I'm going to revise it:
Midwestern Birthday Cake, Legalization of Prostitution State Vote, and Lots of Smileys Proposition
1. Two months from the passage of this proposition, Each and Every State in the Midwestern Region shall hold a vote on the following items:
-"Should [insert state name here] have legal prostitution"? (Yes/No)"
-"Should Every Resident of [insert state name here] receive an additional birthday cake, in addition to their present regional birthday cake? (Yes/No)"
2. If a majority of voters in the state vote 'yes', then the following shall apply....
for the Birthday Cake State Proposition:
-Every citizen of the state shall, on their birthday, receive an 8" diameter, 4" high frosted cake of their favorite flavor, with 'Happy Birthday, [insert name of citizen here]' written on the cake in icing.
for the Prostitution State Proposition:
-The following shall become statewide statute:
"PROSTITUTION REGULATIONS
Section 1: Prostitution shall be legalized in the state of [insert state name here], save where specifically prohibited by municipal law.
Section 2: All prostitutes must be over the age of 21 and must sign a legal statement that their actions are voluntary.
Section 3: Prostitutes are forbidden to have customers under the age of 18. This shall be a misdemeanor offense if it does not otherwise violate local statuatory rape laws, punishable by a $1000 fine levied on the prostitute; repeat offenses shall have the prostitute banned from the practice.
Section 4: The State of [insert state name here], as well as municipal governments, shall have the right to regulate the prostitution industry, including for health and safety purposes. Such regulations may include, but are not limited to:
- Requiring use of a registered business location, as opposed to 'street work'
- Requiring mandatory drug and venereal disease tests.
- Mandating use of contraceptive devices during business activities;
- Implementing limits on prostitution stricter then those specified in Sections 1 to 3 of this act.
Section 5: Where no state or local regulations exist as per Section 4, the following regulations shall be followed:
- Female prostitutes engaging in sexual intercourse with a male customer will be required to either use pregnency-prevention contraceptives (including birth control, a condom, or a diaphragm) or sign a legal document beforehand waiving the right to seek child support from the customer.
- All prostitutes shall be required to utilize condoms during any sexual activity, unless both the customer and the prostitute sign a legal statement waiving any right to legal action if a venereal disease is transmitted through the act.
- Prostitutes shall be required to obtain testing for venereal diseases, including HIV, once a month. If a disease is detected, the prostitute is forbidden from seeing further customers, unless the customer beforehand signs a legal statement which details in 20 point font or greater that the customer understands the particular STD the prostitute has or has had in the past and waives legal responsibility in case the disease spreads to the customer.
Section 6: The goverment of the state of [insert state name here], as well as municipal governments, shall have the right to tax
the services given by the prostitution industry."
3. Smileys shall be the official online char-based method of emotional communication in the Midwest.