The Comedy Goldmine(ONLY FUNNY ATLAS POSTS ALLOWED, NO BRTD ALLOWED)

[bullmoose88]

No offence, but could we please take this somewhere else? I'm trying to find something funny about these posts, but I'm not getting it...

I'm not (and I think Sam won't either) bending over backwards for you.

I thought bending over forwards was what you and Sam were concerned about?

Shrug, whatever! Don't be so anal about this man...All I'm saying is that we wish to protect our "out" shoots.

[MODU]

No offence, but could we please take this somewhere else? I'm trying to find something funny about these posts, but I'm not getting it...

I'm not (and I think Sam won't either) bending over backwards for you.

I thought bending over forwards was what you and Sam were concerned about?

Shrug, whatever! Don't be so anal about this man...All I'm saying is that we wish to protect our "out" shoots.

NEED INPUT.  (I didn't realize Johnny #5 was in the Brokeback Mountain sequel.)

[Cubby]

Bullmoose don't worry you're cool. But Sam Spade is mean because he's from Texas, and that's where that guy was lynched in Brokeback Mountain

Wasn't that the movie where the filmmakers somehow tried to convince us that people who herd sheep are somehow cowboys?  I don't know because I never saw it.

Quite frankly, there's nothing funnier and yet sadder than enlightened city folk talking about rural life.

Besides, in the part of Texas that I'm from lynching is something that is used exclusively for black people and should not be sullied with anything else.

The original story was written by Annie Proulx, who has spent much of her life living in Wyoming, where the story was set. Rural people can write about gays too, they aren't all "city folk". The screenplay was written in part by Larry McMurtry, who I'm sure you're familiar with. He's written dozens of novels on rural life. Before you slam something, maybe you should do some research.

[Michael Z]

Needs to be read in context:

"4 g4vvD 50 |_0\/3D 7h3 vv0|=|_D, 7h47 h3 g4\/3 h15 0|\||_`/ 50|\|, 7h47 vvh03\/3|= 63133\/35 1|\| h!/\/\ 5h0|_||_D |\|07 P3|=15h 6|_|7 h4\/3 4|\| 373|=|\|4|_ |_1f3."

[Platypus]

Everybody, follow Michael's example and post my posts here. !75 g00D f0|= |_|.

[MODU]

Everybody, follow Michael's example and post my posts here. !75 g00D f0|= |_|.

I'm sorry, but I can only read/understand English and binary. 

[Filuwaúrdjan]

Vote for HOMELESS NAZI GUY, with the platform everyone can agree on:

- what the hell do i write here
- i want some GODDAMN SHOES
- why do the black men do heroin
- alcohol is much cheaper
- goddamn ns
- we need to ban math and corner stores so the chinese stop being good at something

[Filuwaúrdjan]

I'll take Warner in the No. 1 or 2 slot.

You pervert.

[riceowl]

beat me to it.

[bullmoose88]

beat me to it.

Terrible choice in words

[riceowl]

you'd think so, no?

[Gabu]

If Jack was having trouble dismounting a horse, would you help Jack off the horse?

[MaC]

about twice a week, opebo's funny:

I don't like your prudery, your intolerance, or your fascism, but I have nothing against you personally.

However I thought I was the most unpopular poster.

[bgwah]

I'm left to choose to between a dumbass and a jackass. It's tough...but I would probably vote for Straha because he at least tries to contribute to intelligent conversation where as Jesus...well...you've read his posts.

[Michael Z]

The mental association involving Clare Short and a 'whip' has put me off my tea and muffin

[I spent the winter writing songs about getting better]

On Spitzer already booking his inaguration party:

This may have cost him the election....

In Hamilton county.

[Joe Republic]

For the "wtf" pile:

people who watch things on their computer are disturbing.

[I spent the winter writing songs about getting better]

obviously both will win. but santorum will break 60% against the silly populist, so ill vote for him.

[Joe Republic]

Another one for the 'wtf' pile:

Chris Bell: Runs for Congress next time around. Results would depend strongly depend on the partisan make-up of the district as I doubt anyone but Democratic loyalists really hold an intrest in him. My guess is that (unless he runs in a border district) he'll lose.

Carole Strayhorn: She may run in the Republican gubernatorial primary. If she does, she'll lose badly and probably retire. One Senile Grandma isn't getting any younger.

Kinky Friedman: Will go back to writing books and doing satire, I will continue to be a big fan. Maybe we can draft him to run again in 2010.

Max Linn: Will run for governor again under the "Will Govern for Food Party".

Christy Mihos: Perhaps run for state representative, or congress. I think he would make a great satirist, I think he's hilarious.

John Faso: Will move to Florida and run for Lt. Governor under Max Linn's newly formed party.

Jim Davis: Return to his day job as an attorney, and fade into political nothingness.

Phil Angelides: Will spend the next 10 years meditating on exactly how bad he blew this election.

Just a few.

Hey Adam, I have a question,

Do you like pet rats? I have two pet rats. Their names are Sir cuddles and Lord snuggles

[Keystone Phil]

Thank you, Alcon, for one of the best posts ever:

Irey is such a long shot she shouldn't be counted.  Bachman certainly is easy on the eyes but once she opens her mouth and I realize how crazy she is, she disqualifies herself from my hotness list...

"Talk to me dirty about social security, baby."

Another one for the 'wtf' pile:

Do you like pet rats? I have two pet rats. Their names are Sir cuddles and Lord snuggles

I was wondering what the hell that one was about, too, as I was trying to seriously read that thread.

[WalterMitty]

For the "wtf" pile:

people who watch things on their computer are disturbing.

i stand by that comment.

[bgwah]

MasterJedi I guess, though neither are really hacks.

[Joe Republic]

For the "wtf" pile:

people who watch things on their computer are disturbing.

i stand by that comment.

I'm sure you do, but that doesn't disqualify it from this thread.

[Filuwaúrdjan]

And the New York GOP continues its slow and plodding march into the East River.

[WMS]

I've recently started a new job at a fresh fish and fish and chiop shop. I applied to about 30 places and the only one that'd hire me and give me reasonable hours was this one, because the only other job i've had of reasonable length was at a...fish and chip shop

This explains everything, I figured it couldn't be because of something else...

Think about this one.