Conservatives: if you had a child who came out as transgender, how would you react?

[Ferguson97]

Sincere question. Many people change their perspective on this kind of thing when it applies to a close family member.

If one day your child told you that they were transgender and identified with a different gender than their biological sex, what would your reaction be?

[OSR stands with Israel]

Honestly my answer is no idea as you have no idea until it happens really . Though it depends on the age of the kid as well as elementary school vs high school would be very different scenarios

[Del Tachi]

The answer to this hypothetical obviously depends on a lot of unknown factors, especially exactly how old the child is.  It is not unusual for pre-pubescent children to engage in gender non-conforming behavior or even say they sometimes feel like the opposite gender.

If my kid told me he was trans, my gut instinct would be to unpack what they are feeling about gender norms/roles.  I would stress that there is no one way to be a boy or a girl and that no one is a 100% "match" to the gender stereotypes associated with their biological sex.  I would also try to be very body positive with them. 

[Vosem]

Would be sort of upset since this would imply a greater likelihood of getting all sorts of illnesses down the road, physical and mental, but I would try to support them in living a happy life as best I could. Saying more depends on their age and their personality.

[MiddleRoad]

I would only take it seriously if the child was past the age of 18. At which point they could go their separate ways from my home and do as they wanted with their life. Wouldn’t get them therapy or force them to live as any gender, I’d just wash my hands of it and realize I must’ve seriously failed as a parent. As I’ve learned in other family relationships, it’s better to cut a painful cord than be confronted with it over and over.

[dead0man]

I'm not particularly conservative (I don't hate guns and don't really care for the Democratic party, and take police shootings on a case by case basis instead of knee jerk assuming the cop was wrong, so I must be conservative!), but I'll tell you what I did when this very thing happened to me.


I kept loving my child, and me and mom had a hard time changing pronouns.  If you call someone one thing for THEIR ENTIRE LIVES, it's hard to change right away.

[Conservatopia]

I would explain to them why I believe they are wrong from a religious, scientific and common sense point of view. If they continued to believe in it, I'm not sure what I would I do. I certainly wouldn't ever accept it and would take it is evidence that I was a complete failure as a parent. I would keep trying to persuade them against it and would restrict their access to material that promotes this sort of thing.

[John Dule]

I would approach the situation with exactly the same type of compassion and understanding that I have demonstrated so many other times when discussing these issues.

[Associate Justice PiT]

     I would explain why I disagree with their choice, but I would also let them know that no matter what happens I will love them and I won't abandon them. If they are minors I would not help them in their efforts to transition, but I will remind them that once they are 18 they are free from my headship and can go through with this if they are still committed to transitioning.

[Dr. MB]

I would explain to them why I believe they are wrong from a religious, scientific and common sense point of view. If they continued to believe in it, I'm not sure what I would I do. I certainly wouldn't ever accept it and would take it is evidence that I was a complete failure as a parent. I would keep trying to persuade them against it and would restrict their access to material that promotes this sort of thing.

So would you rather lose your relationship with your kid than even begrudgingly accept them?

[LAKISYLVANIA]

I would explain to them why I believe they are wrong from a religious, scientific and common sense point of view. If they continued to believe in it, I'm not sure what I would I do. I certainly wouldn't ever accept it and would take it is evidence that I was a complete failure as a parent. I would keep trying to persuade them against it and would restrict their access to material that promotes this sort of thing.

"scientific" point of view, so that would be telling lies, since science wouldn't support your claims.

I would explain to them why I believe they are wrong from a religious, scientific and common sense point of view. If they continued to believe in it, I'm not sure what I would I do. I certainly wouldn't ever accept it and would take it is evidence that I was a complete failure as a parent. I would keep trying to persuade them against it and would restrict their access to material that promotes this sort of thing.

So would you rather lose your relationship with your kid than even begrudgingly accept them?

so much for the conservative talking point: "family values above everything"

[parochial boy]

Don't blame me, your chromosomes are your mum's fault.... oh wait, no, shït... Sorry kiddo....

[🐒Gods of Prosperity🔱🐲💸]

I would explain to them why I believe they are wrong from a religious, scientific and common sense point of view. If they continued to believe in it, I'm not sure what I would I do. I certainly wouldn't ever accept it and would take it is evidence that I was a complete failure as a parent. I would keep trying to persuade them against it and would restrict their access to material that promotes this sort of thing.

So would you rather lose your relationship with your kid than even begrudgingly accept them?

Why did you interpret his post to mean that?

[Goldwater]

I would explain to them why I believe they are wrong from a religious, scientific and common sense point of view. If they continued to believe in it, I'm not sure what I would I do. I certainly wouldn't ever accept it and would take it is evidence that I was a complete failure as a parent. I would keep trying to persuade them against it and would restrict their access to material that promotes this sort of thing.

So would you rather lose your relationship with your kid than even begrudgingly accept them?

Why did you interpret his post to mean that?

What other way is there to interpret it?

[🦀🎂🦀🎂]

Dw nobody on atlas is having children, conservative or not.

[🐒Gods of Prosperity🔱🐲💸]

I would explain to them why I believe they are wrong from a religious, scientific and common sense point of view. If they continued to believe in it, I'm not sure what I would I do. I certainly wouldn't ever accept it and would take it is evidence that I was a complete failure as a parent. I would keep trying to persuade them against it and would restrict their access to material that promotes this sort of thing.

So would you rather lose your relationship with your kid than even begrudgingly accept them?

Why did you interpret his post to mean that?

What other way is there to interpret it?

Is your assumption that your kid would break their relationship with you if you tried to prevent them from embracing a trans identity?

[Dr. MB]

I would explain to them why I believe they are wrong from a religious, scientific and common sense point of view. If they continued to believe in it, I'm not sure what I would I do. I certainly wouldn't ever accept it and would take it is evidence that I was a complete failure as a parent. I would keep trying to persuade them against it and would restrict their access to material that promotes this sort of thing.

So would you rather lose your relationship with your kid than even begrudgingly accept them?

Why did you interpret his post to mean that?

What other way is there to interpret it?

Is your assumption that your kid would break their relationship with you if you tried to prevent them from embracing a trans identity?

If they don’t break it off entirely the relationship is definitely gonna be strained. Especially if the “prevention” continues after they become an adult.

[Ferguson97]

I would explain to them why I believe they are wrong from a religious, scientific and common sense point of view. If they continued to believe in it, I'm not sure what I would I do. I certainly wouldn't ever accept it and would take it is evidence that I was a complete failure as a parent. I would keep trying to persuade them against it and would restrict their access to material that promotes this sort of thing.

So would you rather lose your relationship with your kid than even begrudgingly accept them?

Why did you interpret his post to mean that?

What other way is there to interpret it?

Is your assumption that your kid would break their relationship with you if you tried to prevent them from embracing a trans identity?

Yes, and this is often the case for trans kids (and gay/bi/lesbian kids). Having the person who is supposed to love you unconditionally refuse to accept a fundamental aspect of your identity is really traumatizing.

[OSR stands with Israel]

I would explain to them why I believe they are wrong from a religious, scientific and common sense point of view. If they continued to believe in it, I'm not sure what I would I do. I certainly wouldn't ever accept it and would take it is evidence that I was a complete failure as a parent. I would keep trying to persuade them against it and would restrict their access to material that promotes this sort of thing.

So would you rather lose your relationship with your kid than even begrudgingly accept them?

Why did you interpret his post to mean that?

What other way is there to interpret it?

Is your assumption that your kid would break their relationship with you if you tried to prevent them from embracing a trans identity?

Yes, and this is often the case for trans kids (and gay/bi/lesbian kids). Having the person who is supposed to love you unconditionally refuse to accept a fundamental aspect of your identity is really traumatizing.

So you are saying if an 8 year old child of us says one day they are different gender and we decide that they are not , that means we dont love our child.

[RFayette]

Were I in this situation, I would urge my child that this form of self-identification is wrong and deeply unwise.  I would seek to explain that his sense of incongruity with his own created sex is a result of original sin (in interaction with current social pressures/assumptions) but does not mean that one is fundamentally the opposite gender.  I would continue to love him and pray for him, but I would never condone the sinful LGBT lifestyle, nor would I allow any kind of steps toward medical transition including puberty blockers so long as he is under my roof. 

[MiddleRoad]

I would explain to them why I believe they are wrong from a religious, scientific and common sense point of view. If they continued to believe in it, I'm not sure what I would I do. I certainly wouldn't ever accept it and would take it is evidence that I was a complete failure as a parent. I would keep trying to persuade them against it and would restrict their access to material that promotes this sort of thing.

So would you rather lose your relationship with your kid than even begrudgingly accept them?

Why did you interpret his post to mean that?

What other way is there to interpret it?

Is your assumption that your kid would break their relationship with you if you tried to prevent them from embracing a trans identity?

Yes, and this is often the case for trans kids (and gay/bi/lesbian kids). Having the person who is supposed to love you unconditionally refuse to accept a fundamental aspect of your identity is really traumatizing.

So you are saying if an 8 year old child of us says one day they are different gender and we decide that they are not , that means we dont love our child.

A 2 year old can decide their sexuality and gender and if you’re not a Nazi you WILL accept it.

[Ferguson97]

I would explain to them why I believe they are wrong from a religious, scientific and common sense point of view. If they continued to believe in it, I'm not sure what I would I do. I certainly wouldn't ever accept it and would take it is evidence that I was a complete failure as a parent. I would keep trying to persuade them against it and would restrict their access to material that promotes this sort of thing.

So would you rather lose your relationship with your kid than even begrudgingly accept them?

Why did you interpret his post to mean that?

What other way is there to interpret it?

Is your assumption that your kid would break their relationship with you if you tried to prevent them from embracing a trans identity?

Yes, and this is often the case for trans kids (and gay/bi/lesbian kids). Having the person who is supposed to love you unconditionally refuse to accept a fundamental aspect of your identity is really traumatizing.

So you are saying if an 8 year old child of us says one day they are different gender and we decide that they are not, that means we dont love our child.

Correct.

It's no different from those psychos who have a son, but wanted a daughter, so they force him to wear a dress and raise him as a daughter against his will.

[MiddleRoad]

I would explain to them why I believe they are wrong from a religious, scientific and common sense point of view. If they continued to believe in it, I'm not sure what I would I do. I certainly wouldn't ever accept it and would take it is evidence that I was a complete failure as a parent. I would keep trying to persuade them against it and would restrict their access to material that promotes this sort of thing.

So would you rather lose your relationship with your kid than even begrudgingly accept them?

Why did you interpret his post to mean that?

What other way is there to interpret it?

Is your assumption that your kid would break their relationship with you if you tried to prevent them from embracing a trans identity?

Yes, and this is often the case for trans kids (and gay/bi/lesbian kids). Having the person who is supposed to love you unconditionally refuse to accept a fundamental aspect of your identity is really traumatizing.

So you are saying if an 8 year old child of us says one day they are different gender and we decide that they are not, that means we dont love our child.

Correct.

It's no different from those psychos who have a son, but wanted a daughter, so they force him to wear a dress and raise him as a daughter against his will.

Yes. They should have their kids taken from them, too.

[certified hummus supporter 🇵🇸🤝🇺🇸🤝🇺🇦]

Firstly, I'd need to somehow find a woman who is willing to have a kid with me. Ask me again in around 15-20 years for my response.

[Alben Barkley]

Not conservative, although some here including you probably consider me one (wrongly) on this issue.

A lot would depend on the circumstances, especially age. I would in any case try to explain that gender roles are social constructs, but biological sex is not, and is fundamentally impossible to change even if you really want to. I would say there is nothing wrong with not conforming to all of society’s expectations for gender and it doesn’t mean you have to change your body or anything else about yourself. I would explain all the dangers and handicaps that come with adopting this lifestyle in a matter of fact way, as a warning of all the risks and downsides that come from things like sex reassignment surgery (including loss of reproductive ability — especially concerning to me as I would want grandkids — and sexual function), all the prejudices and difficulties fitting in with society likely to be encountered, etc. I would make absolutely sure it is not just a phase and not something that came about as a result of peer pressure, the Internet, etc. And I would not allow puberty blockers, hormones, or any other irreversible/physical changes until the kid is 18, while at least discouraging social transition (especially if the kid is younger).

But at the end of the day, if the kid is hellbent on it and persists with it as an adult, I would atill love and support them.