How would you react to this story (see 1st post)

[angus]

what do you do?

I tell her to get a fucking life.  First, the guy might be a Hindu.  Second, it ain't butter, it's partially-hydrogenated cottonseed oil.  No cows were harmed during the making of your breakfast.  Third, WTF?  Really?  You eat bleached wheat, fake butter, and hormone-injected chicken deep fried in trans fat, in your car as you're driving to work and you actually want people to feel your pain?  Yeah, we feel your pain.  It's called hypertension.

And who the fuck wrote this?!  The by-line says "Good Morning America" but behavior is spelled "behaviour."  Yeah, that's more like, Good Morning Liverpool.  Doesn't that paper even have editors?

Highly suspect.  I'd tell the bitch to get bent.  And I'm talking mostly about the writer of the piece, but while we're at it, the woman who eats bad food while driving and has the unmitigated gaul to judge others can probably use a thorough bending as well.  I'd like to see a picture of her.  Her ass is probably about as wide as my sofa.  It'll take more than one little hackenkreutz to blanket that one.


Oh, I guess I didn't answer the question:  the first option.  I'm a big fan of mayo, and when I'm in the mood for McDonald's food I really don't linger.  It's like finding a Chicken McNugget shaped like Elvis.  I'd spend about a microsecond pondering the deeper meaning of it, but I don't think I'd waste time showing it to the manager.  In the end, I'd just slather it in mayonnaise and choke it down. 

[angus]

I keep little packages of condiment mayonnaise with me regularly.  Seems like folks always provide other condiments but not mayonnaise.  Just yesterday we were invited to a "picnic, bring a covered dish, hotdogs and burgers will be provided."  As I suspected, the people who organized it provided buns, burgers, lettuce, tomato slices, pickles, mustard, and even ketchup.  I haven't much use for ketchup, but I appreciate the other dressings for the grilled meats.  But why not mayo?  Well, I know the answer.  Unlike lettuce, pickles, tomato slices, ketchup, and mustard, mayonnaise cannot handle hours of direct sunlight.  Well, it can, but your sh**t will be liquid if you eat it.  Most folks' anyway.  I think I've developed a bit of a tolerance.  I can even eat "macaroni salad" that has been sitting out, unrefrigerated, all day in the hot sun.  Or maybe it's that I just don't mind a little escherichia coli with my lunch.  In any case, I do enjoy a healthy dollop of mayonnaise on my hot dogs, corn dogs, hamburgers, tater tots, french fries, and corn-on-the cob.  It's not bad on pear salad either.  I do appreciate your post, though.  People divorce over these things.  I'm not a big fan of divorce, in fact I'm very much against it, which is why I posted in another thread that folks ought to live together a very, very long time before marrying.  I once broke up with a woman who actually preferred Miracle Whip.  I could put up with most of her other shortcomings, but the thought of Miracle Whip on my sandwich was too much.  I wouldn't mind the shape that she spreads it.  Star of David.  Hackenkreutz.  Stars'n'Bars.  Even a peace sign.  To me, it's not the shape with which you dribble on the condiment, but the condiment that you're dribbling on the bun.  She liked Miracle Whip, and I liked mayonnaise.  Sure, miracle whip, like mustard, holds up better under the summer sun, but there's really no substitute for mayonnaise.  We just couldn't come to a mutual understanding, so we went our separate ways.  No grudges held.  Well, okay, there were a few grudges, but not over condiments.  I have always respected that there are two kinds of people:  those who prefer mayonnaise, and those who prefer some other condiment.