The Nyman Questioner Volume 2018 (WE'RE BACK)

[Wells]

We bet you thought you'd seen the last of us.

If so, you thought wrong.

The Nyman Questioner is a news organization dedicated to prioritizing entertainment and sensationalism above all else. We are most famous for calling for President D. F. W Liberty Lover's impeachment for getting into a bar fight, exposing numerous cases of voter fraud and corruption, investigating the circumstances that surrounded Winfield's fall from riches to rags, making pivotal endorsements in a large number of elections, and criticizing the Nyman establishment. And we did it all over the course of four months in 2017.

In 2018 we will continue the tireless work of exposing the swamp for what they truly are, bringing hot takes and commentary that can be enjoyed by anyone who doesn't take things too seriously. (Therefore, the likes of Winfield may want to ignore what this publication says, especially if it is about a topic.)

The one big difference between 2017 and 2018 is there is only one reporter/correspondent/columnist who works for the Questioner. It is the somewhat venerable Michael Wells, who makes a habit of referring to himself in the first person plural and more recently the third person singular when writing articles for the Questioner. There are currently no signs that this habit will stop.

Regardless, we hope to reach a large audience of concerned citizens who want nothing more than to see an Atlasia that is truly of the people, by the people, and by the people and who believe that the only way to accomplish that is to expose the truth, even if the truth has to be made up. It may make others uncomfortable, but as we always say, (alternative) facts over feelings!

 - The Nyman Questioner Editorial Board (i.e. Mike Wells)

(If you want to see the last thread then check out this link which will let you read all our 2017 articles in all their glory. Be prepared for an article very soon!)

[wxtransit]

Ooooh, yay!

[President of the great nation of 🏳️‍⚧️]

It's back!

[_]

Oh my this will be fun.

[Terry the Fat Shark]

I forget do I still work for you guys

[Wells]

I forget do I still work for you guys

I laid off all employees except myself until I change my mind.

[Pericles]

I forget do I still work for you guys

I laid off all employees except myself until I change my mind.

This is great! Btw did you see my PM?

[Wells]

OBITUARIES: THE LABOR PARTY (JANUARY 28, 2012 - JANUARY 23, 2018)

 Perhaps no party has been more influential in Atlasian politics than the Labor Party. From the atics with Adam Griffin, who permanently changed the way the game is played, to the other eight presidents that the party produced, without them we would have a very different Atlasia.

 Yet all things must come to an end and we here at the Questioner are very pleased that it did. Labor was one of the two arms of the dreadful swamp machine, the other arm being the Federalist Party which regretfully was barely even massacred this week. Now the most influential left wing parties are the Progressive Union Party and Peace.

 The PUP was actually founded by a Federalist defector (but they still have an ideology, trust us).  The party represents the interests of more center-left minded people, naturally making it indistinguishable from any other party that exists sans the fact that there isn't corruption to be seen anywhere. Peace was founded by an Independent, because Labor's demise wasn't because they were proactive after all. Thy represent the far-left fringe interests, which means they'll never be successful enough to experience the full extent of the swamp. And that's just fine by us.

 When we reached out to Federalist leaders, they all had different things to say. Doof F. W. Liberty Lover said, "Whoops I didn't know I could do that." Leinad whispered under his breath "Good riddance," before giving us his official statement. Frank Taggin's full statement was: "Oh God, you guys are back? Listen, Labor fell because its leadership wasn't invested enough in the game to - " after which her ten seconds of looking up from her desk in the Oval Office was up and she went back to doing whatever presidents do.

 We tried to reach out to former Laborites to see what they had to say, but we couldn't find them anywhere.

UPDATE September 1: Upon visiting the final (?) resting place of the Labor Party I noticed the stone was rolled away and the tomb was empty. This is deeply disturbing. I wish to discover more.

[wxtransit]

OBITUARIES: THE LABOR PARTY (JANUARY 28, 2012 - JANUARY 23, 2018)

 Perhaps no party has been more influential in Atlasian politics than the Labor Party. From the atics with Adam Griffin, who permanently changed the way the game is played, to the other eight presidents that the party produced, without them we would have a very different Atlasia.

 Yet all things must come to an end and we here at the Questioner are very pleased that it did. Labor was one of the two arms of the dreadful swamp machine, the other arm being the Federalist Party which regretfully was barely even massacred this week. Now the most influential left wing parties are the Progressive Union Party and Peace.

 The PUP was actually founded by a Federalist defector (but they still have an ideology, trust us).  The party represents the interests of more center-left minded people, naturally making it indistinguishable from any other party that exists sans the fact that there isn't corruption to be seen anywhere. Peace was founded by an Independent, because Labor's demise wasn't because they were proactive after all. Thy represent the far-left fringe interests, which means they'll never be successful enough to experience the full extent of the swamp. And that's just fine by us.

 When we reached out to Federalist leaders, they all had different things to say. Doof F. W. Liberty Lover said, "Whoops I didn't know I could do that." Leinad whispered under his breath "Good riddance," before giving us his official statement. Frank Taggin's full statement was: "Oh God, you guys are back? Listen, Labor fell because its leadership wasn't invested enough in the game to - " after which her ten seconds of looking up from her desk in the Oval Office was up and she went back to doing whatever presidents do.

 We tried to reach out to former Laborites to see what they had to say, but we couldn't find them anywhere.

Oof.

[OneJ]

OBITUARIES: THE LABOR PARTY (JANUARY 28, 2012 - JANUARY 23, 2018)

 Perhaps no party has been more influential in Atlasian politics than the Labor Party. From the atics with Adam Griffin, who permanently changed the way the game is played, to the other eight presidents that the party produced, without them we would have a very different Atlasia.

 Yet all things must come to an end and we here at the Questioner are very pleased that it did. Labor was one of the two arms of the dreadful swamp machine, the other arm being the Federalist Party which regretfully was barely even massacred this week. Now the most influential left wing parties are the Progressive Union Party and Peace.

 The PUP was actually founded by a Federalist defector (but they still have an ideology, trust us).  The party represents the interests of more center-left minded people, naturally making it indistinguishable from any other party that exists sans the fact that there isn't corruption to be seen anywhere. Peace was founded by an Independent, because Labor's demise wasn't because they were proactive after all. Thy represent the far-left fringe interests, which means they'll never be successful enough to experience the full extent of the swamp. And that's just fine by us.

 When we reached out to Federalist leaders, they all had different things to say. Doof F. W. Liberty Lover said, "Whoops I didn't know I could do that." Leinad whispered under his breath "Good riddance," before giving us his official statement. Frank Taggin's full statement was: "Oh God, you guys are back? Listen, Labor fell because its leadership wasn't invested enough in the game to - " after which her ten seconds of looking up from her desk in the Oval Office was up and she went back to doing whatever presidents do.

 We tried to reach out to former Laborites to see what they had to say, but we couldn't find them anywhere.

This was deep, especially that last part. Where are they now?

[DFL]

This was deep, especially that last part. Where are they now?

The big commune in the sky

[Lachi]

OBITUARIES: THE LABOR PARTY (JANUARY 28, 2012 - JANUARY 23, 2018)

 Perhaps no party has been more influential in Atlasian politics than the Labor Party. From the atics with Adam Griffin, who permanently changed the way the game is played, to the other eight presidents that the party produced, without them we would have a very different Atlasia.

 Yet all things must come to an end and we here at the Questioner are very pleased that it did. Labor was one of the two arms of the dreadful swamp machine, the other arm being the Federalist Party which regretfully was barely even massacred this week. Now the most influential left wing parties are the Progressive Union Party and Peace.

 The PUP was actually founded by a Federalist defector (but they still have an ideology, trust us).  The party represents the interests of more center-left minded people, naturally making it indistinguishable from any other party that exists sans the fact that there isn't corruption to be seen anywhere. Peace was founded by an Independent, because Labor's demise wasn't because they were proactive after all. Thy represent the far-left fringe interests, which means they'll never be successful enough to experience the full extent of the swamp. And that's just fine by us.

 When we reached out to Federalist leaders, they all had different things to say. Doof F. W. Liberty Lover said, "Whoops I didn't know I could do that." Leinad whispered under his breath "Good riddance," before giving us his official statement. Frank Taggin's full statement was: "Oh God, you guys are back? Listen, Labor fell because its leadership wasn't invested enough in the game to - " after which her ten seconds of looking up from her desk in the Oval Office was up and she went back to doing whatever presidents do.

 We tried to reach out to former Laborites to see what they had to say, but we couldn't find them anywhere.

This was deep, especially that last part. Where are they now?

Carried into a back room.

[Wells]

ON CONFLICTS OF INTEREST

Recently we've seen candidates take stances against dual office holding, with some saying that it leads to corruption and other nasty things while others point out that Atlasia is sparsely populated when it comes to activity. As the Vice President on a ticket that takes a strong stance against holding any more offices than the number of terms Frank Taggin will have, I have a lot to say about this topic.

But you'd see right through that, wouldn't you? I know my readers aren't stupid, they know when they're being tricked (since we expose it) so it would be patronizing to try to trick them with a seemingly sensible editorial, when there is a real reason to take it with a grain of salt or two. Ideally a reader would have put as much sodium in that editorial as a Big Mac.

But we aren't writing that editorial. Instead, this is a letter from the editor saying that while he is on the ticket with Pericles, he will not be editing or writing any articles for this newspaper. The integrity of this newspaper would be compromised by me being a part of a major ticket - just imagine how seriously you would be able to take our Presidential endorsement. But that does not mean you won't receive any articles at all. It just means that they will be written by a different person.

Setting out to prove President Taggin wrong about dual office holding, I tried to find someone who could write articles at least half as well as I could. Harry Truman is qualified, so it wasn't surprising that he had found another job doing just that. Isaac Cummings is also qualified, but I decided that would be too cliche for this paper at this point. After going down a long list of people, I couldn't find anyone who fit the form of an ideal Questioner reporter.

Desperate for someone, I turned to supernatural solutions. After contacting a psychic, she told me that she would be able to contact dead Atlasians for me and let them publish through my account. Overjoyed that I had found a solution, I immediately decided that the next article will be written by a dead person, hopefully making us the very first publication to have published a currently deceased Atlasian's first piece of work. (Kalwejt doesn't count because his death happened after his first articles were published.)

[Mr. Reactionary]

As the Vice President on a ticket that takes a strong stance against holding any more offices than the number of terms Frank Taggin will have.

She's already on her 2nd so you can still write for the paper and run for office. That's also only 2.

[Wells]

As the Vice President on a ticket that takes a strong stance against holding any more offices than the number of terms Frank Taggin will have.

She's already on her 2nd so you can still write for the paper and run for office. That's also only 2.

The first one wasn't complete, so we can still say that even if it's a stretch.

[President of the great nation of 🏳️‍⚧️]

As the Vice President on a ticket that takes a strong stance against holding any more offices than the number of terms Frank Taggin will have.

She's already on her 2nd so you can still write for the paper and run for office. That's also only 2.

The first one wasn't complete, so we can still say that even if it's a stretch.

One and a half, then. Can I choose which half?

[Mr. Reactionary]

As the Vice President on a ticket that takes a strong stance against holding any more offices than the number of terms Frank Taggin will have.

She's already on her 2nd so you can still write for the paper and run for office. That's also only 2.

The first one wasn't complete, so we can still say that even if it's a stretch.

So take a week off from writing, since the President only missed out on a full term by like a week.

[fhtagn]

As the Vice President on a ticket that takes a strong stance against holding any more offices than the number of terms Frank Taggin will have.

She's already on her 2nd so you can still write for the paper and run for office. That's also only 2.

The first one wasn't complete, so we can still say that even if it's a stretch.

So take a week off from writing, since the President only missed out on a full term by like a week.

Well, it was actually like, half a term. Since the term was actually the one dfw won in June.

[Wells]

The questioners endorsement for president

ok so being a dead Atlasian was hard but now I'm back and ready to get my house campaign started again.

well i was just told that I'm here to write an article for a Atlasian newspapar so I'll do that instead I'm gonna write this newspapers endrosement for president .

(Who are the candiates? Pericles and fhtang?)

 I support the federalist candidate because they are theM OST RIGHT WING party. maybe perices is a nice guy but we want a conservative party to win ok.

[Pericles]

Shame I missed out on that endorsement. However, more importantly for voters, remember the Federalists are the MOST RIGHT-WING party and a conservative party as was just said. Therefore, if that's not your thing, vote for me.

[Wells]

It appears greedo was the dead guy. I'm sorry about that, but you'll just have to put up with him for the next couple weeks to the next few months depending on if we win the election. (I think that's probably a bigger endorsement of fhtagn than anything else to be honest.)

Anyway, this is unrelated, but I did click post on that article at 11:59 PM last night but it's just showing up just now for some reason. It must be because of my slow Atlas.

[Mr. Reactionary]

Anyway, this is unrelated, but I did click post on that article at 11:59 PM last night but it's just showing up just now for some reason. It must be because of my slow Atlas.

PM if you'd like to sue Dave for  $20,000

[wxtransit]

Shame I missed out on that endorsement. However, more importantly for voters, remember the Federalists are the MOST RIGHT-WING party and a conservative party as was just said. Therefore, if that's not your thing, vote for me.

Yes, in the same way that the social conservative Civic Platform party is the most left-wing major Polish party.

I mean, if you put me in a room with Hitler, Mussolini, and Francisco Franco, then I would be the MOST LEFT-WING person there, but that doesn't make me left wing (not even close to it, I'm a moderate conservative).

All due respect, but it sounds like you're trying to make the Feds out to be the Party of Trump and you're the #Resistance, which doesn't exactly work given their center-left social views. I'm no friend of the Feds, but this is a bit misleading.

[Pericles]

My point is that the Federalists fundamentally aren't a progressive party. They're no Donald Trump, but  it's similar to how people thought Trump would be a moderate or even economically progressive. It's just not the case.

[fhtagn]

No one in the party even claimed to be a progressive though, not even me. Though I am legitimately curious what I've done in office that makes you think I'm some massive right winger? But I imagine much like the numerous requests already made, you're still going to refuse to answer.