are calling for equality doesn't take away from the fact that they are the primary voices we are forced to hear from. It's genuinely quite unsettling and tragic that more diverse voices don't have free spaces to speak and white voices have to listen while the reverse has been true for hundreds of years. The best way would be to have white Atlas users not allowed to post but allowed to react and recommend posts so we understand that they are indeed listening to non white voices.

[Anti-Bothsidesism]

I wish I was as smart as she thinks she is.

[💥💥 brandon bro (he/him/his)]

context

Unfortunately, I never got the chance to study the bronz age in school.

Gosh darn those Sea People...they ruined the bronze age! And they did it by spamming threads about why people in Ugarit liked cops...

Will the Hittites' reliance on chariots doom the Indo-Europeanist movement? Many people are saying this.

[Bleach Blonde Bad Built Butch Bodies for Biden]

My son looks exactly like me. So...

That's odd mine looks exactly like the mailman!!!