The Good Post Gallery

[Donerail]

Moreover, wishing a genocidal totalitarian dictatorship on one's own countrymen as opposed to a semi-authoritarian regime overseas is insane.

Yep.

[Kitteh]

Moreover, wishing a genocidal totalitarian dictatorship on one's own countrymen as opposed to a semi-authoritarian regime overseas is insane.

Yep.

Yep.

[Pheurton Skeurto]

Was going for the 'moderate hero' but it backfired

[Napoleon]

Is this nigga still alive?

EDIT: For the record, I'm Black, so I can say the word. Don't get any dumb ideas Inks. You ain't tryin me up.

[Napoleon]

Although Oak would start with a huge lead the public would get tired of his campaigning being just him complaining about how everything is awful and dumb. Then with Lief's gaffes, people would start to see the ticket as too elitist, and dangerous having lief anywhere near power should something happen to Oak.

Turn out ends up incredibly low with ~ 50,000 voters, the millions of others just giving up on Democracy altogether.  Snowden landslide

Weeks after the election the military industrial complex fearing loss of power works with high ranking generals and initiates a coup which overthrows the Republic and installs Oakvale and Leif as dictatorial heads of state. In the ensuing civil war the inevitably follows many flee to Canada or Mexico after the Great Oakenlief Genocide of libertarians, rich people, and perceived moderate heroes. After years of bloodshed peace is finally restored when foreign powers intervene and depose of the dictatorship.

[opebo]

The Adventures of Hobo Orgy Guy and Blondie

[Blondie sits in front of a campfire inside his dog house.  A hobo steps through the dog house doorway, and joins him at the fire.]

Hobo: I hope you don't mind if I take shelter in here?

Blondie: I'm just a dog.  Who am I to complain?

Hobo: Fair enough.

Blondie: But if you really want shelter, you should knock on the door of the adjacent mobile home.  You know, a mobile home for humans.  This is a dog house, genius.

Hobo: The Bushie family?  I can't stand them.  You see, the kid in that family, BushOklahoma, had abandoned his house, and it turned into a great location for group sex for myself and my associates.  However, we were found out, and the police got involved, and the whole thing was a mess.  BushOK actually moved back here from out of state, and began regular patrols of the property.  I mean, he started driving by the house for a few minutes at least once a week.  How are we supposed to ensure our privacy when he's harassing us like that?  Ever sense then, I've been trying to kill him, or at least maim him, by dropping rocks off of nearby buildings.

Blondie: So, you know the Bushie family as well?  I've actually been adopted by them.  It's a rather unfortunate state of affairs though.  I show up here a few weeks ago, looking for food and shelter.  I figure I was owned by some other family, but I don't know.  I was only a six week old puppy.  What the hell do I know?  Can you remember what happens from one day to the next when you're six weeks old?  Anyway, I show up, figure they'll return me to my owner.  Seems like they make a halfhearted attempt to find my owner.  Next thing I know, I'm being left out here in the heat all day with minimal shelter and very little human companionship.  On top of that, they start calling me J.J. for no good reason.  I'd already learned that my name was Blondie.  You're going to confuse a puppy like that?  So they won't let inside their mobile home, and they only come out briefly each day to throw a ball for me to retrieve.  Sometimes the old man walks me, but it's not much.  It's gotten worse, since BushOK left for his week in Kenya.  Hope he comes back soon, and makes a real effort to find my original owner.

Hobo: I see.  Sounds like we both have reasons to hold a grudge against the Bushie family.

Blondie: Indeed we do.......Can I ask you three more questions?

Hobo: Sure, no problem.  I've got all the time in the world.

Blondie: OK, well, I'm not sure I know how to put this.  But how do you explain what's happening to you right now: a talking dog, a campfire inside a dog house which should not logically be large enough to fit a camp fire, a dog, and a human?

Hobo: Oh, yeah.  That.  Well, I'm pretty high right now, so nothing would surprise me.  In any case, if I can't explain it, can you?  What's your explanation for how you can talk, and why the dog house is so big on the inside, like the Tardis or something?

Blondie: Don't know.  I'm just a dog.  How am I supposed to know how the world works?  Anyway, my second question is: What's your name?  I told you mine was Blondie.  How about you?

Hobo: I don't actually know my real name.  I have amnesia.  That is, everything before about 2008 is kind of a fog.  Tried to find out who I was, but I lost the will to keep looking for clues, became destitute, and found release in the orgies I participate in.  Anyway, the only name I know is the one I've taken on for myself, Hog.

Blondie: Well Hog, nice to meet you.

[Blondie puts out his paw to shake, and Hog takes it and greets him.]

Hog: So what's your third question?

Blondie: You asked if you could take shelter in here.  Well, shelter from what, specifically?  Just an "I'm homeless, and I need some place to sleep" kind of shelter, or are you taking refuge from something in particular?

Hog: You mean you don't know?  There's a tornado coming.  Can't you hear the winds?  You're a dog, so I thought you'd have super hearing or something.

Blondie: A tornado?!?

[Blondie starts digging furiously in the dirt, which sprays onto the fire, and puts it out.]

Hog: What are you doing?

Blondie: [Blondie continues to dig as he responds.]  Digging.  If there's a tornado on the way, we have to get to low ground.  There's nowhere around where there's low ground.  So we make some low ground by digging.  I mean, I'm a dog.  It's the only good response I have in a crisis like this.

[Hog peers out the dog house door at the approaching storm.]

Hog: It's too late for that now.

[Moments later, the dog house is swept up by the approaching winds, and launched high into the air.  Blondie and Hog hang onto the house for dear life.

As they're sucked into the vortex, they look out at the debris flying through the air.  They see mobile homes, and what look like human bodies, both dead and alive.

Nearby, they see what looks like Inks riding a bicycle in the air.  It slowly morphs into an image of Inks riding a broomstick and cackling.  It looks remarkably like the 3:08 mark in this clip, but with the human characters as male rather than female.

Finally, the dog house, with Blondie and Hog inside, crashes to the ground, and Hog loses consciousness.

An undetermined amount of time later, Hog wakes up to Blondie licking his face.]

Hog: What are you doing?

Blondie: Waking you up.  Sorry for the crude method, but I'm a dog.  It's the only way I know how.

Hog: No sweat.  [Hog stands up and looks around.]  How long was I out?

Blondie: Don't know.  But look!  [He points.]  The dog house is still in relatively good shape.  And the tornado's gone.  Looks like it wasn't as destructive as we thought.  And we haven't even been displaced that far from our original location.  The Bushie family trailer home is right there, just 100 yards or so away.

Good morning.

[Bushie appears behind them.  Blondie and Hog are startled at Bushie's surprise appearance.  But Hog quickly picks up the nearest rock and tosses it at Bushie's head.  The rock miraculously flies right through Bushie's head and he's unharmed.]

Oh, throwing rocks at me won't hurt.  I mean, I know you're my friend and you're just looking out for me, even though you just tried to kill me.  It doesn't bother me though.  I don't take it personally.  But you can't hurt me because I'm not really here.  I'm a holographic projection from the future, and can only communicate with you through these text boxes.  I've come here from the future so I can help you.

TO BE CONTINUED....

[Okay, maybe Mike Johnson is a competent parliamentarian.]

I get to be the moderate hero and inform you that you are both wrong!

DC:  The reason why Wikipedia is highlighting those positions of Mussolini, while he was still a member of the Socialist Party, is because they are ironic in light of his movement's close ties with the Roman Catholic Church later on.  The Nazis were indeed much more sympathetic to atheism or neopaganism and hostile to preexisting religion.

Hockeydude:  You are shifting the goalposts and creating a tautology in a ridiculous manner, essentially saying "if we define social conservatism as fascism then fascism is socially conservative."  Fascism and Naziism were anti-traditionalist often to the point of absurdity; witness the enthusiasm for eugenics, the plans to demolish and rebuild Berlin or to pave over the canals of Venice, Hitler's plans to purge the former nobility, the Nazi effort to make everyone use Futura instead of Fraktur, etc. etc. etc.

[opebo]

More moralistic new left nonsense that can be safely ignored, don't worry.

[Grumpier Than Uncle Joe]

As his plane landed in Nairobi, a small tear trickled down Bushie's eye. Finally he could live his dream, to take care of his new children. God had rewarded him for his faith with a change in Kenyan policy regarding adoption; a single man could live with them, under the condition that he live with them in the bush for one year.

Taking a Jeep, he drove away from the capital for several hours until he reached the central village of the Baraka tribe. As his engine revved in the center of the village, several members of the tribe, including his two new children, came out to greet them.

"Would you like to buy some insurance?", Bushie asked.

The tribe stared at him puzzlingly. Suddenly, Bushie heard the beating of drums. From his rudimentary knowledge of the Baraka tribe, it meant that it was time for the hunt. Bushie took an extra spear and followed the men of the tribe onto the path through the grasses. While the strong, experienced hunters quickly noticed signs of a herd of antelope up ahead, Bushie lagged behind, huffing and puffing after the first two minutes of walking. But from somewhere in the bushes to his left, he heard what sounded like the squeals of a small animal. Bushie, despite his exhaustion, walked off the path to see what it was. Brushing away the leaves with his spear, he came across the animal; a single lion cub. It appeared to be distressed.

"There, there", cooed Bushie, picking up and stroking the cub. "Calm down, there's no need to be scared." But the lion cub only became more frightened, and its calls loudened. Bushie continued petting the cub, hoping it would calm down. Suddenly, the cub turned its head and jumped out of Bushie's arms. Bushie looked over his shoulder, and in a flash, he was bowled over by a lioness. Despite his struggles, the mother easily pinned him down, and clamped her jaws down on his throat. But this first bite only stabbed into some neck fat. The second bite directly severed the windpipe, and the lioness held until Bushie's struggles ended. She roared, signaling to the rest of her pride that prey had been killed.

The pride would eat well tonight.

(Note: I had to. I pre-emptively apologize and encourage you all to obtain a copy of the story before the mods take it down)

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

I just don't get it.

Why do these people hate sex ed so much?

It empowers women.

Why beat around the bush or get bogged down in meaningless analysis?  Three words is all ya need.  Very nice, Lief. 

[Oldiesfreak1854]

Over: Independents and the ever-disappearing moderate Republican
Under: Far-leftists and youths

[Oldiesfreak1854]

To be fair with Oldies, Spongebob does suck.

[Antonio the Sixth]

Oh God...

[Oldiesfreak1854]

In defence of Thatcher and Reagan, they didn't morally agree with the Apartheid State and did think the world would be better off without it. They allowed it to comfortably exist  unsanctioned as it was an ally and a lesser evil than a probably Soviet dominated egalitarian South Africa. They worked to weaken this "reason to be" and once Eastern Europe broke away the system disintegrated and Nelson Mandela was released and elected president  their theory was largely vindicated.
Also it's probably wise to note that while Mandela is indeed a great man the ANC as a whole are largely a horrible party (not just from a right wing perspective but from a progressive-liberal one) which is essentially not less terroristic than Provo Sinn Fein. Says a lot that their biggest rival isn't the Nations, but the Democratic Alliance, a centre-left social-market-liberal party in the Liberal International,  lead by a racial-equality activist. While better off than Zimbabwe, SA hasn't made anywhere near the economic development progress it should, thanks to high levels of corruption and possibly the malign presence of the Communist party in government.

[Antonio the Sixth]

OLDIES FOR GOD'S SAKE STOP POSTING IN THIS THREAD THANKS

[FEMA Camp Administrator]

Hey, Tony, calm down there for a second. If it weren't for him, I wouldn't have made it in here at all (Thanks, forum).

[courts]

     Discriminatory policies should have no place in the land, regardless of who benefits from them.

But is SCOTUS correct in saying that diversity on campus can have an educational benefit, and if there is no other way to achieve it race can be used as a factor?

Some schools, particularly some public universities, have a policy that just about anyone with a HS diploma can gain admission. Those students aren't guaranteed success, just an opportunity. If HS scores are less of a factor, can diversity be a factor?

Why should 'diversity' be the goal? The way I understood it, affirmative action was intended to give black Americans (whom the program only originally applied to) the chance to get into college. The shift in the focus towards making college campuses a place that are 'diverse' for the sake of diversity undermines the entire original purpose of affirmative action, which was designed to promote upward mobility for black Americans. The diversity argument, more than anything else, is a shift away from that to a kind of 'admissions should enrich white students' experience' policy, rather than one that actually promotes upward mobility. Essentially, college admissions are designed so that wealthy white kids can say that they have a 'black friend', while the educational benefit toward black or other minority students is completely ignored.

Again, the only people whom affirmative action benefits are wealthy whites and wealthy minorities, who can continue to use it as leverage to perpetuate class rule. Having token black, Latino, and Asian members of the governing class helps expand the American Dream myth to those communities, as if saying 'Look at [blank]! He or She went to college, and so can you!' while forever moving the goalposts to make it impossible. And of course this kind of affirmative action policy totally ignores the vast majority of the American poor, who are, of course, white.

A much more radical solution to this problem would just be to take the money out of higher education and let everyone go based upon their own merits. But then that would deprive the ruling class its inherent advantage of access to education, so forgive me if I don't see that happening in the near future.

[TNF]

Maybe I recognize that there's a lot of gray area between North Korean police state and lawless maximum freedom anarchy, that the government needs to constantly balance privacy and security, and finally that the government knowing you called your friend is not really a big deal and doesn't really infringe on anyone's liberty/privacy.

But no, the correct answer must be that I just love sucking Obama's cock.

fair enough. but there's an awful lot of 'what ifs' here.like say, what if your friends happen to all be known homosexuals? or you know people with a criminal record? what if you made calls to something like alcoholics anonymous? or a suicide hotline? or phone sex hotline for that matter? how do you know the above won't be used as blackmail or to otherwise discredit you if you step out of line? and what about protecting confidentiality for press sources?

now obviously i'm pretty far from a libertarian. but it doesn't exactly take a genius to see how this sort of program could be massively abused. not to mention the government's position is basically a classic 'heads i win, tails you lose type' kind of fallacious argument. they don't have to actually prove they've foiled any terror plots, they can just say they have but that's classified. but if there is a successful terror attack then obviously they need more power to stop future ones from occurring.

that said on some level i feel the typical civil libertarian position on this is somewhat naive. i keep asking myself all kinds of questions on this honestly. like, what exactly is a warrant other than the government asking itself permission to invade people's privacy after all? do people really expect the government to stop doing this even if the courts do say spying is unconstitutional? and if it wasn't the government doing this, what about your boss or companies data mining your information? would that be okay (a lot of libertarians would say yes...)? is this sort of thing even preventible given that video surveillance technology and spyware and all of that keeps getting more advanced every year? it just feels like anyone that cares about these things is in a losing position by default.

[H. Ross Peron]

OLDIES FOR GOD'S SAKE STOP POSTING IN THIS THREAD THANKS

[SPC]

http://www.rawstory.com/rs/2013/06/25/mccain-well-make-border-with-mexico-look-like-the-berlin-wall

What a sad, miserable, washed up joke of a man.

[Oldiesfreak1854]

Some of the most intelligent writing in human history, or some of the most idiotic trash every written in human history. Take your pick.

Which is which?

[traininthedistance]

Oh God.

This is one of my problems with Atlas (and with the news media, though that's a whole 'nother rant). Instead of discussing what Senator Davis did or the merits of the bill she was filibustering, we make a thread for whether she's physically attractive. Unless we make equivalent threads like this for male politicians, this is really a sexist double standard to judge female politicians on their appearance. I'd have expected political junkies to be the sorts who could think with their brains as opposed to just their cocks.

[Napoleon]

Like any living concept it has no concrete meaning from one person, one area, one issue, or one time to the next. Trying to draw definite ideological lines and labeling them is an obsession this forum has that befuddles me. It's like a never ending identity crisis.

 "You believe in X but you also believe in Y. Are you a member of the set of Real Conservatives? Perhaps you are a subset of the Real Conservative set Rockefeller. But even if you say you are in the Rockefeller subset will people know you believe in X but also Y? They might assume you believe in Z! We must be more specific."

Of course we all have our own subset, Ourselves. And because of that trying to find the common variables within an infinite number of sets is tedious, useless, and just intellectual masturbation. Even if you succeed in defining every ideology perfectly, it's still only useful in a vacuum.

To summarize, American conservatism has no real definition. Even if it did, it wouldn't be accurate or useful in the real world. So stop trying to label and categorise everything please, Atlas Forum, and get back to making Hillary vs. Chuck Norris election result maps or whatever. You're better at that.

[tik 🪀✨]

Aw, I'm tickled Thank you, Napoleon.

[Oldiesfreak1854]

People are ignorant and it fits a narrative.