SB 30-05: Unidentified Primate Protection Act (Passed)

[Left Wing]

A BILL
To protect our unseen animals.

Be it enacted by the Senate and House of Representatives of the Republic of Atlasia in Congress assembled,

Section I. Title

i. This bill may be known as the Unidentified Primate Protection Act.

Section II. Definition

i. "Bigfoot" may be defined as any previously unknown-to-science bipedal hominid or ape-like creature inhabiting the wild of Atlasia.
ii. This creature may be known by multiple names, including Sasquatch, Skunk Ape, and a variety of others in Native cultures.

Section III. Protective Measures
i. The Congress of Atlasia hereby recognizes Bigfoot's existence.
ii. Bigfoot is hereby placed on the Endangered Species List.
iii. It shall be prohibited to kill or seriously injure a Bigfoot unless provoked.
iv. Killing a Bigfoot may be punished with a fine not exceeding $30,000 and/or up to one year in prison.
v. Any person who has seen a Bigfoot in a national park, forest, or other protected area may report the sighting to the park's administration. The park shall put a notice up alerting visitors of the creature's presence.

Section IV. The Deep State Gets Squatched
i. No government funds may be directed toward civilian or military operations intended to hunt or exterminate Bigfoot.
ii. No government funds may be directed toward civilian or military operations intended to hunt or exterminate any group of people commonly described as "feral" or "wildmen" living on the fringes of society.
iii. All government files regarding the 1969 disappearance of Dennis Martin, including those relating to the involvement of the Green Berets in the search and rescue operation, must be declassified.
iv. All government files relating to helicopter operations after the 1980 eruption of Mount St. Helens, specifically those relating to the removal and subsequent burning of Sasquatch corpses, must be declassified.
v. All government files relating to capture of Sasquatch after the 1999 Battle Mountain Fire in Nevada must be declassified.

Section V. Effect
i. This bill shall go into effect immediately after signature by the President.

Passed 6-1-1-1 in the Atlasian House assembled

Sponsor: Blair
Status: Passed

[Blair]

Happy to sponsor.

And will use my deputy hat to give 24 hours for objections

[Left Wing]

Blair is recognized as sponsor.

[SevenEleven]

This is a pressing issue and we must act swiftly! I support this bill as is.

[Blair]

This is a pressing issue and we must act swiftly! I support this bill as is.

I echo the words of my colleague and hope that the Senate will support this bill- specifically for the sections around transparency of previous events that have occurred in National Park property.

[Southern Senator North Carolina Yankee]

So final vote?

[SevenEleven]

Yeah there's nothing to add here, let's vote.

[Left Wing]

24 hours to object

[Left Wing]

Final vote now open.

[Left Wing]

Aye

[SevenEleven]

Aye.

[Blair]

aye

[Pericles]

Aye

[Southern Senator North Carolina Yankee]

Aye Guess

How many of you can say they voted on this while watching "Saxsquatch videos" on Youtube.

[Left Wing]

This passes the senate 5-0-0-1

Aye: FalterinArc, SevenEleven, Blair, Pericles, Yankee
Nay:
Abstain:
Didn’t Vote: Spark

[Left Wing]

A BILL
To protect our unseen animals.

Be it enacted by the Senate and House of Representatives of the Republic of Atlasia in Congress assembled,

Section I. Title

i. This bill may be known as the Unidentified Primate Protection Act.

Section II. Definition

i. "Bigfoot" may be defined as any previously unknown-to-science bipedal hominid or ape-like creature inhabiting the wild of Atlasia.
ii. This creature may be known by multiple names, including Sasquatch, Skunk Ape, and a variety of others in Native cultures.

Section III. Protective Measures
i. The Congress of Atlasia hereby recognizes Bigfoot's existence.
ii. Bigfoot is hereby placed on the Endangered Species List.
iii. It shall be prohibited to kill or seriously injure a Bigfoot unless provoked.
iv. Killing a Bigfoot may be punished with a fine not exceeding $30,000 and/or up to one year in prison.
v. Any person who has seen a Bigfoot in a national park, forest, or other protected area may report the sighting to the park's administration. The park shall put a notice up alerting visitors of the creature's presence.

Section IV. The Deep State Gets Squatched
i. No government funds may be directed toward civilian or military operations intended to hunt or exterminate Bigfoot.
ii. No government funds may be directed toward civilian or military operations intended to hunt or exterminate any group of people commonly described as "feral" or "wildmen" living on the fringes of society.
iii. All government files regarding the 1969 disappearance of Dennis Martin, including those relating to the involvement of the Green Berets in the search and rescue operation, must be declassified.
iv. All government files relating to helicopter operations after the 1980 eruption of Mount St. Helens, specifically those relating to the removal and subsequent burning of Sasquatch corpses, must be declassified.
v. All government files relating to capture of Sasquatch after the 1999 Battle Mountain Fire in Nevada must be declassified.

Section V. Effect
i. This bill shall go into effect immediately after signature by the President.

Passed 6-1-1-1 in the Atlasian House assembled



Passed 5-0-0-1 in the Atlasian Senate Assembled