Update for Everyone VII: Insert Something Philosophical Sounding Here

[JA]

My girlfriend and I are going to the Twenty One Pilots concert here in KC on the 21st. I like the band, but she absolutely loves them and they mean so much to her since they helped her as she struggled with depression, suicide, and self-harm. But, I have a big surprise planned for her during her favorite song, which they play at the end of every concert; I'm going to propose to her. I'm so excited and nervous!

[JA]

My depression has surged back into prominence yet again lately. Nihilistic thoughts haunt my daily existence. I left my home, everything and everyone that I ever knew, for promise of better opportunities and nothing good has come to fruition. It has for others in my family that moved, yet no matter what I do it just seems to escape me. Nearly 6 months later and, overall, I’m no better off than I was back in Florida; I’m still stuck at a crap job that makes my degree worthless, I make well below a living wage, and have applied to over 500 jobs online at this point and not a single positive result. I’ve changed my resume numerous times, had it reviewed by “professionals,” targeted jobs I figured I’d get, and yet... nothing. 10,000+ jobs available in the area, but none willing to hire me, except the jobs any person off the street could get.

I have bills to pay, a disabled girlfriend with no health insurance, $30,000+ in student loans, and a growing issue with alcohol. I just want to believe something good is coming, but I’m honestly losing faith and my mind is growing darker every day. I just want to give up so badly, but I have someone counting on me, so I can’t. But, damn it’s hard...

[JA]

Stomach viruses are so awful. My symptoms have been brutal; up all night doing you can imagine simultaneously from 7pm-4am. My lower back (presumably kidneys) have been killing me, got a 101F fever, and my eyes are burning while also having an awful headache. Definitely not enjoying my weekend.

[JA]

There’s this old dude in the break room at work asking Siri to look up stuff about Monika Lewinsky and the Clintons. He’s always watching something or saying something about Hillary Clinton. He really dislikes her, yet he’s so obsessed with her. It’s weird af

[JA]

There’s an old guy at my work who literally listens to some country music song about Hillary Clinton being a liar, should be in jail, etc... on like full blast in the break room even with a bunch of people in there. I’ve heard him talking to Siri, asking about Hillary Clinton a couple times before as well. Literally every single time I’m in the break room with him (basically every day), he’s preoccupied with Hillary Clinton. What the hell is wrong with some people? It was 2 years ago, leave it the hell alone.

[JA]

So I met a girl at an Indian wedding that I really fancied, and we basically spent the whole of the second night just talking to each other. Obviously I did nothing; and it doesn't really matter because she lives in Abu Dhabi and I'll never see her again. But you'd figure it should be pretty obvious when to make a move right? [/rant]

Not if you’re an incel.

[JA]

There’s an old guy at my work who literally listens to some country music song about Hillary Clinton being a liar, should be in jail, etc... on like full blast in the break room even with a bunch of people in there. I’ve heard him talking to Siri, asking about Hillary Clinton a couple times before as well. Literally every single time I’m in the break room with him (basically every day), he’s preoccupied with Hillary Clinton. What the hell is wrong with some people? It was 2 years ago, leave it the hell alone.

Go in there and blast some salvos back of "fight song", if he is obsessed with HRC as much as you claim, he'll recognize it immediately.

I found the song he plays constantly: https://youtu.be/U8m5gxCiOYk

[JA]

So, the gossip today from the crazy Clinton obsessed guy at my work in the employee lounge is that:

Michele Obama went to a doctor and it’s proven she’s a man. The Obama’s are going to be giving their children back to the real parents soon.
Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama are being investigated for treason against America.
Chelsea Clinton is not Bill’s legitimate daughter; Hillary committed adultery and she’s the child of another man.

[JA]

More interesting hot takes from the crazy old guy at work...

An undocumented Mexican immigrant killed an American boy with his car before Christmas, that’s why we need the wall.

Trump is going to declare a national emergency for the wall’s money and martial law so that he’ll have the power to fire anyone he wants, so all of the Democrats will be fired. It’ll finally clear out the government of the trash so Trump can do what he promised but couldn’t because of Democrats.

All football players who kneel during the national anthem are disrespecting the flag, so they all must be fired. Trump needs to make sure they’re fired.

Apparently he fought in Vietnam for America’s freedom and the Democrats are taking our freedoms away. So, Trump needs to declare martial law and throw out the Democrats.

[JA]

More interesting hot takes from the crazy old guy at work...

Dish dish dish!

An undocumented Mexican immigrant killed an American boy with his car before Christmas, that’s why we need the wall.

I know an undocumented Mexican illegal immigrant killed a cop. Didn't hear about the boy. But yeah, build that wall!

Trump is going to declare a national emergency for the wall’s money and martial law so that he’ll have the power to fire anyone he wants, so all of the Democrats will be fired. It’ll finally clear out the government of the trash so Trump can do what he promised but couldn’t because of Democrats.

Can he please fire Nancy Pelosi?

All football players who kneel during the national anthem are disrespecting the flag, so they all must be fired. Trump needs to make sure they’re fired.

Was he wearing a "Big Govt Sucks!" t-shirt? You should get him one. He'd like it.

Apparently he fought in Vietnam for America’s freedom and the Democrats are taking our freedoms away. So, Trump needs to declare martial law and throw out the Democrats.

I'm sold. This (presumably elderly) gentleman sounds like a TRUH patriot. Tell him to not use all the Tiki oil up in one night thought, fascising gets expensive.

I have no doubt at all that he’d love a shirt like that lol.

Overall, he’s a nice guy. He says good morning to everyone, gets along with the Black folks and immigrants (and even tries to talk politics with them smh), and is just a friendly person, despite his... eccentricities. He particularly likes stopping and talking to me and asking me to help him with some of his work; I always help him too. Imagine his surprise if he discovered my views

[JA]

Tonight, I've finally been able to accept and admit to myself what I've somewhat known for a while and have been told that I have by those living with this condition and those educated on it. I have PTSD. It's gotten better over time, but it hasn't gone away. All that has really happened is that I've been pretty well removed from my worst "triggers" and able to exist without too much intense stress. Now that I've gotten a new job, one that's in retail, fast-paced, and heavily customer service oriented, I've noticed my old symptoms reappearing and making life very difficult for me.

I have constant brain fog, which is sometimes so bad that it completely ruins my short term memory. For example, two days ago I was labeling documents for a customer, turned my focus to something else for a moment, then returned and asked them who labeled that document. They looked at me with shock and said, "you just did that." Things like that are common for me at work now. My hearing is also awful when I'm like that, I can hardly retain any information, I constantly catch myself holding my breath, and I feel like I'm on some kind of autopilot that I'm not controlling when it gets particularly bad (like when a customer is being awful, especially yelling, which is a major trigger for me).

I hate that my mind's like this and I know that I need counseling and medication, which I'll hopefully be able to receive now that I finally have insurance (despite me fighting having to go to a doctor - especially a counselor). It kind of feels good to accept it and my experiences over the years make more sense in light of this revelation. But, where to go from here, especially with the limitations it places on me (even if only temporarily)...

[JA]

Tonight, I've finally been able to accept and admit to myself what I've somewhat known for a while and have been told that I have by those living with this condition and those educated on it. I have PTSD. It's gotten better over time, but it hasn't gone away. All that has really happened is that I've been pretty well removed from my worst "triggers" and able to exist without too much intense stress. Now that I've gotten a new job, one that's in retail, fast-paced, and heavily customer service oriented, I've noticed my old symptoms reappearing and making life very difficult for me.

I have constant brain fog, which is sometimes so bad that it completely ruins my short term memory. For example, two days ago I was labeling documents for a customer, turned my focus to something else for a moment, then returned and asked them who labeled that document. They looked at me with shock and said, "you just did that." Things like that are common for me at work now. My hearing is also awful when I'm like that, I can hardly retain any information, I constantly catch myself holding my breath, and I feel like I'm on some kind of autopilot that I'm not controlling when it gets particularly bad (like when a customer is being awful, especially yelling, which is a major trigger for me).

I hate that my mind's like this and I know that I need counseling and medication, which I'll hopefully be able to receive now that I finally have insurance (despite me fighting having to go to a doctor - especially a counselor). It kind of feels good to accept it and my experiences over the years make more sense in light of this revelation. But, where to go from here, especially with the limitations it places on me (even if only temporarily)...

Are you a combat vet or something?

No. PTSD is most commonly associated with combat veterans, but it can occur from any single or series of traumatic events and how your mind reacts to it. For me, it stems from having an abusive, alcoholic father. But, I imagine the constant instability and poverty; a chronically depressed and borderline suicidal mother; and, presumably, a weaker ability to handle the stress of that situation than many others might have contributed to that as well.

[JA]

As I mentioned in the relapse thread, all the progress I reported about my brother proved to be shattered within a few hours of posting it.

The addiction your brother is fighting is an uniquely awful one. Not many people who become addicted are able to kick the addiction - even with serious intervention. I just hope that, in time? Your brother finds some method of kicking his addiction that works for him. I can sympathize with how difficult your situation is, as his brother - but don’t ever lose hope. Anything can happen, my friend.

[JA]

I've decided to begin learning computer coding and programming via online sources. My BA in Sociology simply isn't amounting to much career-wise. Although I've landed a job that, when I take and (hopefully) pass my national exam, will increase my pay to $16.30/hr, that's certainly not enough to make for a comfortable life or pay off my student loans. Not to mention that I don't want to do this particular job forever.

So, I want to open new opportunities for myself by learning web design. I know it'll take a while to learn, but I'm determined to do so. Establishing a career in the field will be a bit more difficult without a degree in a STEM field, but from what I've read, it's certainly not impossible.

Does anyone have any helpful advice?

[JA]

I've decided to begin learning computer coding and programming via online sources. My BA in Sociology simply isn't amounting to much career-wise. Although I've landed a job that, when I take and (hopefully) pass my national exam, will increase my pay to $16.30/hr, that's certainly not enough to make for a comfortable life or pay off my student loans. Not to mention that I don't want to do this particular job forever.

So, I want to open new opportunities for myself by learning web design. I know it'll take a while to learn, but I'm determined to do so. Establishing a career in the field will be a bit more difficult without a degree in a STEM field, but from what I've read, it's certainly not impossible.

Does anyone have any helpful advice?

Get a bachelor's in something more useful, and work your @$$ off in high school to get a good scholarship so you won't have to worry about crippling student debt. Starting this fall semester, my cost of attendance is literally going to be like 3k a semester. I'll have so little student debt if I graduate.

Good for you for doing things in a smart way at your age, but I’m 24. I already have a Bachelor’s degree in Sociology. The advice I’m seeking is from people with some knowledge regarding how to enter into the fields of programming/web design and any recommendations they may have to help me towards my goals.

[JA]

I've decided to begin learning computer coding

I see you have moved on since your job at the Weekly Standard ended.

Indeed. My master plan is to design a cuck-porn website that’s actually a front for funneling chud money into the Sanders, Carter, AOC, and Omar campaigns - and, of course, my own pocket as well.

[JA]

I've decided to begin learning computer coding and programming via online sources. My BA in Sociology simply isn't amounting to much career-wise. Although I've landed a job that, when I take and (hopefully) pass my national exam, will increase my pay to $16.30/hr, that's certainly not enough to make for a comfortable life or pay off my student loans. Not to mention that I don't want to do this particular job forever.

Feel ya there, brother. Hoping to upgrade jobs soon and, if not, I may sell out to a fellowship at a low ranked local school.

You always have to be moving up in life. I never would’ve considered tech just a couple years ago, yet here I am, beginning my journey of learning all this stuff so I can (hopefully) land a decent job in the field.

I hope things work out well for you and that you don’t have to settle.

[JA]

After making a joke of something as serious as suicide on this forum, which was rightfully called out by others, I’ve realized what an awful, nihilistic, downward spiral I’ve let myself fall into after shifting my time and attention towards Reddit. It’s really such a toxic gathering place - especially the political subreddits that are heavily oriented towards memes. Whether it’s leftwing or rightwing, they’re both harmful to a person’s mental health and perspective.

So, I’ve decided to back away from that stuff.

[JA]

I don't think I can self-identify as a Socialist/Marxist anymore. This has been a long time coming and is a result of numerous complex factors, but I can finally accept and publicly acknowledge this important change. Now, where to go from here...

[JA]

I don't think I can self-identify as a Socialist/Marxist anymore. This has been a long time coming and is a result of numerous complex factors, but I can finally accept and publicly acknowledge this important change. Now, where to go from here...

Social democratic?

I can’t say that, at this time, I identify with any specific ideological orientation. However, I do still hold most of my practical political views (for example, I’m still a Sanders supporter).

I don't think I can self-identify as a Socialist/Marxist anymore. This has been a long time coming and is a result of numerous complex factors, but I can finally accept and publicly acknowledge this important change. Now, where to go from here...

What issues caused this split?

The simple answer is that I’ve always had my reservations about some of the essential philosophical underpinnings of Marxism. Marx’s critiques of capitalism were largely correct and he has been a positive force in world history for elaborating his criticisms of that socioeconomic system; however, he failed to articulate a fully developed alternative, many of his predictions failed to materialize as capitalism evolved in unexpected ways, and there are flaws with his historical materialism, such as its lack of falsifiability (for an allegedly scientific theory). In addition, his criticisms of the division of labor and specialization wherein he promised a Socialist future where such divisions are abolished, seems rather unrealistic. It has also proven unrealistic that the proletariat class could ever prioritize the interests of their class on a universal level; cultural identity, whether ethnic or national, has proven too strong in nearly every historical instance that this has been tested.

Again, I find Marx incredibly insightful and a necessary voice of criticism for a deeply flawed socioeconomic system (capitalism), but that his theories aren’t entirely accurate or reliable outside of a late 19th century Western European context. I don’t know where, exactly, my beliefs are going from here. I still very much align with Social Democrats (such as Sanders) on most common political issues (especially economics), I still prize egalitarianism, and I still loathe capitalism. But, I can’t accept the Marxist perspective anymore.

[JA]

The Weather Channel is saying there's a 70% chance of a tornado in the KC metro today - the highest chance of such severe weather since I moved here last summer. I am definitely anxious about such a threat here on the Plains; these aren't Florida tornadoes...

[JA]

The Weather Channel is saying there's a 70% chance of a tornado in the KC metro today - the highest chance of such severe weather since I moved here last summer. I am definitely anxious about such a threat here on the Plains; these aren't Florida tornadoes...

So far, this has been a weird storm.  Major damage 10 miles from here, and I've barely seen rain.

Apparently, the storm entered a cycling process just as it entered Parkville. So, it weakened and lifted off the ground before restrenngthening and touching down again in Clay County. Lucky for me, that meant I was just barely missed by the tornado. All I saw was heavy rain and lightning up here between Zona Rosa and KCI.

The tornado allegedly reached .75-1 mile wide and winds were around 150-200mph at its peak. One storm chaser reported to the local news seeing a brick home as a pile of rubble.

[JA]

I'm almost certain that I want to return to school and further my education. Although my Sociology degree has proven invaluable in terms of benefitting me personally (it really helped to open my eyes, challenged my previous ignorant worldview, and made me a good enough person to meet and fall in love with my fiancee), it has done practically nothing for my career prospects and I have no interest in Marketing or Social Work.

So, I want to return to school, study the necessary prerequisites, and pursue a Masters degree in some quantitative/STEM field like Statistics. I don't know which degree in particular quite yet, but I do know that I want to work in a field that aligns with my "Incestigative" personality type and focuses on numbers and analysis.

[JA]

I talked to an admissions counselor at a prospective university for graduate school today. I am quite excited and really hope that I am able to go back to school this fall. Earning an MS in Data Science will be quite difficult, but I look forward to this challenge and what opportunities it'll present to me

[JA]

I came out as non-binary to my fiancee tonight. It's something that I've known forever without really knowing it. I never felt comfortable embracing any sort of masculine identity, but accepted he/him simply because it was easier and less socially awkward than changing pronouns and identity. I just embraced me as me and thought very little of masculine gender labels, except that they oddly made me feel a uncomfortable.

So, this is something that doesn't, overall, change much for me on a daily basis. I'm not "coming out" to anyone else or asking anyone to refer to me as they/them, aside from my fiancee and anyone on here, if they can remember to do so. I feel a lot more comfortable with myself and my fiancee has been so supportive, which helps a lot.