Classic Conservative wants to run your life!

[Classic Conservative]

MAKE ATLASIA RAD

My friends, my friends. I have taken a leave of absence from my wonderful investments which have included hookers, frat boys, Jesus and investment. When I haven't been at frat parties or hanging out with some of the hottest ladies on Earth, I have been closely watching the state of Atlasian politics. Let's just say our country is in a horrible downswing. We ain't protecting our jobs, our way of life, our babies, our old people and we ain't making enough laws to hurt our most needy in society. I am here tonight my brothers and sisters of white privilege to announce the end of helping those that don't wear Brooks Brothers and have yacht parties every Friday night. I am seeking radical change to our country. And I'm asking you to join me, so when you enter the polling booth on February 17th even though you may be hungover or impregnating some female, vote for Classic Conservative because we will make Atlasia rad! Now my friends, we have a bunch of beer in the back of this beautiful mansion so grab some and grab some girls while you are at it!

[Santander]

Endorsed while wearing my made in the USA BB ESF oxford shirt and Allen Edmonds for BB Strands!!!

[Classic Conservative]

ARE YOU AN ENEMY? IF SO WELCOME TO YOUR NEW HOME!

East Lansing, Michigan

     Settle down, settle down. We will have more beer after this small speech. My friends, I have recently been studying a wonderful issue with my most dearly lavenous friend, Smilo of Philadelphia. This issue is a way to get rid of the cucks in our country at the same time as creating thousands of brand new jobs and getting rid of environmental hazards like mercury. If elected, I will implement a plan to convert all factories that made products with mercury to gulags. We need to ship every crazy feminist who is lining our streets talking about killing their goddamn babies and put them in these gulags. This will create thousands of jobs in our poor rural areas of Atlasia including West Virginia and Alaska. These jobs will be high paying jobs with the requirement that you can make sure that the prisoners are working. We will also be cleaning our country through the hard labor of our enemies. Now you may go back to the beautiful ladies back there and drink some more liquor. But make sure on February 17th, to go and vote for Classic Conservative to make our country rad!

[LLR]

I think it's clear that anyone who uses "cucks" in a campaign speech is unfit to serve

[Classic Conservative]

Rallygoers at Classic Conservative Rally in Pass Christian

Thank y'all for coming out here this fine afternoon. As you know, my name is Classic and I have been a strong social conservative and economically libertarian voice in my time here in Atlasian politics. I am running on a platform on regional rights and I am fully supporting a socially conservative agenda, that will fight the reds up in Nyman. As you know, I am a proud Christian and I spread the Gospel of Jesus throughout the land. I will push for Christian values like banning abortion and promoting a Christian lifestyle. A few of my main policy goals include the following:

1. Ban Sanctuary Cities in Dixie
2. Ban Abortion as much as possible
3. Appoint a commission on how to accept persecuted Christians into the south.
4. A regional bathroom bill, that protects our youth and women.
5. Promote jobs in the energy industry and bring manufacturing back to the south.
6. Protect the South against radical Islamic terrorism and support conservative parties across the globe.
7. Ban euthanisa.

Thank you and I hope to earn your vote.

[Unconditional Surrender Truman]

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Are you calling DFW a communist?

[(Still) muted by Kalwejt until March 31]

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Are you calling DFW a communist?

-Someone who supports Kasich is basically Trotsky.

[JustinTimeCuber]

As you know, I am a proud Christian and I spread the Gospel of Jesus throughout the land.

1. Ban Sanctuary Cities in Dixie

can't help but lol

[Classic Conservative]

As you know, I am a proud Christian and I spread the Gospel of Jesus throughout the land.

1. Ban Sanctuary Cities in Dixie

can't help but lol

Good sir, I do not see what is funny, we must both praise the lord with one hand and keep the illegals out with the other.

[President of the great nation of 🏳️‍⚧️]

4. A regional bathroom bill, that protects our youth and women.

I have a question, Classic. I'm both a youth and a woman. How can a bill forcing me to use the wrong restroom protect me?

[Wisconsin+17]

If you're actually a woman why would the bathroom issue affect you?

[Unconditional Surrender Truman]

If you're actually a woman why would the bathroom issue affect you?

Because some people are silly and think they know more about Peebs than Peebs does.

[President of the great nation of 🏳️‍⚧️]

Because the only reason why I would get sex-reassignment surgery is to walk into ladies' bathrooms and abuse women.
And besides, I never see anyone fuming over a trans man using the men's room.
Ninja'd, Truman also nailed it.

[JustinTimeCuber]

"I really want to stalk little girls in a bathroom. Unfortunately, SB 347 is about to be passed, and when that happens stalking little girls will become illegal" is the bizarre characterization of trans women by social conservatives


also then there's this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JS70gSukBa4

[Wisconsin+17]

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Well, I would think most women would have no issues going to the woman's room.

[JustinTimeCuber]

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Well, I would think most women would have no issues going to the woman's room.

unless you're a trans woman and are forced to go into the men's bathroom because "freedom"

[Wisconsin+17]

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Why have signs on the doors at all?

[JustinTimeCuber]

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Why have signs on the doors at all?

for the convinence of the 99.999% of people who just want to use the bathroom

[President of the great nation of 🏳️‍⚧️]

I know I'm a little biased, but I believe in a little thing called the honor system.

[IceAgeComing]

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Why have signs on the doors at all?

I agree; lots of places in Brussels don't bother or design their bathrooms differently so that most of the space is gender-neutral, and that seems to work.  Nice to see that we all agree!

[NeverAgain]

I am sick and tired of these rabid homosexuals/pedophilic liberals who are trying to support their rabid pro-equality agenda! God. I hope conservatives get in charge and we can stop inappropriate bathroom behavior! THINK OF THE CHILDREN!

[Mike Thick]

Do you really believe it's the Government's role to attempt to influence elections abroad? I support a decent amount of your platform, but this is a bit troubling, to say the least.

[Goldwater]

Do you really believe it's the Government's role to attempt to influence elections abroad? I support a decent amount of your platform, but this is a bit troubling, to say the least.

Really? "Support conservative parties across the globe" is the one thing here you have an issue with?

[Leinad]

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Why have signs on the doors at all?

My thoughts exactly!

It makes no sense, when we already have stalls that lock, to separate public bathrooms. The only real reason might be urinals, which I hate (it is a civilized society, we shouldn't be forced to pee out the open just because we can--I will stop short there before going on a rant, but seriously f*** urinals).

Also this to Ted:

Really? "Support conservative parties across the globe" is the one thing here you have an issue with?

[Unconditional Surrender Truman]

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Why have signs on the doors at all?

My thoughts exactly!

It makes no sense, when we already have stalls that lock, to separate public bathrooms. The only real reason might be urinals, which I hate (it is a civilized society, we shouldn't be forced to pee out the open just because we can--I will stop short there before going on a rant, but seriously f*** urinals).

I know! I have never understood why someone would walk into a restroom and think "Well, I could relieve myself from the comfort of this private stall, but I've always wanted to undo my pants in public."

Do you really believe it's the Government's role to attempt to influence elections abroad? I support a decent amount of your platform, but this is a bit troubling, to say the least.

Really? "Support conservative parties across the globe" is the one thing here you have an issue with?

I mean, when Classic says "conservative parties around the globe," he means Front National and AfD, so in that context I absolutely get where Ted is coming from.