How would the following movies end if they were directed by M. Night Shaymalan

[I spent the winter writing songs about getting better]

Part 2. The sequel to this: https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=77548.0

The Dark Knight
The Wrestler
Slumdog Millionaire
Traffic
The Wackness
Alpha Dog
Fight Club
Frost/Nixon
Milk
Donnie Darko
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Lars and the Real Girl

[I spent the winter writing songs about getting better]

Here's some of my guesses:

The Dark Knight - Some lame twist where the Joker turns out to actually be the good guy.
Traffic - The top druglord was really Michael Douglas
Slumdog Millionaire - He really did cheat, and he made the entire story up
The Wackness - Ben Kingsley is really employed by Rudy Giuliani
Frost/Nixon - The interviews never happened, it was a dream by Nixon
Milk - Harvey Milk committed suicide, Dan White was just a multiple personality
Lars and the Real Girl - Lars was the only normal person in the town, everyone else was crazy, and the girl was actually real.

[RosettaStoned]

Here's some of my guesses:

The Dark Knight - Some lame twist where the Joker turns out to actually be the good guy.
Traffic - The top druglord was really Michael Douglas
Slumdog Millionaire - He really did cheat, and he made the entire story up
The Wackness - Ben Kingsley is really employed by Rudy Giuliani
Frost/Nixon - The interviews never happened, it was a dream by Nixon
Milk - Harvey Milk committed suicide, Dan White was just a multiple personality
Lars and the Real Girl - Lars was the only normal person in the town, everyone else was crazy, and the girl was actually real.

Sounds about right. M. Night SUCKS!

[Smid]

Sounds about right. M. Night SUCKS!

Incorrect, sir, he is one of the most original directors to emerge in the past twenty years.

BRTD - this thread has the potential to become one of my comedic favourites. I don't think I've got the wit to answer the questions, but I think some of the suggestions to be posted here will be very humourous. I chuckled at your answers.

[I spent the winter writing songs about getting better]

Sounds about right. M. Night SUCKS!

Incorrect, sir, he is one of the most original directors to emerge in the past twenty years.

He just needs to stay away from the lame twist endings. The only one that worked was The Sixth Sense. The Village's ending is basically my pick for the worst movie ending of all time. Bottom 5 at least.

[RosettaStoned]

Sounds about right. M. Night SUCKS!

Incorrect, sir, he is one of the most original directors to emerge in the past twenty years.

BRTD - this thread has the potential to become one of my comedic favourites. I don't think I've got the wit to answer the questions, but I think some of the suggestions to be posted here will be very humourous. I chuckled at your answers.

Hahahahaha! You can't be serious!

[Smid]

Sounds about right. M. Night SUCKS!

Incorrect, sir, he is one of the most original directors to emerge in the past twenty years.

BRTD - this thread has the potential to become one of my comedic favourites. I don't think I've got the wit to answer the questions, but I think some of the suggestions to be posted here will be very humourous. I chuckled at your answers.

Hahahahaha! You can't be serious!

Yeah, I was trying to be a little tongue-in-cheek/over-the-top, although that said, I do really like him. Sixth Sense was good, but I also really liked Unbreakable. I thought that was a really good movie too. I enjoyed Signs but I don't think the ending was much of a twist.

[Mint]

Yeah, I was trying to be a little tongue-in-cheek/over-the-top, although that said, I do really like him. Sixth Sense was good, but I also really liked Unbreakable. I thought that was a really good movie too. I enjoyed Signs but I don't think the ending was much of a twist.

The ending for Signs was embarrassingly stupid, and I liked Signs. But that's pretty much the last good movie he made. Everything after has gotten progressively more atrocious.

[Mr. Morden]

The Dark Knight - The Joker becomes sane when exposed to water.

The Wrestler - The wrestling was all faked.

Traffic - Drugs turn out to actually be good for you.

Alpha Dog - Bruce Willis's character is actually dead....and a superhero.

Fight Club - Every character in the movie is actually the same person.

Frost/Nixon -  The Democrats actually faked the Watergate break in, and Nixon had nothing to do with it.  Also, Nixon himself is Deep Throat, and his first name turns out not to be Frost.

Milk - Harvey Milk realizes that he's actually straight, while everyone else in the world is gay.  Also, milk turns out to be bad for you.

Donnie Darko - "Frank" is actually Michael Dukakis in a bunny costume, who's attempting to use time travel to send Donnie back in time to cover up the Democrats' involvement in the Watergate hoax.  (That last part wouldn't have actually made any sense at the time the movie was released back in 2001.  But the prequel, Frost/Nixon, would have eventually cleared everything up.)

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button - Benjamin Button de-ages until he becomes an embryo, at which point, his stem cells are extracted, which simultaneously provides the cure to Alzheimer's disease and protects New Orleans from Hurricane Katrina.

Lars and the Real Girl - The girl is revealed to be fake.

[Smid]

Yeah, I was trying to be a little tongue-in-cheek/over-the-top, although that said, I do really like him. Sixth Sense was good, but I also really liked Unbreakable. I thought that was a really good movie too. I enjoyed Signs but I don't think the ending was much of a twist.

The ending for Signs was embarrassingly stupid, and I liked Signs. But that's pretty much the last good movie he made. Everything after has gotten progressively more atrocious.

I agree with your first sentence, and can't comment on your final two sentences as I haven't seen any of his others, except for the ones I mentioned.

[The Mikado]

Sounds about right. M. Night SUCKS!

Incorrect, sir, he is one of the most original directors to emerge in the past twenty years.

He just needs to stay away from the lame twist endings. The only one that worked was The Sixth Sense. The Village's ending is basically my pick for the worst movie ending of all time. Bottom 5 at least.

The Village was bad, true.  However, the ending was pretty thoroughly telegraphed for a while, so I wasn't even surprised..

Did you see The Lady in the Water?  It's so screwball that I have to think that our friend M. Night was just making fun of all of the things critics say about him.  The most amusing/disturbing (not disturbing to me, mind you, disturbing in terms that M. Night Shaymalan is vindictive enough to do this) scene involves a movie critic who has been panning the movie the entire time (FROM WITHIN THE MOVIE) being violently eaten by the film's monster.  WTF, M. Night?  Do critics really get that far under your skin?  That's really, really not normal.

[Matt Damon™]

M. Night Shyamalan is a god of cinema.