The Comedy Goldmine

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

I'm sure Kim Jong Un will take heed of the opinion of a useless spammer on the internets and start holding free elections now.

Made my morning!

[Bleach Blonde Bad Built Butch Bodies for Biden]

There is a picture of me in the Ride-the-Turtle pose, but my friend is terrible at taking pictures, and it came out blurry.

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

bushie do you see yourself working more than 40 hours a week?

You bet.

[IceSpear]

Every hack political writer is working extra hard tonight, writing two articles for both outcomes.


We can look forward to reading articles tomorrow about what this race says about Ed Gillespie's chances.

[Mordecai]

I guess I'm just shocked that there are people in this country who would voluntarily remain in a McDonald's or any other fast food establishment for longer than 30 minutes.

Around here, the elderly Vietnamese people prefer Starbucks because they can get green tea and then sit on the patio all afternoon and smoke.

Interesting.  Denny's was the establishment of choice for upper-division undergraduates cramming for science and math exams back in the day.  If you ordered coffee, they'd refill it all night and let us smoke.  Basically, for a dollar we got unlimited coffee and all the free second-hand smoke we could possibly want, along with a place to spread out books and paper. 

Lately, McDonald's and Burger King are the only places I'd linger for more than an hour, and only then if they have a playplace.  In fact, if they have a playplace we sometimes go into them just for that.  I'll order a coffee or something small to legitimize our visit, but it's the playplace we're after.  There's one particularly inviting playplace at a McDonald's on Manheim Pike near the mall.  It has climbing tubes, slides, bouncers, air hockey, basketball, and electronic games.  They're all free for customers.  My son and I play air hockey there for 30 minutes at a stretch every time we go to that McDonalds, which is probably about three times per year.  A couple of times we even went there while we were waiting on the pizza we ordered at the Pizza Hut next door.  No one ever kicked us out. 

Until I got to this part I was under the impression that we had an "Uncle Tony in an Ice Cream Van" with us.

There's a five-dollar bill in my pocket, just enough for a six-piece mcnuggets happy meal.  My hands are full at the moment but if you could just reach down in there and get it--and I know your little hands are just about the right size for that--then you can have it.  

That sort of thing?  I actually hadn't thought of any of that till I read your post.  Wow, you're a dirty old man.  Bad influence.  And you're probably way too young to be such a nasty old fart, which means that by the time you are an old fart you'll be superbly dirty old man.

[Bacon King]

As Winston Churchill famously said, "Most quotes on the internet aren't completely accurate."

[Oakvale]

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

Damn, man, I just came here to post this.

[King]

It made sense when our political system was degenerating into one giant Tammany Hall, and industrialists like John D Rockefeller had fortunes worth between $400B and $600B, depending on the method used for estimation. The wealthiest 1% also tended to outlive the common man by 20 years. I can understand and appreciate populist progressivism during that era.

Today, our socio-economic problems are created by incompetent progressive regulators.

[Bleach Blonde Bad Built Butch Bodies for Biden]

FDR because of pretty much these comparisons where FDR dominates:

While Reagan was busy giving tax breaks to the wealthy that would "trickle down" to the poor and middle class, Roosevelt was dead, and had been for decades.

While Reagan was busy firing thousands of air traffic controllers for striking for better wages, FDR continued to decompose, perhaps gently rotating inside his coffin.

And while Reagan was busy secretly supplying weapons and aid to the Contras and even Osama Bin Laden, Roosevelt's ghost looked down from the heavens and shed a single tear.

ftfy

but yeah, roosevelt was easily better.

[DC Al Fine]

Why in the name of Christ is this on the 'Economics' board?

Because we're talking about curves.

[Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook]

My real life is rather different from what you see online.

In real life, I'm a spokesman for an ancient alien race known as the Shadows, who indoctrinated me after my capture on the planet Z'ha'dum.  Though outwardly polite and gracious, I represent a dangerous hidden agenda.

I can only hope that my associates never learn of my online life.  How would they react, if they knew that I spend hours posting about a presidential election in the United States set to take place two years hence, when said elections are a sham?  After all, my associates already covertly control all major Earth governments, and their power will only grow in the years to come.

[Antonio the Sixth]

Obviously a scam but so is religion so what does it matter anyway.

[MATTROSE94]

I think drawing a mustache on a baby is immoral but that doesn't stop me from doing it.

[NewYorkExpress]

The following exchange about Richard Nixon pretty much sums him up (and Oldiesfreak I guess)

I vote Neutral.  He was a pretty good president aside from Watergate, but I can't excuse his bad behavior either.

Other than that, how was the play, Mrs. Lincoln?

[King]

NewYorkExpress, if you don't mind me asking: do you write for Family Circus?

[Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook]

NewYorkExpress, if you don't mind me asking: do you write for Family Circus?

[Lief 🗽]

Family Circus is a great comic strip.

[Snowstalker Mk. II]

TIL Lief is a quaint grandmother.

[Joe Republic]

Family Circus is a great comic strip.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-coLK8q2ZD0&feature=player_detailpage#t=70

[NewYorkExpress]

NewYorkExpress, if you don't mind me asking: do you write for Family Circus?

I feel so unappreciated....

And no, I don't write, shill or otherwise promote anyone in particular, because if I did they're clearly not paying me enough.

[Bacon King]

re: family circus

http://www.nietzschefamilycircus.com/

[Antonio the Sixth]

ca. 1605:

You must be logged in to read this quote.

A knave; a rascal; an eater of broken meats; a
base, proud, shallow, beggarly, three-suited,
hundred-pound, filthy, worsted-stocking knave; a
lily-livered, action-taking knave, a whoreson,
glass-gazing, super-serviceable finical rogue;
one-trunk-inheriting slave; one that wouldst be a
bawd, in way of good service, and art nothing but
the composition of a knave, beggar, coward, pandar,
and the son and heir of a mongrel bitch: one whom I
will beat into clamorous whining, if thou deniest
the least syllable of thy addition.

Post Deleted for Personal Attack / Profanity with 10 (out of 10) infraction points
[/quote]

[True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자)]

Family Circus is a great comic strip.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-coLK8q2ZD0&feature=player_detailpage#t=70

That was a real shot in the arm.

[True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자)]

Godwin ought to become an infractable offense.

You know who else suggested new infractable offenses?  That's right….Hitler.