Comedy Goldmine & Robin

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

Regarding Bushie's Update Thread:

I touched myself to the last 3 pages, it was that good.

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

I don't post here for hours while drinking or anything. You people have never came home from a night out and fired up the old Atlas Forum for a little while?

I usually just sleep with my wife.

You need to be drunk to man up to that task, or what?

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

Posting it twice won't make it any funnier.

Cut our lil boy a break, Joe.......he probably had a tough weekend.

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

Posting it twice won't make it any funnier.

Oops!  I didn't see that already.

Well, here's another one...

Please lets not do that -

Thanks,
Dave

WTF, Inksie?

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=123351.msg2655488#msg2655488

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

On the thread entitled "Larry Summers out"

Never had him down as a homosexual, but there you are.

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

As to who is the biggest moderate hero  here:

Other - jmfcst

In Lynchnegro TX, perhaps, but thankfully not the real world.

I almost spit out some of my sandwich, you prick!  

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

DeMint said if someone is openly homosexual, they shouldn't be teaching in the classroom and he holds the same position on an unmarried woman who's sleeping with her boyfriend — she shouldn't be in the classroom.

“(When I said those things,) no one came to my defense,” he said. “But everyone would come to me and whisper that I shouldn't back down. They don't want government purging their rights and their freedom to religion.”

Wow, I knew he had developed a reputation as an "anti-Pork" zealot, but I guess I thought the phrase meant something else entirely.

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

I'm down to 3 full days left of freedom!!  As of 3:00, I'm sitting at 89 hours left.  I did time the drive this morning and leaving at 6:45, it took me 35 minutes to get there.  I got to the parking lot at 7:20.  So, that tells me since I want to be there at 7:30 each morning, to leave at 6:45 each morning and have those 10 "flex" minutes.  Really, I will have 40 cushion minutes up until 8:00, so I'll be just fine with the drive.  The traffic was getting heavy, but it wasn't all that bad.  Much better than it would have been a half hour to an hour later.

Traffic was getting heavy? I guess all 7 cars in the state go out early.

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

Haha, Beet.  I haven't voted yet, but I'm leaning towards "if I were drunk."  But it would have to be that sort of special drunk wherein I'd had a dose or two of Cialis beforehand, or otherwise predisposed to cranky, older women, and hadn't masturbated earlier that day, and mainly it was a clean vodka drunk, and not a red wine drunk.  Now, remember Beet, we're talking about Bachmann at this point, and not O'Donnell.  If you put out that joint and read the thread title again, I'll put down my glass of vodka and decide whether I want to vote in this poll.

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

This one is pretty old, but I came across it and I just died laughing, I F***ING DIED.

I'll also add that it was probably the worst photoshop job I've ever seen.  His manhood was unfeasibly large and way too veiny.  How in the heck would gay guys (and straight girls) find that attractive?  What the hell would they do with one of those if they ever encountered it?  I doubt there's an orifice in the whole world large enough to handle it.

This guy certainly changed my opinion of Harrison Ford, let me tell you.  I always respected him as an actor until now.

And of course Spade's comment further down that page was s.o.p.   

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

Dave should post more.

He did:

... the whining ... never ... ends ...

The abuse of moderating powers is what never ends with you.

I fully support Joe's deletion of your post for excessive hyperbole that calls the democratic party leaders "fascist extremists".

Thanks,
Dave

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

Are these Dave's first two appearances in a Comedy Goldmine?

No, we're just shocked at his appearances on the Atlas......no matter what he said it's gold.

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

jmfcst and CARL HAYDEN have been eliminated.

I was thrown out with someone who is completely monotone?!  It's like throwing out a Stradivarius banjo along with a $5 Casio keyboard

Corrected.

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

The thread "Opinion of Justin Bieber"

I wonder what he'll sound like when his nuts drop?

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

Is Winfield a Vander Blubb sock?

Noooooooooooo.......Blubb has brains and a good sense of humor.

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

You do realize I worked for BJ Services

Love it.

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

Hi Jeff,

Merry Christmas!  How are your sales?  You have a large territory and I'm counting on ya!

Your Boss

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

Yates, I hope you get cancer and die.

Thank you, Sam.  I have reported this post and ask that you kindly refrain from contacting me or directing comments towards me again.

You think this is over, f****t?

Agreeing with Spade this early in the year is unsettling.......but oh well. 

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

On Lindsey Graham's presidential prospects:

Not a chance. It doesn't help that when you type his name in the google search bar, "lindsey graham gay" is the first suggestion, and "lindsey graham outed" is the second.

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

Saorsa doesn't need to worry as his partner isn't affected by age of consent laws.

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

Good Lord, I must be extremely tired or something.  I just had another one of those instantaneous cry fests this early morning.  I was just fine on the way home from work, excited and joyful and jubilant that today is my last day of classroom training, but then I read something on my facebook and I just absolutely lost it for about 5 minutes.  I'll admit it was a pretty selfish reason, too.

What it was is my birthday is 5 days after my grandmother's.  She will be 85 on Easter Sunday (April 24) this year and I will be 29 on April 29.  I just found out that every single one of the out-of-town family members will leave before my birthday leaving me really no one to celebrate with except the usual Mom, Dad, and Grandma.  I started throwing a little "pity party" complaining that my birthday is always overshadowed by hers, which is the truth, but still why would I cry over something like that?  That is such a selfish pity party.

I wish that was funny, E.  It's just fucking pathetic.

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=132368.0

I knew it was your board the minute he posted it......kudos!

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

Brilliant!

Sex.

Habitual smoking, of course.

And

(Grey Goose)

Since when do you have 3 hands?

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

Mean, but funny.

I suppose for a fat virgin, a good BM is about as close to 'god' as he's going to get.

It was a fine one, but perhaps not worth the death-points I'll no doubt get for it.

As it turned out I did get death-points (2) for this one ^^^^^^^^^^^^^

That was worth it though........classic.

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

How would Canada have a larger penis size than the US? All their immigrants come from the "red" areas whereas the US is like 30% Black/Hispanic.