Comedy Goldmine & Robin

[Keystone Phil]

From a political standpoint, I have now seen it all.

I have argued with you on virtually everything, and disagree with you on virtually nothing, but glad to see you back.

Glad to be back, Smash. Glad to be back.

[Keystone Phil]

Let's face it, Romney is the only one of the major contenders of any substance and who is made of Presidential material.

He has the royal jelly so to speak.

I'm sorry but what the hell is "royal jelly?"

[Keystone Phil]

He always has such a smooth way of breaking the bad news...

Hate to tell you, but based on your FB, you have the look of a 45 year old child molester. 

[Keystone Phil]

Joe can be such an asshole and it's hilarious...

Well, in places other than Oklahoma, it's uncommon for people to be using computers built earlier than 1993, so I understand your problem.

[Keystone Phil]

I do hope you're not serious.

I am serious, and don't call me "I do hope".

(OK, maybe I can't pull off jokes like Leslie Nielsen.)

[Keystone Phil]

Some of the strangest analysis I have seen in awhile...

Pawlenty's bigger problem is that he looks way too much like he could be a European Prime Minister for the GOP electorate's taste.  It undermines American exceptionalism.  I predict that in debates Palin will talk slowly and loudly to him to imply to viewers he can't understand the language.  Not that anyone can understand Palin's language.  Seriously, though, maybe this is a big edge for Thune.

[Keystone Phil]

I can't tell if he's serious or not...

You can tell BRTD isn't really involved in politics.

Uh, do you have any clue how much doorknocking and phonebanking I did this season? Probably not as much as you (as I have a non-political job taking up much of my time as well), but a hell of a lot. I even woke up before 8AM on Election Day for that.

[Keystone Phil]

In context...

Can you imagine how offended the neighbor will be by bratwurst?

[Keystone Phil]

Not a place for posts from Atlasia.

The biggest joke board on the forum certainly deserves to have its posts here.

[Keystone Phil]

To me fellow Republicans, the posters dumb enough to identify with the Democrat Party have got Christie pegged correctly.

The guy enjoyed his month in the son.  It's all downhill from here.  Everyone has moved onto propping up Herman Cain now.

[Keystone Phil]

I'm glad you enjoy having the moral compass of a three-year-old.

Speaking of age, weren't you finger-painting around the time Kerry and Bush were debating?

[Keystone Phil]

I had always thought the swearing-in was January 3, but the session didn't actually begin until January 5.

[Keystone Phil]

Yates, I hope you get cancer and die.

Thank you, Sam.  I have reported this post and ask that you kindly refrain from contacting me or directing comments towards me again.

You think this is over, f****t?

[Keystone Phil]

I never claimed to have the Mountain time zone's first orgasm of the new year, although it might have been close if such records were kept. 

[Keystone Phil]

Horrible news for Rick Santorum...

I'm sorry that we don't believe in this guy like you do Phil, and I'll be the first to admit I was a fool if he actually wins a state in the primary, but nobody thinks he has a ligament chance to win something this time around

[Keystone Phil]

Bandit is back and just as crazy. Talking about Palin...

Wait, I forgot. The media likes her.

Since when?

Ever since anybody outside Alaska knew who she was.

I think that just naturally happens when you're picked as the running mate for a major party Presidential  nominee. Just a hunch though.

Then why does it only happen for Republicans?

[Keystone Phil]

Yeah, he killed 3 Goldmines in a row.   It was a record.

Anyway... more postings from Jokelahoma:

I heard a good line last night on the Chinese head of state's visit to the White House. To paraphrase "Tomorrow night's official state dinner will be catered by Panda Express."  For those of you who aren't familiar with Panda Express, it is a Chinese fast food chain.  I thought that was pretty funny!!

BushOK was the only person to make that funny.

[Keystone Phil]

Santorum was not elected to the House.

[Keystone Phil]

Pbrower does it again but this one really has me scratching my head. Talking about Santorum...

He's an Italian-American, so he ought to have some affinities to Latin-American voters. (Uh, no, Mexican-Americans, Cuban-Americans, and Puerto Ricans don't generally consider themselves to have strong affinities to Italy).

So he totally made up this idea that people think Santorum being an Italian - American means he has some connection to Latinos and then goes on to state that that's obviously not true. It has gotten pretty bad for this guy that he knows has to make up ridiculous points to discredit in order to appear intelligent.

[Keystone Phil]

Florida school are terrible.

[Keystone Phil]

Catholics are Christian. And I say this as probably the most anti-Catholic person on the forum.

No, Being Catholic is the same part as Christianity, not being Christian. But thats all I'm going to say, because this is for funny stuff, not your rants.

Dude, are you being serious? I'm really worried that you are.

By the way, nothing topics Naso's claim that he is "Half Christian, half Catholic."

[Keystone Phil]

Wasn't he also once asked something like if he was "Episcopalian, Methodist, Presbyterian or something else?" and his response was "Uh, the one that starts with the E."

Yes, the literal response was, "Uh...the one with the 'E.'"