Update Season X - "It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas Vol. I."

[memphis]

The interesting thing is that if Bushie's actually believes his death probability numbers are real, that's probably why he think his policy is so great.  At a 35% chance of death in his 30 years after purchasing a 30-term life insurance policy, if you ignore inflation and potential gains from investment (the former assumption is faulty but the latter is not, considering who we're talking about), he should actually be willing to pay anything under $194/month for a $200,000 policy.

Yes, you have to present value everything. A dollar out now is worth more than a dollar received 15 years from now. I make no financial decision myself without doing a present value analysis, using a discount rate appropriate for the risk involved in the investment. Otherwise, it's like flying an unpressurized plane at night in a storm over the Himalayas without instruments.

I did this sort of thing when deciding when to start taking social security. It turns out that by waiting, and factoring in appropriate actuarial assumptions, I can make about an 8% annualized return on each dollar I forego receiving between age 62 and age 70, with essentially no risk.  That makes waiting worthwhile.

Right, although the only real factor in Bushie's discount rate would be inflation, since I don't see him doing any investing (even CDs... the man has no money). My calculations were simply to illustrate a general point.

He has a lot of high interest credit card debt. The time value of money is much more critical for him than any savvy investor who is trying to squeeze an extra percent here or there

[memphis]

Green beans? Are you feeling okay Bushie?

Don't worry. I'm sure they were the canned variety. Little salty and mushy green cylinders, bearing no resemblance to actual food.

[memphis]

No cake related migraine?

[memphis]

yo Bushie, how much credit card debt do you have?  what's your minimum payment look like?

One card is completely paid off, another will be in October, and the third has$11,000.  Minimum on that is
usually $250.

Jesus tapdancing Christ! And Inks didn't think the timing of your money was consrquential. You're probably dropping $2,000/year in credit card interest.

[memphis]

Why not just leave the tree up year round? Would save a lot of trouble. And I find the idea of staring at tv for 15 hours a day nauseating, but what people do in their off time is their own business. Just don't insult my intelligence by turning around and saying that you didn't have time. You have more time than anybody on the planet.

[memphis]

Who cares about the cruise scam.. it sounds like he was offered some open buffet cruise where they could go anytime and anywhere for $800 and took it, and it ended up not being a real thing.

Let's hear more and encourage him to go after Allison. It will give him something to do!

He'll be in even more debt.  I may be critical of him, but at least I offer rational advice.  Pursuing a girlfriend (or anything that will increase his spending) is not what he should be doing right now.

Maybe Bushie is angling to be a house husband (pity he can't cook or clean worth a damn).  All she needs is money and/or a good job. Yes, I know, I know.

Nothing wrong with running a household, provided one does it well. Especially when children are involved, cooking and cleaning and shopping and laundry and fixing things and managing finances and so on is a much harder job than most working people realize. It's shame that Americans generally don't recognize the above chores combined do in fact constitute a job, not so different than managing a small business. I'm not convinced Bushie would actually do that job, either, but I wanted to get that off my chest. A big problem in the US is that we are all trying to do all of those things in addition to our 9-5 and it's all just too much to manage and our quality of life suffers, as does our job performance and home life. And if the woman is better at bringing home the bacon, and the man is better at the domestic side, that's supercool with me too. But, as somebody who has seen too many people try to do everything, I can tell you anecdotally that division of labor, in whatever way works best for an individual household, makes a helluva lot of sense.
Also, I live in the South, and I can tell you that sharing a car can work. It's not always convenient and requires a lot of planning and patience, but it can save a tremendous amount of money, as well as being better for the planet. I know it wouldn't work for everybody, but I wish more people would at least consider it. Unfortunately, people are so caught up in how things are "supposed to" be that they overlook opportunities.

[memphis]

Inks, you're right, I have no money to support a girlfriend right now.

Good GOD man, you don't support a gf.   

Yeah, he already eats out for all his meals anyway, so I'm not sure what all these additional expenses would even be.

I have lived off $200 or less per month for food.  Case in point: Utah.  I've done it before and I can do it again.  It's called a grocery store.  Believe it or not, I know how to shop.

But you don't know how to cook so you end up eating Hot Pockets and Doritos every day. Sigh...

[memphis]

Sure, cars are expensive, but I think also a major factor is the resources available to you.  Car pooling, as Memphis mentioned, is a great idea.  The only problem with my current situation, is none of my classmates live close to where I do, so that's not really an option.  I live in an Oklahoma City suburb, but the mass transit doesn't get out this far and neither do the Metro Tech school buses.  So, that option is out.  Now, when I get a job, I will likely live in an area that is close a bus stop, so it is possible that I could take the bus to work.  I'll just have to wait and see until next Spring.

I didn't mention carpooling, though that's not a terrible idea, if it can be worked out. My point was that it is often feasible for two people in the same household to share a car. It's frequently inconvenient and requires a lot of planning, which is something that you seem to enjoy. The payoff is in the greatly reduced costs. Again, it's a pain and not for everybody. But obviously, you guys don't need to have three cars.

[memphis]

Even the super duper "Titanium" model has an MSRP of $29,100. Did you guys get $6,000 in undercoating protection? There is no reason to have a car loan for that long, ever. I know most people, unfortunately, can't afford to pay for a car in cash, but 3 years is the absolute longest anybody has any business extending an auto loan. If you can't afford to pay it off in 3 years, you can't afford it and need to choose something cheaper.
Also, if needed, somebody could easily take dad to work in the morning and pick him in the afternoon. It's not like you guys have super hectic schedules. You obviously just like to piss money away. And that's your business and you're welcome to do so if you can afford to do it. I'll concede it does rather make my skin crawl to hear about it, knowing that your earning potential is what it is. But, at the end of the day, it's your life and it's not my business. But know that the Deluge is coming for you. It wouldn't hurt to make a few preparations.

[memphis]

I'm not seconding Gramps' motion yet, but if Inks continues with this damn fool notion that Bushie shouldn't begin a whirlwind romance with this Allison the door-to-door tupperware saleswoman character, then I just might.

Meh - if the worst he does is drive his parents into debt, I'm fine with that, because at this points, they're idiots for supporting his habits, so maybe they need to learn the lesson too.  What's going to be sad is if he fathers a child, because he does not have the capacity to care for a child, and his irresponsibility and past promiscuity are what really worry me.  Granted, I doubt he'll knock this Allison chick up, but if he does, that child is in for a rough life.

I believe he has had sex twice in his 31 year old life. Bushie has plenty of faults. Promiscuity is not one of them. Maybe if he saw the potential for a little more action, he'd have some motivation to get some exercise. After some thought, I've decided not to give Bushie a hard time about the car. It wasn't his purchase, and he can't tell his parents what to buy. I would encourage him to maintain the car he has as best as possible so that it will last as long as possible. Oil changes, tire rotation, timing belt, etc. Buying a car is such a financial nightmare for most people! My car and I are together til death do we part.

[memphis]

I wonder how much money Papa Bushie makes. They have a mortgage. Until recently, they had two because of Bushie's house. Then there was a third residence, a rental in Utah, which Bushie could not possibly afford on a meager call center wage. Obviously, houses require utilities, maintenance, insurance, and property tax. There are three cars. Even if one or two are paid for, gas, maintenance, insurance, and repairs add up quickly. They have very hefty food expenditures, as they eat out quite frequently. I'm sure they have substantial medical bills as his mother is a diabetic with renal failure. Dad is a diabetic also. All those supplies are expensive! They probably give a ton of money to their church. They have to give Bushie spending money, not just for more outside meals, but also for outlandish, ridiculous things like hotels in the snow and multiple pornographic subscriptions. They have to pay his multiple credit cards. They probably have cards of their own. They have to pay his absurd life insurance premiums. They've recently adopted a dog who is receiving veterinary care as well as behavioral training. The Census Bureau reports that median household income in Choctaw, OK is about $60k/year. They must be pulling in substantially more than that or sitting on a big pile of cash that is quickly evaporating. What does Papa Bushie do again?

[memphis]

I have a 2003 Acura TL, opebo. Similar to this, but darker grey:

[memphis]

Do you still have an engagement ring ready in a pinch?

[memphis]

There can only be one of two paths from here:

A. Bushie goes absolutely nowhere with the girl and this fizzles out.
B. Bushie gets engaged before the end of 2013.

There is no in between (i.e. entering a normal relationship). Take your pick, gents.

Update superfans know the odds favor both A and B occurring in the coming months.

[memphis]

Bushie, have you ever been screened for Attention Deficit Disorder? You show a lot of the stereotyped behaviors. Getting mine addressed has been immensely helpful!

[memphis]

Are there any non-chain restaurants in Oklahoma?

[memphis]

Get serious means progressing this relationship further.  Engagement is still likely a few months away.  Mom is not buying her ring!!! 

This made my day. Thank you.

[memphis]

asking for permission to do anything is weird, creepy, misogynistic and just wrong.

no 30+ year old man needs permission from parents to date or marry.  craziness.

I think the issue is more whether a ~30-year-old woman needs permission from her own parents.

Both sides of the coin are way screwy. If I were a dad, I'd be very disturbed by the guy asking as well. It suggests a major problem with independence and initiative.
When I was in high school, a girl once dared me to ask her dad if it was ok to marry her. So I did. It was a pretty funny moment.

[memphis]

A suggestiom: learn to cook something simple but tasty, and invite her to eat the meal you made. Any slob can take a girl out to a restaurant. Taking the time to cook makes a huge impression, even if the meal is not fancy. It shows effort and thought, something most people appreciate a lot. In an ideal world, where you were actually following through on your diet promise, it would also give you a lot more control over portion size and ingrediants.

[memphis]

I didn't say do it on the first date. She also shouldn't arrive until the meal is ready. Cooking together is also awesome, but way too advanced for Bushie, both in culinary and relationship senses. The kind of restaurants Bushie goes to are terrible for dates. They operate on razor thin profit margins, so are always understaffed, overcrowded at meal times, and are extremely noisy because they add about a hundred tvs at every angle to distract you from how miserable their environment actually is. Eating at a chain restaurant is a stessful situation, and nobody comes off at their best. I think he'd do better on an earlier "getting to know you" kind of date at church. They're gonna have to be compatible in that department. May as well find out sooner rather than later.

[memphis]

FACT: Neither Bushie nor his future wife will ever cook a single meal in a kitchen for themselves.

Fact: 25 years ago, that suggestion would have seemed glamorous and fantastical. Thanks, capitalism!

[memphis]

A 31 year old feels like now is his last chamce for love. WTF? People get married in their 40s, 50s, and beyond. Stop putting so much damn pressure on yourself. And don't put pressure on her either. If it works, great. If not, plenty of fish in the sea and plenty of time to go fishing.

[memphis]

It's been my experience that women don't like porn, but they put up with it as long as it doesn't interfere with daily life and is hidden from view along with any evidence or reminders. Trying to find a guy who isn't into porn is like trying to find somebody whose poop doesn't stink. It's a fact of life.

[memphis]

She said keep the mustache!

But seriously, 50% of interviewing well is visual presentation, so if you want this $40k/year job that the school has promised you, shave your mustache.

He doesn't live on the east coast full of serious people...

He also doesn't live on the west coast full of hipsters. Bushie's look isn't ironic.

[memphis]

BREAKING (from Bushie's facial book): He is colder than usual today.

Hopefully he fills us in on the details as soon as he gets home from school.

I hopped in my car as usual during lunch to sit and be still before my God and feeling His presence (along with the hot car warmed me up).

Can somebody translate this? I don't understand. He eats lunch in a car while sitting still and feeling up God?