This is a struggle that I held through most of my adolescence after growing out of the all too Bush-era Dawkinsite milieu enforced by my parents. Growing into spirituality was a lengthy, experimental process, and is forever ongoing.
The satellite represents science serving as a quasi-faith and something to believe in, with Phoebe stating “I love science — I think science is like the closest thing to that that you’ll get [to the supernatural]”.
This false dichotomy being upheld by Ken Ham-Neil Tyson debate bro culture, though, plays an important role in enforcing the struggle to arrive at spirituality from no spiritual priors (as is its intention!), and disassembling the conception thereof in my philosophical priors was an essential part of my spiritual growth. Of course, the woo-woo ecofeminist path I have found myself on is perhaps uniquely oriented towards this, but in my experience it is not remotely unique to mine; my dear Argentine friend, for instance, is quite proud of incorporating Spinoza's interpretation of the nature of divinity within a Catholic framework. Finding the divine in one's immediate mundanity is just as vital as finding it in heightened experience and broad Jungian arcs of meaning.
Is it yet another small sign of the slow turn away from patriarchy rationalism that's eating away at Western society?
Without getting too post-ironically WE'MOON as I must restrain myself from doing at times, spirituality has indeed been for me a deeper way of communing with my femininity that cuts away at both my physicality and learned masculinity distorting it and the broader societal order of patriarchy-in-deferred-crisis and ecological post-post-apocalypse. There are times when I have more millenarian impulses about the violent death of one order giving birth in the ecstatic throes of travail to one more fit to divine order, or when I simply feel deep mourning transfigured into love; either impulse is more cathartic and productive than the detachment that you bemoan, that I had felt before. Through genuine connection to the earth and to those like you who dare to contemplate the vastness without prejudice and don't become shallower with proximity is how faith is expressed as love, and indeed to me faith is the ultimate form of love (agape, as it were).
Next do Bowie's "Quicksand"
