Pelosi didn't ask the military to remove Trump from office = No coup.
Strictly speaking, she asked the military to refuse carrying out certain orders from Trump. That's asking them to not to do something instead of doing something.
But I understand that you're post was meant as a "both sides do it!" construction.
Read it again.
It says right there Pelosi asked for Trump to be removed from the chain of command. That is not military refusing orders, that would be a coup.
How is that anywhere close to asking for a coup? She just asked if they can make sure he doesn’t start a war because that’s a real threat with him considering what happened on the sixth.
