FT - House Committee on Un-Frémontian Activities

[WD]

Egads! New evidence has recently come to light, of a dastardly conspiracy to pervert the outcomes our elections, instigated by the prince of darkness, Witless Wulfric, himself! I am informed by a highly reliable source, that he has engaged to sell his vote for sex socks —a wicked scheme, the product of his depraved mind, which holds no thing sacred.

We must preach vigilance in our communities, and in particular to vulnerable young people: just say no to socks!

“Cascadiuh” or as he’s better known, OBD, should show himself immediately before the committee. He has much to answer for.

[OBD]

Egads! New evidence has recently come to light, of a dastardly conspiracy to pervert the outcomes our elections, instigated by the prince of darkness, Witless Wulfric, himself! I am informed by a highly reliable source, that he has engaged to sell his vote for sex socks —a wicked scheme, the product of his depraved mind, which holds no thing sacred.

We must preach vigilance in our communities, and in particular to vulnerable young people: just say no to socks!

“Cascadiuh” or as he’s better known, OBD, should show himself immediately before the committee. He has much to answer for.

I will not accede to the demands of the false committee, so long as they continue to blaspheme against Philism and infringe upon the national sovereignty of Cascadia.

[Unconditional Surrender Truman]

Egads! New evidence has recently come to light, of a dastardly conspiracy to pervert the outcomes our elections, instigated by the prince of darkness, Witless Wulfric, himself! I am informed by a highly reliable source, that he has engaged to sell his vote for sex socks —a wicked scheme, the product of his depraved mind, which holds no thing sacred.

We must preach vigilance in our communities, and in particular to vulnerable young people: just say no to socks!

“Cascadiuh” or as he’s better known, OBD, should show himself immediately before the committee. He has much to answer for.

I will not accede to the demands of the false committee, so long as they continue to blaspheme against Philism and infringe upon the national sovereignty of Cascadia.

Are you or are you not an agent of Wulfric?

[OBD]

Egads! New evidence has recently come to light, of a dastardly conspiracy to pervert the outcomes our elections, instigated by the prince of darkness, Witless Wulfric, himself! I am informed by a highly reliable source, that he has engaged to sell his vote for sex socks —a wicked scheme, the product of his depraved mind, which holds no thing sacred.

We must preach vigilance in our communities, and in particular to vulnerable young people: just say no to socks!

“Cascadiuh” or as he’s better known, OBD, should show himself immediately before the committee. He has much to answer for.

I will not accede to the demands of the false committee, so long as they continue to blaspheme against Philism and infringe upon the national sovereignty of Cascadia.

Are you or are you not an agent of Wulfric?

I am a Philist. And your actions in prosecuting us are aiding and abetting in Wulfric's shadow agenda.

[Unconditional Surrender Truman]

Disturbing evidence has recently come to light, that Mr. S019 — who represented himself to this body as an expert on occult Wulfricism — is in fact himself a Wulfricist. Considering the seriousness of these allegations, I call on him to clarify his association with Wulfric to the committee.

[𝕭𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖎𝖘𝖙𝖆 𝕸𝖎𝖓𝖔𝖑𝖆]

This battle for the soul of Frémont between Philists and Wulfricists continues to be a spectacle. The true struggle of our times.

[Unconditional Surrender Truman]

An anonymous citizen, an honest and vigilant PATRIOT, has advised this committee of various heinous and treasonable crimes falling within the purview of this committee.

You stand accused of murder. You stand accused of treason. How do you answer these charges ... HERR WULFRIC?

[Attorney General, LGC Speaker, and Former PPT Dwarven Dragon]

I am not going to provide any comment to this obviously hostile committee aside from denying any allegations of murder or treason.

[Unconditional Surrender Truman]

The accused having entered a plea of "not guilty," the state will now call its first witness.

Secretary PEEBS do you swear the testimony you are about to give is the truth, the whole truth, or nothing but the truth?

[President of the great nation of 🏳️‍⚧️]

Sorry, I only got to return to this earlier: Yes, I do, so help me Dave or Virginia or Fate or Time.

[Unconditional Surrender Truman]

Sorry, I only got to return to this earlier: Yes, I do, so help me Dave or Virginia or Fate or Time.

Tell us, what crimes has Goody Wulfric done, in your opinion, that are inimical to the principles of liberty and the union of this commonwealth? Is it true, as some have said, that "Wulfric did 9/11?"

[President of the great nation of 🏳️‍⚧️]

Yes, it is true that Wulfric did 9/11. On September 10, 2001, I saw Wulfric hob-nobbing with Billy Joel, Kermit the Frog, George W. Bush, and Al Gore, and I don't think they could have done it without him.