The Kalwejt Foundation for the Promotion of Atlas Hilarity

[morgieb]

Best debut post of all-time?

Sounds like he took the Show Me State a bit too literally

[morgieb]

Perhaps too easy, but still it's a great effort all round:

Okay guys, here are my ratings and #analysis. I worked really hard on these, so I hope you all like them.

AZ - Safe D, Queen of Arizona Kyrsten Sinema would defeat God himself in an election here.
CA - Lean Feinstein, De Leon will win 47 year old inner city Los Angeles gay Latino businessmen, but will it be enough?
CT - Lean D, Malloy will drag down Murphy.
DE- Lean R, a Gravis poll shows Carper is in deep trouble.
FL - Safe D. Nelson was an astronaut.
HI - Toss Up. Hirono has cancer, also Republicans just improved on the Reuters generic ballot.
IN - Safe D. One word: Trafalgar. Also, Braun is a much worse candidate than Mourdock.
ME - Toss Up. Maine swung to Trump.
MD - Lean D. imo chelsea manning might run as an independent and hurt cardin imo.
MA - Lean R. Warren is an underperformer and Charlie Baker coattails will ensure the end of her political career.
MI - Likely R. James will win 90% of the black vote because he's black. Stabenow will need to run up the score with racist whites to compensate.
MN - Toss Up. #SmithMoreVulnerableThanTester. Also, MN almost voted Trump.
MS - Lean D. MS is very sexist (see 2016) and will therefore vote for Espy.
MO - Likely D. Only not safe D because Hawley works out at the gym and this might sway some female voters imo.
MT - Super Safe D. Every single citizen of the state will vote for Jon Tester, as agreed upon by the Montana Constitution and by every citizen who resides there, otherwise they face exile. also rosendale weak candidate imo.
NE - Safe R. Fischer will win by 50 points because a line on a Politico article told me she would.
NV - Super Safe R. Unbeatable Titan Dean Heller was unstoppable, but imo weak candidate jacky rosen only sealed the dems fate here imo.
NJ - Safe R. Menendez is corrupt and New Jersey HATES corruption.
NM - Likely R. Because of unbeatable titan Gary Johnson. Only keeping it at likely R rather than safe R because we don't know if Mick Rich will drop out yet.
NY - Lean D. NYC will get vengeance for Al Franken by voting Republican, but she can balance them out with Upstate Racists. imo she should be happy she's not facing strong candidate wendy long or else this would be at least lean r imo.
ND - Likely D. Retail politics and tariffs.
OH - Safe D. #populists
PA - Lean R. Barletta is very Trumpish and don't forget Trump won PA.
RI - Toss Up. Rhode Island swung R in 2016.
TN - Safe D. Unbeatable Titan Phil Bredesen won every county in 2006 and will do so again.
TX - Safe D. Texas swung to Hillary Clinton and Ted Cruz was a #NeverTrumper which will hurt him with the base. O'Rourke's great campaign and good looks will cause him to dominate the 39 year old yoga practicing soap opera watching suburban demographic.
UT - Toss Up. Romney is an etch a sketch and also said 47%, plus this state swung hard D in 2016. imo if hatch was the nominee this would be safe d imo.
VT - Lean R. Rs hard good primary turnout, and Scott's coattails will drag down the old socialist Bernie for good.
VA - Toss Up. VIRGINIA IS STILL A SWING STATE! BARBARA COMSTOCK WOULD'VE MADE THIS RACE SAFE R IN A CLINTOOOOONNNN MIDTERRRRRMMMMMM.
WA - Lean D. This state is very white, so Cantwell needs to watch her back.
WV - Safe D. See Ohio.
WI - Safe D. Wisconsin is back to titanium D after a brief flirtation with Trumpism. Evers coattails will propel Baldwin to victory.
WY - Lean D. This might seem hackish, but do you guys really think the blue wave won't hit Wyoming? Give me a break!

Any thoughts?

[morgieb]

[morgieb]

I guess several pages in we will now need this, even if it is technically not a Bronz thread

[morgieb]

Lol I’ve never seen a politicians this underwater (out side of a cult)

Ted Kennedy was underwater that one time

[morgieb]

Po

"Po" means "ass" in German.