Comedy Goldmine Rises

[Badger]

In Pennsylvania, by registration, 51% of voters are Democrats, but in any election, only about 42-44% of the voters are.

It's not a fast growing state in population, nor are there massive new sources of young people here.

Pennsylvanians did have babies between 1990 and 1994,

How do Pennsylvanians have babies?

The ruffed grouse brings them to couples.

Probably only funny to Pennsylvanians. who are all taught in elementary school the Ruffled Grouse is the state bird.

[Filuwaúrdjan]

That depends on what you mean by worthy, doesn't it? The fact that Rajiv did fine suggests to me that the only thing that makes a good Prime Minister is the lack of active malice (which Sanjay had in plenty, of course).

[opebo]

Is Torie a eunuch?

He's an American, so presumably yes.

[Bacon King]

What is the Michigan Citizens Redistricting Competition?  Regardless, nicely done.

My guess is that it's a competition where Michigan citizens redistrict Michigan.

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

If Romney is not the nominee in 2012, no, he will not run in 2016.

He will become the new head of the IMF.

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

Carville talks a lot and no one is ever quite sure what he is saying.  That's a combination we like in our talking heads and their guests.

I'd like to see Sylvester Stallone interviewing James Carville:

Err mmm.  MMM u u u, duun.  Hunh heyv hunh mmr.

Oh, You cain't swang a dead cat 'thout hittin one of those.  I thank that's about the ugliest thang I seen.   Y'all remember that?

Emmm.  hlll  yuus.  Huu mmr diin.  S'uy memmmbmah?

Hell yeah!  That was great.  Y'all need ta git that on tape.  His'un was about as happy as a fat kid with a cupcake till they learnt the mike was on.  Then he was redder'n a fox's ass during polk sally season. 

MMM.  Nav' em kyillden bayy. Heep?

Naw.  I'd piss on a spark plug if I thought it would do any good, but he ain't nuthin' but a blowhard.  Gittin real information outta him is about as easy as sandpapering a Tiger's ass in a phonebooth. 

RR.  Rmmn.  huud rruful.

Yep.  That's about the way I sees it too, sly.  Anyhow, I'd rather be a fly on the wall than a n at a Klan rally.  Shit, that reminds me.  I got a meetin' ta go to.  Catch y'all later. 

[Filuwaúrdjan]

Haha, I was about to post that here as well. Brilliant stuff.

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

Haha, I was about to post that here as well. Brilliant stuff.

I seriously want to drink with angus someday.....big time.

[I spent the winter writing songs about getting better]

Don't you have to be able to read before you can write a book?

[King]

Leave God alone out of that!

[Lief 🗽]

This guy is one of my favorites at this point:

J.J., obsessing over the Rasmussen Obama approval ratings will not help you with the ladies. You do want the ladies, do you not?

If I wanted help with the "ladies" I wouldn't be posting here (though I am the only poster that ever corresponded with Deborah Palfrey).

Actually, the Rasmussen numbers have tended to be better than Gallup in election years and tend to be much more stable than Gallup.

You "corresponded" with Deborah Palfrey? My students buy hookers all the time. I don't give them extra credit for that though. Unfortunately, I can't give you extra credit. But I can give you advice since I am in a position of authority. My advice is this - spending the day mashing the F5 button on rasmussenreports.com waiting for Obama's approval to change by a point or two is no way to get the ladies.

[I spent the winter writing songs about getting better]

Pretty funny but I'm perplexed as to why J. J. even brought up Deborah Palfrey.

[King]

Pretty funny but I'm perplexed as to why J. J. even brought up Deborah Palfrey.

J.J. is a politician.  To him, there is no better way to get the ladies than through a madam.

Also, I think we should add counter-balancing extra credit points to the infraction system and then make The Professor the sole moderator who can give them.

[#CriminalizeSobriety]

Seme:
1. Paul
2. Roemer
3. Moore

Uke:
1. Gingrich
2. Romney
3. Huntsman

[J. J.]

Pretty funny but I'm perplexed as to why J. J. even brought up Deborah Palfrey.

J.J. is a politician.  To him, there is no better way to get the ladies than through a madam.

Also, I think we should add counter-balancing extra credit points to the infraction system and then make The Professor the sole moderator who can give them.

Ex politician.  But, if I was really interested in getting a woman, I obviously have contacts.    Opeboesque contacts.

Of course, anyone interested in women is wasting their time on this site (with the male/female ratio).

[King]

Pretty funny but I'm perplexed as to why J. J. even brought up Deborah Palfrey.

J.J. is a politician.  To him, there is no better way to get the ladies than through a madam.

Also, I think we should add counter-balancing extra credit points to the infraction system and then make The Professor the sole moderator who can give them.

Ex politician.  But, if I was really interested in getting a woman, I obviously have contacts.    Opeboesque contacts.

Of course, anyone interested in women is wasting their time on this site (with the male/female ratio).

Of course, the only way for someone like J.J. to get a woman, if interested, is by contacting friends of a dead prostitute.

[Landslide Lyndon]

[Congratulations to Phil]

[King]

A lefty makes a stupid comment, normal.
A righty makes a stupid comment in reply, normal.
Various stooges on the left make fun of righty and ignore the original stupid comment, normal.
BRTD steps in and is the voice of reason?  Color me shocked.

[Badger]

From the "jmfcst Death Pool" thread:

I hope he's muted and unmuted exactly three days later. Then he posts here for 40 days and leaves the forum forever.

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

By the way, whose sock are you?

I don't know about The Professor, but Kalwejt is like Towelie--a sock off the original owner's foot that somehow gained consciousness.

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

With all due respect to the Professor, shouldn't the actual girls on the forum be asked this question?

Being a girl won't help you with girls.

Actually it will, if you come here:

[Landslide Lyndon]

Santorum is for hard-working Americans who aren't afraid to get their hands dirty.

No, he is for the people who never fear having to do any work that poses either a threat of injury or muscle pain.

Well, considering the fact that you never work your brain - meaning no threat to injure it - we'll be sure to get you a Santorum 2012 bumper sticker right away.

He can stick it on his rear bumper, I presume?

[Filuwaúrdjan]

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=137189.0

[King]

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=137189.0

Wow.  Looks like something out of Yahoo Answers.

[Filuwaúrdjan]

I know; amazing isn't it? It ought to become an official Forum Legend.

if Mitt wins the presidency I don't know how we're going to endure the strokefest that will ensue, though on one level I feel happy for him.  it'd be kind of like me getting to see the Mets win the World Series.