I picked Salt Lake City. Vegas is for vacationing.
Learn how to fake a smile for photos! You are bordered by outrageous women in an attempt to solidify society's expectations that you find said women to be no more than symbols. Yet you don't seem satisfied - you have a wry smirk on your face that tells only one story - and that story involves pretending that you appreciate your aunt's taste in obscure dairy products that are nearly spoiled.
You are the Atlas's most prolific purveyor of the new dichotomy: Deeply Unsettling / Accidentally Hilarious.
Poll
