I pretended to have autism once in order to avoid suspension from my school after starting a fire in the science lab, does that count?
Not far off how it went actually.
Something like this, with the headteacher bellowing and me speaking quietly and slowly, the "conversation" going around and around in circles until this point:
Head: "Why did you start a fire?"
Me:
"I don't know."Head: "Why did you start the fire?"
Me:
"Because it seemed funny at the time."Head: "Do you think people being injured is funny?"
Me:
"Uh...no..."Head: "Why did you start the fire?"
Me:
"Because I'm autistic."<Silence, cut to later in the week>
Head: "I looked up the symptoms of autism and I don't think you need to worry about being autistic."
Me:
"Oh."Instead of being suspended (bearing in mind this was just one incident in that crazy year, including throwing tools out of a third floor window and climbing on a roof), I was put onto some kind of system whereby each period a teacher would have to sign-off that I had behaved myself. My parents spent nearly as much time at school as I did that year. I can't entirely explain why I acted out so much that year but it was probably a combination of boredom and showing off. In hindsight I was a massive bellend and the school was very patient with me.
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