The Trump Show

[Atlas Has Shrugged]

I can't seem to stick to anything beyond this sketch of an ATL Trump Presidency. Of all the timelines I'v worked on, Fading Hope and Radical Change was my favorite. This is a rebooted and considerably more altered version of the original timeline. It's less of an Obama-screw (that was never intentional, but still) and will take into account a number of other changes as well. Hope you enjoy!

Oh, and if there is any legal brouhaha from my use of images (exclusively from Wikipedia Commons or YouTube stills), this is not for profit and is for educational and entertainment purposes only, etc, etc.
This is the Academy Awards of politics, and I am the biggest star in the room! ~ Donald J. Trump.

Chapter I, Part I: Seth.

Sunday, May 1st, 2011.

9:00 PM

Seth Meyers hosting the 2011 White House Correspondents Dinner - "nerd prom."

1

It wasn’t the biggest night of Seth Meyer’s career, but it was a memorable one. To host the White House Press Correspondents Dinner was a rite of passage among comedians, and the large chunk of the nation not watching the baseball game were likely watching him. He knew which jokes would probably make the Morning Joe soundbites; the swipes at Fox News, the cracks about Donald Trump’s hair, the recent spectacle involving President Obama’s birth certificate, and so on. There were a few duds, such as the traditional tried and true dig at the sitting President for the continuing failure to capture Osama Bin Laden, but otherwise, it was a good set.

“He’s going to be a tough act to follow” whispered the President to the First Lady as Seth Meyers wrapped up his set. Returning to the dais, Seth took a seat next to Mrs. Obama after warmly shaking the President’s hand. Now it was Barack Obama’s turn; “I really hope I kill tonight” though President Obama, enjoying a joke that he could never dare share. The night was young – there would be little sleep to be had.

“My fellow Americans” begun the President, followed by an immediate dig at Donald Trump, who politely laughed as the world media’s cameras trained on his table. “I want to come clean and clear the air on the murky, suspicious circumstances surrounding my birth; not only have I released my long-form birth certificate, but I tonight will be airing my actual birth video!” A screen rolled down, and the birth sequence of the “Lion King” began to air. The room roared with laughter and applause, and Seth Meyers came to terms with the fact that the President would indeed be the story tomorrow morning. He had little idea how right he would be. “That was a joke” the President insisted, “I just wanted to make that clear to the Fox table.” Again, the room fell into uproarious laughter as Meyers watched on in admiration.

“Some people say I’m too professorial; I want to address that head on. That is why I’m assigning you all some reading – I know Donald Trump doesn’t like that – but you need to know the facts. Starting with my poll numbers.” Again, the room laughed. Trump looked pissed. Meyers was thrilled to see that big talking buffoon getting chewed up and spit out on national TV. And this was only just the beginning sensed Seth.

“I’ve even let down my core constituency – movie stars. Just the other day, Matt Damon said he was “disappointed in my performance.” I love Matt, I mean just love the guy. Well Matt, I just saw The Adjustment Bureau. So right back at you.”

“But the man of the hour is here tonight – that’s right, Donald Trump is here with us this evening. C’mon Donald, stand up take a bow!” Trump, ever the narcissist thought both the host and President, surely did take a stand and waved to the crowd. They responded with boos and hisses. Yet he was undeterred, and he stood standing with his arms crossed and a smirk creeping across his face, basking in all of the attention being paid to him at the moment. He turned to the President and give him the iconic double-thumbs up, with a false smile that nobody bothered to believe was sincere. Mainly because it wasn't.

“Nobody is prouder to put this birth certificate mess to rest than the Donald; that’s because he can finally get back to focusing on the issues that matter. Like did we fake the moon landing? Or what really happened at Roswell? Or just who exactly shot Biggy and Tupac!”

“All kidding aside Donald, we all know of your credentials and experience. No, seriously, just last week, on the Apprentice, you saw that a lack of leadership was the problem. So you didn’t fire Little John or Joan Rivers, you fired Gary Busey. That’s the kind of decision that keeps me up at night!”

President Obama's performance was highly praised.

2

The room was wrapped around Obama’s fingers; Seth gave up all remaining hope of being remembered at all. It would be, in the end, just another (well paying) gig. As the event drew to a close, the President and the First Lady were quickly whisked away through a kitchen backdoor to their awaiting motorcade, where the President was scurried off at high speeds to the White House. As the blue lights illuminated the streets of Washington, the President pensively watched the row houses go by as he pondered his future. There was no time to think of his performance.

Meanwhile, as Seth Meyers prepared to depart for the first of many after parties across Washington, the other star of the night was facing the cameras. Smiling before the throng of paparazzi and press, enveloped entirely in the flashes of hundreds of cameras with his supermodel spouse clinging to his arm, Trump boasted “this is the Academy Awards of politics, and I’m the biggest star in the room!” It made Meyer’s skin crawl. His I-Phone buzzing constantly from a sea of incoming text messages, Seth decided he needed a break – either at the bar or in his room, somewhere far away from this celebration of the elite's excesses, he thought.

Barack.

Sunday, May 1st, 2011.

11:10 PM

The Situation Room photo would become the most iconic of Obama's Presidency.

3

“Mr. President, we have a problem.” The words of CIA Director Leon Panetta, which echoed from the TV monitor on which he appeared via satellite from the Pentagon, struck the President like a lightning bolt. His blood ran cold, and he could feel his the pit of his stomach beginning to sink as he came to terms with the possibility that what was supposed to be his greatest triumph might have gone horribly wrong. After a brief moment of silence, the President worked up the courage to ask a question he feared being answered: “what happened?”

“Sir, Pakistani jets intercepted our helicopters shortly after crossing over the Afghan border. They attempted to turn around, but the Pakistani’s shot down one chopper and the others were forced to land. We are attempting to organize a rescue but we believe we will not be able to reach them before Pakistani ground forces arrive.”

“Are there casualties?” asked the President, the concern in his voice betrayed in the moment. “We have reason to believe that are casualties, Mr. President.” Panetta’s words haunted Obama – men were killed on his watch, and the mission at this point was practically already aborted. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton watched somberly, her phone lighting up with text messages from top aides at the State Department and from officials at the Pakistani embassy. Secretary of Defense Gate’s face was a ghostly shade of white.

“We’ll have to make a statement” said Vice President Biden in a low voice. The room remained silent. The President was solely focused on Panetta. “How long until the estimated arrival of Pakistani forces?” asked Obama. “Our satellites are already showing troop movements both in Abottabad and near the crash site.”

“So they knew we were coming?” asked Obama. “There is no way to know that at this time” sighed Panetta, “but they know we’re there now, and they’re coming.” “Shit” spat the President, who turned towards the remainder of those gathered in the Situation Room. “Hillary, I want you to get Zardari on the phone as soon as possible” Obama ordered, before turning to Director of National Intelligence James Clapper. “I want all of your eyes on that compound. I want every satellite, every asset, everything we possibly could have trained on that compound. I’m not letting that bastard get away. He isn’t dying in some cave somewhere. We are going to find him, and we are going to kill him."

The Donald.

Sunday, May 1st, 2011.

11:45 PM

Donald J. Trump lounged on the spotless cushioned seats of “Trump Force One” as it jettisoned through the skies over Maryland bound for his native New York, where he planned for a long night in front of the television watching reruns of the White House Correspondent’s Dinner. There would have to be a tweet at some point, but that could wait. Right now all Donald wanted to do was relax. Melania cradled their young son Baron in her lap as she joined her husband in watching the weekly episode of his profitable show “The Apprentice.” They watched attentively, until the screen turned crimson and the familiar chimes of death played. “This is an NBC Special Report” the announcer said.

NBC's Special Report intro.

4

“Shit. Who died?” asked Donald. Then the reality set in, and Trump watched in horror and anger as he learned of the failed mission. Brian Williams and a gaggle of NBC reporters spoke of the rumors that the target of the mission was Bin Laden. Geraldo Rivera likewise reported this on Fox, where his weekend show had been extended as Fox scrambled to martial their more serious reporters to get on the air. It was time for a tweet.

“I have to say something harsh” Trump fumed, “I have to have them talking about me tomorrow, because nobody else is going to stand up to that idiot!” Melania continued to hold Baron, running her fingers through his hair as he slept soundly, unaware of the events transpiring on the other side of the world. He was too young to understand.

“Donald, do not say anything disrespectful” Melania warned, “this is a time of war. In Slovenia, during the war, we never criticized our leaders. We stood behind them.” “Your leaders led your people to freedom from the communists” snapped back Trump, “they deserved respect. Obama? The guys a choke artist!” Ever happy to mansplain Eastern European history to his wife, who spoke four more languages than he could, Donald continued to rant and rave about Obama. About how he was ruining the economy (and his business). About how he was “fundamentally transforming” the America that Trump once knew. How he wasn’t tough enough on the Muslims.

Melania was happy to let him do it. She truly loved Donald for who he was, warts and all, and was deeply satisfied with the life that her God had blessed her with. A dutiful Roman Catholic, she actually feared very little, and was indeed a stronger woman than her detractors (almost always other women) would give her credit for. But there was one thing she feared, and she knew it was seconds away from coming out of Donald’s mouth.

“I’m going to run. I’m going to run and I’m going to win” said Trump, who turned to an aide huddled in the front of the plane. “Hey” he snapped at the sleeping intern, who was too exhausted to hear his boss’s command. “Hey!” he again barked, this time louder, before getting up with a grumble and walking over to shake the poor kid awake. “I need you to tweet something for me” he ordered, “I want you type in exactly what I say and how I say it.” “Yes, Mr. Trump” replied the kid with a yawn. It would be a long flight back to New York.

When the intern explained the joke in the hashtag, Trump laughed uproariously and slapped the kid on the shoulder. “Good work. Get some sleep.” Trump returned to the back labyrinth of Trump Force One, and dialed a number from a phone attached to a desk. “Steve, I’m gonna need your help” he said into the phone.

Mea Culpa.

Monday, May 2nd, 2011.

2:15 AM

Obama announces the failure of Operation Neptune Spear.

5

“My fellow Americans" begun the President, his eyes betrayed the deep sadness and disappointment he felt. “It gives me no pleasure to stand here tonight and announce to the American people the failure of a highly critical military operation in Pakistan” he continued. “During the mission, Pakistani authorities became aware of our activities in their country and responded to our presence, as is their right as a sovereign power” continued the President, “and I want to personally apologize to the people of Pakistan for what they, justly, may perceive as a slight to their country.” The President cleared his throat; the apology was demanded by President Zardari as a condition for the release of the captured Navy Seals. It would no doubt become a Republican soundbite by sunrise.

“I want to address the status of our Navy Seals” Obama continued, “at this time, we have confirmed that a total of five Navy Seals were killed in the crash of one of the helicopters, and that the remaining Seals have been taken into custody. We have spoken with Pakistani authorities and can verify that they are being held in good condition that those who need it are receiving adequate medical care” Obama confirmed, knowing damn well that those details were meaningless and would not hold back the onslaught of anger.

“These young men risk – and tragically, in some cases tonight, gave their lives, to fight the scourge of terrorism across the glove…..” As Obama’s speech continued, the chromocast on all of the cable news stations continued to relay the latest information. The White House was leaking like a sponge, and the rumors were running strong that Osama Bin Laden himself was the target of the mission. The Seals knew not to reveal anything, even under torture, and Obama took comfort in their strength. Though the operation might have failed, it could be undertaken again perhaps in the future with limited Pakistani cooperation.

Of course, the question remained open as to whether or not the Pakistani’s knew Bin Laden was existing in their midst. The location of his compound in Abottabad, just miles from the nation’s top military academy, suggested that elements of the ISI were aware or even abetting the fugitive terrorist leaders efforts to remain under the radar. If even one of the Seals revealed the US was aware of his location, he would be assuredly tipped off and lost once again. This couldn’t happen. Obama would have to do whatever it takes to placate the Pakistani government. They had him over a barrel.

Hillary.

Monday, May 2nd, 2011.

10:30 AM

Embattled Secretary of State Hillary Clinton.

6

The press was eagerly awaiting the Secretary of State to enter the Department’s press room, where she was expected to make a brief statement on the Pakistan crisis and maybe even take a few questions. All the major cable news and broadcast networks interrupted their program an hour in advance of Hillary’s statement, with a whole host of commentators, analysts, retired politicians, ex-military officers, all kinds of journalists, and other generic irrelevant on in segment after segment to offer their commentary.

Not even twelve hours had passed and Republicans were already frothing at the mouth, sensing copious amounts of blood in the water. Newt Gingrich, Ron Paul, Rick Santorum, and Herman Cain had all made headlines that morning with their individual comments. Gingrich called President Obama’s incursion into Pakistan “a flawed mission” ordered by a “flawed president.” Ron Paul turned heads when he said he would not have ordered the mission to begin with, describing the violation of Pakistan’s sovereignty as “inexcusable” and defending the Pakistani government’s “natural” response to the events. Santorum called the disaster “ inevitable” due to “the Obama-Paul doctrine of blame America first!” But none of them mattered: Hillary knew, at this moment, that the eyes of the world were now trained on her.

Stepping to a mic before the sound of a flurry of camera clicks and flashes, Clinton began her statement. “I am pleased to announce this morning that the Pakistani government has agreed to release all American personnel currently in their country, and will repatriate the bodies of those servicemen tragically lost as well. This episode in our history is a sobering reminder that freedom and security both come at a high cost, but I take heart knowing that every American treasures these five lost heroes as much as I do.”

“Unfortunately, there are times when the United States has to do what is expedient in order to achieve what is right. We acted unilaterally in Pakistan to remove a hostile actor from the geopolitical scene in a mission of the utmost importance; unfortunately, due to the complications, we were not able to reach this threat.”

“However, this incident, while yes, damaging to American and Pakistani relations, will not wreck our solidarity in the war on terror and radical ideologies. We stand shoulder to shoulder with our friends in Pakistan. Friends, of course, sometimes have their spats. The unique partnership we share with the people of Pakistan is no different. But we cannot let these matters get in the way of what unites us, which is a world free from the threat of terrorism. That is why the United States will take the initiative once again to restore Pakistan’s faith in our government; today, I am announcing that I will join my Pakistani partner in Islamabad later this year to work out a framework to dramatically overhaul how the United States and Pakistan shares classified information and collaborates against radical jihadist networks.”

“The Pakistani government has been receptive to this proposal, and I look forward to working with the President to continue to stabilize this tumultuous region of the world, so that every Afghan and Pakistani child can grow up to their God given potential. Thank you, and good morning, and God Bless America.”

With that, Hillary Clinton excited the room. “Secretary Clinton! Secretary Clinton!” they yelled in a disjointed cataclysm of sound, “when will the Seals be released exactly?” “Do you know if they were shot down or crashed during a landing attempt?” “How severe are the injuries and how many were treated for their wounds?” “Will Pakistan confirm or deny that they were aware of the incursion before the attack?” “Was the target really Bin Laden?” It was no use. Clinton was already in the elevator heading back up to her office, and they were still shouting questions down the hall at her remaining retinue.

“Do they know the real numbers?” Hillary asked Huma Abedin in the elevator. “No, not yet” replied Abedin, “but they’ll leak soon if we don’t stay on top of it. We need to find a way to redirect the hit to. Obama’s done, but you can still go on.”
[1] Still taken from YouTube video (source: CSPAN).
[2] Still taken from YouTube video (source: CSPAN).
[3] Taken from Wikipedia Commons.
[4] Still taken from YouTube video (source: gman1290)
[5] Taken from Wikipedia Commons.
[6] Taken from Wikipedia Commons.

[Atlas Has Shrugged]

I'm going to largely reupload my original version with tweaks for grammatical errors and various minor contradictions. I'll have this done by the end of the week hopefully, though within a few months time I plan to take a totally different route, so the last handful of updates of the original version are no longer in play. I don't want to spoil anything major, but yeah, Hillary might have to wait a while longer this time around

Episode I, Act II: Bolton.

Monday, May 2nd, 2011.

11:45 AM

Former UN Ambassador John Bolton at CPAC 2011.

1

John Bolton had just wrapped up an appearance at some kind of conservative conference or another - you know, the kind they'd air on C-SPAN 2 live in it's entirety. The phone rang, and it was Governor Romney; the mustachioed former UN Ambassador had no time for pleasantries. Ignoring the call, he instead made busy making plans of his own. As he drove to his Maryland home from the hotel in Washington, he quickly found himself speaking via Bluetooth with a number of nattering nab-nobs of neoconservativism. Vice President Cheney, Bill Kristol, and But it was the call with Cabell Hobbs, a Virginia based political consultant who had worked in the Bush administration that was the most important.


“I want to run, Cabell, the party needs my voice more than ever. We can’t keep following Obama-ism like Ron Paul wants us to do.” “I agree, I agree” insisted Hobbs, “so when do you plan on pulling the trigger?" “I went and picked up the FEC paperwork myself” answered the former UN Ambassador, “I haven’t filled them out yet. I got David French signed on board as chairman this morning. All I need is someone to make sure the trains are on time. I think that’s you.”

“John, I’m humbled” began Hobbs, “but I have a job I’m happy with and I’m…”

“You’re not sure I can win? I understand Cabell, I know I can’t win. I’m not running to win. I’m running to prove a point.”

“How do you plan on doing that?”

“By doing well enough to make the others talk what I’m talking about. I think I’d be out by October if I get in.”

“So you want me to steer the ship until it gets to port?”

 “Exactly, that’s exactly what I need.” John ran his fingers through his whispy white mustache, thinking of his next trip to New Hampshire and the possibilities of a presidential run.

Doctor Paul.

Wednesday, May 4th, 2011.

1:40 PM

Congressman Ron Paul campaigns in Iowa.

2

A roar went up when Ron Paul entered the Student Union at a small community college in the Iowa town of Ottumwa, with chants of “President Paul! President Paul! President Paul!” The elderly man, though hardly frail, couldn’t help but be astonished at the amount of young people who would come out to see him. “It’s the message, not me” he repeated to himself in his head, practically like a mantra. It had kept him grounded when the rest of Washington started to lose their sense of purpose. And now it sustained him as he took his fight against Washington one more time. “What can I say? Freedom is popular!” Paul declared as he took to the stage. The reception he had received across Iowa was enough for him to make up his mind – he was running for President. He had formed an exploratory committee in April, and had raised record amounts of campaign cash in the form of small donations from his base of supporters. Paul briefly put his thoughts towards the future, but realizing that he still had a speech to give, put the ideas for his announcement out of his head.

“Our future is not in Iraq or Afghanistan” Paul lectured as the college aged audience begun whooping and hollering, “our future is in America, where the constitution still stands! We must be weary of our foreign entanglements, for we risk going the way of Rome!” A sign in the back held by a student read “Doctor Paul cured my apathy,” and Paul pointed out to the student as he spoke and acknowledged him with a nod as he spoke.

Doctor Paul – the Good Doctor, according to his most adoring fans, argued passionately for the withdrawal of American forces from Iraq, the evils of the Federal Reserve System and the virginal purity of sound money, and the growing threat of the federal surveillance state. The young students, all the foot soldiers of the Ron Paul revolution, were in a trance like awe in the presence of the only man they believed could cure Washington of its ills. He was a doctor after all.

“Nowhere is the battle for liberty more important than in the courts. The Supreme Court now is going to take up this healthcare mandate. We have a Supreme Court determining key constitutional questions through the lens of how big they can grow government. We truly need at this time more than ever true constitutionalists on the court. I know, I know, the statists, you know, they like to point to the interstate commerce clause, and for the last one hundred years or so they’ve been doing what they want with that. So we can’t just stop the expansion of government – we need to shrink it too. And the best way to do that is by appointing constitutionalist judges.”

“In the past ten years, the debt has exploded by four trillion because of the wars going on. This isn’t just a moral issue, its an economic issue. There’s a great debate in foreign policy, but the conversation is “what country do we invade next?” They try and write us off as being isolationists. But I don’t know many isolationists who want to open up trade and travel with Cuba.”

The speech continued, the crowd never losing their enthusiasm or interest, despite being ignored by every news outlet. The event was only broadcast on C-SPAN, which was fairly routine for the candidate, but he could sense there was something happening. The media wasn’t fooling anybody. The youth were really tuned into his message. They were tired of politics as usual, and there was a revolution brewing amongst them. Little did Doctor Paul know that another candidate was waiting in the wings, ready to steal his thunder.

Doctor Paul.

Thursday, May 5th, 2011.

7:00 PM

Businessman Herman Cain was among the notable early candidates.

2

BRET BAIER: Good evening, and welcome to the first Republican debate, sponsored by Fox News and the Republican Party of South Carolina. I’d like to now introduce the candidates. Tonight, we have businessman Herman Cain, former Governor Gary Johnson, former Governor Tim Pawlenty, Congressman Ron Paul, former Governor Mitt Romney, and former Senator Rick Santorum. Here’s the format for our debate tonight, each candidate will be asked a series of questions on foreign and domestic issues. Answers are limited to one minute each, if we decide rebuttal time is needed, that will be 30 seconds. We have green, yellow and red lights to help the candidates keep track of their time and if an answer runs long, candidates and everyone else will hear this sound…there it is.

(Audience applause)

We ask our large and enthusiastic audience to please limit applause during the question and answer portion of the debate, so we can devote as much time as possible to the candidates. Now let’s get started, Governor Pawlenty. President Obama has faced near universal criticism for the failed mission in Abottabad. Would you have ordered the raid as President?

TIM PAWLENTY: Well, Bret, thanks first of all to you, Fox News, and the South Carolina Republican Party for hosting us tonight. I’m very pleased to be here. I’m not very pleased about the grim reality that we face tonight. The Commander-in-Chief is too unfit for command, as we have seen in Abottabad. The raid was a complete disaster, and President Obama’s micromanaging nature is entirely to blame. Our brave eighteen SEALS were released yesterday by Pakistan, who knowingly shot down our helicopters in a –

BRET BAIER: That’s a bold claim.

TIM PAWLENTY: - it was a bold act by a nation that pretends to be our ally; do we really believe the Pakistanis? Do we really believe the ISI, which funds and supports the Haqqani network? That Bin Laden was living in the shadow of their military’s top academy all that time unknown? And yet, Obama apologizes to this nation. We ought to be severing diplomatic ties and labeling them a state sponsor of terror! This is a travesty!

BRET BAIER: Senator Santorum you said Monday President Obama has made the country less safe and his policies have made America’s enemies “less fearful and less respectful” of us. But when it comes to going after terrorists for example, drone attacks in Pakistan have more than tripled under president Obama, he sent 30,000 more US troops into Afghanistan last year and he just authorized” as we talked about this….albeit failed….this attempted mission to kill Bin Laden, how much more aggressive could he be?

RICK SANTORUM: If you look at what president Obama has done right in foreign policy, it is always been a continuation of the Bush policies. He’s gone right by keeping Gitmo open, he’s done right by finishing the job in Iraq, and he has done right by trying to enter into Afghanistan. Those were existing policies that were in place, the decision he made with Osama Bin Laden was a tactical decision, not a strategic decision. Which is why we lost those 32 men. Obama has their blood on his hands tonight.

On the same hand, the strategic decision was made already by President Bush to go after him, what president Obama has done on his watch, the issues that have come up while he’s been president, he’s got it wrong strategically every single time, whether it’s in Central America, Colombia and Honduras, whether it’s in the Middle East, with Egypt, with Syria and most importantly with Iran.

BRET BAIER: Governor Romney, would you have ordered the mission in Pakistan?

MITT ROMNEY: I take President Obama at his word. This was a tough call –

(Audience boos)

MITT ROMNEY: - a tough call that had to be made. The intervention of the Pakistanis failed the mission, not the President. I have plenty of criticisms of the President, but trying to kill the mastermind of 9/11 will never be among them.

BRET BAIER: But that begs the question Governor Romney, how would the Pakistanis-

MITT ROMNEY: The Pakistanis have been given a choice: pick a side. They can’t seem to make up their minds. Well my mind is made up, and so was President Bush’s: Pakistan is either for us or against us. It is high time a final ultimatum is made to Pakistan, so we can deal with their government accordingly. Should they refuse any further cooperation, then we’ll have no choice but to label their government a state sponsor of terrorism.

BRET BAIER: Congressman Paul, you have wanted to pull US troops out of Afghanistan for years, in fact you said on the House floor about the US military’s efforts in Afghanistan: “whose interest do we serve by continuing this exercise in futility?” So if President Paul had been running things and troops were already out of Afghanistan, wouldn’t that mean that Osama Bin Laden would be alive today anyway?

RON PAUL: Absolutely not, I mean he wasn’t caught in Afghanistan, nation building in Afghanistan and telling those people how to live and getting involved in running their country hardly had anything to do with finding the information, where he was being held in a country that we give billions of dollars of foreign aid to, at the same time we’re bombing that country. So it’s the policy that’s at fault, no not having the troops in Afghanistan wouldn’t have hurt. But we went to Afghanistan to get him and he hasn’t been there, so I hope we can now reassess it and get the troops out of Afghanistan and end that war that hasn’t helped us and hasn’t helped anybody in the Middle East.

BRET BAIER: Mr. Cain about Afghanistan, you recently said this: “if the experts, the generals, the joint chiefs of staff, if they believe we can win, I’m not going to tear up the plan they give me. I’m going to execute the plan, if we can’t win, I want to know what we can do to exit with dignity out of that country.” You’re running for president after almost ten years in Afghanistan, you don’t have your own plan yet about what you would do in Afghanistan?

HERMAN CAIN: No because it’s not clear what the mission is, that’s the bigger problem. It’s not clear what the mission is, it’s not real clear to the American people what our interests are and the thirdly it’s not clear what the road map to victory is and what does that mean? This is why I would revisit the issue in defining those three critical questions, asking those questions before I as president made a decision. Because before I make a decision to send men and women in uniform into battle, I want to make sure we know what the objective is clearly, that we clearly know how it serves our interest either at home or abroad and thirdly, what is our road map to victory?

BRET BAIER: But sir, how would you define winning in Afghanistan right now as you’re looking at it as a candidate?

HERMAN CAIN: My point is, the experts and their advice and their input would be the basis for me making that decision. I’m not privileged to a lot of confidential information since I’m not in government and I’m not in the administration, one of the things that I’ve always prided myself on is making an informed decision based upon knowing all of the facts and at this point, I don’t know all the facts but that’s the process that I would use. Make sure that we’re working on the right problem, make sure that we set the right priorities relative to Afghanistan and every other country, thirdly make sure we get the advice from the right people and then put those plans into place.

BRET BAIER: Governor Johnson, you have said, you are an advocate of getting out of Afghanistan tomorrow. You’ve also said that you’d support a democratic plan to establish a timetable with an end date for withdrawal of US troops in Afghanistan. Are you worried at all about providing a specific end date and that possibly would enable the Taliban to move in the day after the US troops left?

GARY JOHNSON: Well, first of all, I’m not in favor of a timetable, I’m in belief that that timetable should be tomorrow and I realize that tomorrow may involve several months. I was opposed to us going into Iraq from the beginning, I really thought that there was no threat to our national security, I really thought that if we went into Iraq we would find ourselves in a civil war to which there would be no end and I thought we had the military surveillance capability to see Iraq rollout any weapons of mass destruction and if they would have done that, we could have gone in and dealt with that. Afghanistan originally, I was completely supportive of that, we were attacked, we attacked back, that’s what our military is for and after six months, I think we pretty effectively taken care of Al Qaeda.

But that was 10 years ago, we’re building roads, schools, bridges and highways in Iraq and Afghanistan and we’re borrowing 43 cents out of every dollar to do that. In my opinion, this is crazy and then looking at Libya right now, I’m a position right now where I’m issuing opinions on everything right away, my opinion on Libya is I’m opposed to A through Z.

Monday, May 9th, 2011: New polling shows Obama popularity plummeting.

Barack Obama: Approval Rating (Gallup).
Disapprove: 57%
Approve: 32%
Neutral: 11%

Joe Biden: Approval Rating (Gallup).
Approve: 44%
Disapprove: 43%
Neutral: 13%

Hillary Clinton: Approval Rating (Gallup).
Disapprove: 47%
Approve: 29%
Neutral: 24%

2012 Republican Presidential Nomination (CNN)
Mitt Romney: 19%
Mike Huckabee: 15%
Donald Trump: 14%
Sarah Palin: 11%
Newt Gingrich: 9%
Rudy Giuliani: 7%
Ron Paul: 6%
Tim Pawlenty: 5%
Herman Cain: 4%
Mitch Daniels: 4%
Jon Huntsman: 3%
Gary Johnson: 1%
Rick Santorum: 1%
John Bolton: 1%

Presidential Matchups (Suffolk University)
Mitt Romney: 44%
Barack Obama: 33%
Undecided/Other: 23%

Barack Obama: 42%
Mike Huckabee: 42%
Undecided/Other: 16%

Barack Obama: 49%
Donald Trump: 26%
Undecided/Other: 25%

Barack Obama: 46%
Sarah Palin: 34%
Undecided/Other: 20%

Barack Obama: 45%
Newt Gingrich: 32%
Undecided/Other: 23%

Rudy Giuliani: 50%
Barack Obama: 39%
Undecided/Other: 11%

Barack Obama: 42%
Ron Paul: 37%
Undecided/Other: 21%

Tim Pawlenty: 47%
Barack Obama: 37%
Undecided/Other: 16%

Barack Obama: 46%
Herman Cain: 35%
Undecided/Other: 19%

Mitch Daniels: 42%
Barack Obama: 38%
Undecided/Other: 20%

Jon Huntsman: 37%
Barack Obama: 32%
Undecided/Other: 31%

Barack Obama: 49%
Rick Santorum: 27%
Undecided/Other: 24%

Barack Obama: 39%
Undecided/Other: 34%
John Bolton: 27%
[1] Taken from Wikipedia Commons (Gage Skidmore).
[2] Taken from Wikipedia Commons (Gage Skidmore).
[3] Still taken from YouTube video (ramsalvo49).

[Atlas Has Shrugged]

Episode I, Act III: Boehner.

Tuesday, May 10th, 2011.

3:25 PM

President Obama, Vice President Biden, and Speaker Boehner in happier times.

[1]

Being Speaker of the House was not easy, especially when the Republican caucus was as fractured as it was. But John Boehner was not ready to throw in the towel. Just six months ago, he led the House GOP to victory, taking back the majority after four years of Democratic control. Now, old divisions and new members threatened to take the reclaimed Republican majority back into the throes of chaos. Now, he was facing the first true test of his leadership. This was his first opportunity to claim the mantle of leader of the opposition to the embattled Obama presidency. The debt ceiling debate would be the perfect opportunity to bring the spendthrift administration to heel at long last.

Negotiations with Vice President Biden were rocky; while both parties agreed that a debt ceiling increase was unavoidable, Boehner was under pressure from the Tea Party wing of the Republican caucus to push for austere spending cuts. This had made a deal virtually impossible for the duration of the buildup to the crisis, and now with time running out,

“John, how are you?” asked Biden, trying his best to be affable. “I’m doing well Mr. Vice President” Boehner replied, ushering the nation’s second most powerful man into his office. “The caucus hasn’t eaten you alive yet?” asked Biden with the airs of arrogance which he tried to unconvincingly hide with a chuckle, but Boehner brushed aside the slight. “On the contrary, Joe, we’re more united than ever. We have given you our demands. The ball is in your court. Tell the President that we won’t be budging on this one.”

“No, you don’t understand” implored the Vice President, “we don’t have the times to play games man! We’re going over the fiscal cliff and you guys are going to take us back into the FINKsing depression for what? For politics? Where has your soul gone? Where is your sense of patriotism?” Boehner stewed behind his desk, his face turning from a shade of orange to red. “I resent that” he finally said, “it’s clear to me that we’re just going to have to agree to disagree Joe. You didn’t come for a meeting. You came to regurgitate your demands. I’m not wasting my time any further.”

Biden turned and left, snapping his fingers at his Secret Service retinue to assume position as he stormed through the door. Walking through the halls of the Capitol, the awaiting press were taken aback as the Vice President’s entourage exited the speaker’s office mere minutes after they had first arrived. Andrea Mitchell of NBC, herself no spring chicken, briskly threw herself and her tape recorder into Biden’s face as a camera hovered over them. “Mr. Vice President, has a deal been reached?” she asked, “just ask John” replied Biden with a searing smile, “I want to hear his explanation for this myself!”

Barreling towards his motorcade surrounded by a plethora of Secret Service Agents, the Vice President pulled out his cellphone to make a call he knew was coming. “Mr. President, there was no deal. There was no meeting. They won't budge. Tell Tim to start shuttering the Treasury, we’re heading towards the cliff.” “FINKs. FINKs!” Obama raged. At that moment, Valerie Jarrett burst into the office, having witnessed Mitchell and Biden’s exchange on MSNBC as it happened live. But hearing the President’s anger, she knew she was too late. The bad news had already reached him.
Note to readers: Using INKs to censor profanity is an old Atlas joke that is underused these days.

Wednesday, May 11th, 2011: Newt Gingrich launches 2012 campaign.

[2]

ATLANTA, GA: Promising to “return America to hope and opportunity,” Newt Gingrich confirmed his intentions to seek the presidential nomination of the Republican Party in a video message released on his website and social media. The former House Speaker’s campaign has been plagued by several early gaffes, ranging from an awkward and nearly aborted announcement of the formation of an exploratory committee to criticisms of Paul Ryan’s agenda for Medicare and Medicaid reform. Expensive purchases at Tiffany’s in New York and a luxurious two week Mediterranean cruise further damaged his campaign, with many in the media unsure if he was actually running or not in the wake of the botched roll out.

The delayed official entry of Gingrich into the Republican field makes him the third candidate to have officially taken the plunge, despite a number of candidates formally exploring bids. Gingrich joins former New Mexico Governor Gary Johnson and former UN Ambassador John Bolton in an increasingly widening field. Ready to take on President Obama, whose approval ratings suddenly have dropped off dramatically in the wake of the field Pakistan operation believed to have been targeting Bin Laden, Gingrich believes he can overcome past controversies to steamroll his way to the nomination.

To follow his announcement, Gingrich will make a speech to Georgia’s Republican grassroots at an event in Atlanta, before traveling to Iowa where he intends to spend a week blitzing the state in order to begin building his campaign operation ahead of the caucuses next year. Media reports are speculating that Congressman Ron Paul will announce his candidacy in New Hampshire on Friday, while Governor Huckabee has indicated he’ll make clear his intentions on the end of his regularly scheduled Fox broadcast on Saturday night. Businessman Donald Trump has scheduled two previously unannounced visits to New Hampshire tomorrow as well, making it evident that he has come closer to a final decision.

Gates.

Wednesday, May 11th, 2011.

2:00 PM

Secretary Gates offers his resignation to President Obama.

[2]

The Secretary of Defense straightened his tie as he prepared to face the inevitable; the President had summoned him to the Oval Office, and he had already brought along a resignation letter that he had written before the Pakistan mission’s failure. He never hoped to see the letter again once he put it in the envelope. Now he had to hand it to the President, watch him read it, and then at last watch him act on the resignation. It was a bitter end to a happy career. As he waited patiently to be shepherded into the Oval Office, Valerie Jarrett approached. “Mr. Secretary” she said in practically a low whisper, “the President will see you know.”

President Obama sat behind the desk of the Oval Office, his hands folded and his elbows resting on the edge. He looked pensive, somber, and exhausted. “Secretary Gates” he begun, “this is very hard for me. I’m sorry.” "Sorry my ass" gates thought to himself, embittered that after decades on the battlefront that he was being forced to fall on that community organizer's sword. The President reached forward and Secretary Gates handed him the resignation letter. He slowly opened it and briefly read it, before returning his gaze to the Secretary. “I’m sorry to see you go” sighed the President, “you understand.” Gates nodded. “Do you have any idea as to whom I will be replaced with?” Gates asked. “We’re thinking of Tom Donilon. Panetta was our first choice but he’s now damaged goods. Wesley Clark has been pushed by Secretary Clinton. We’re probably going with Tom Donilon though.” “I see” Gates nodded, “you’re leaving the Pentagon in good hands.” “I'm sure of that, Robert, I'm sure of that. I’m sure you have some things to take care of....” said Obama, picking the phone up into his hand. The Secretary – whose resignation was scheduled to take effect within twenty two hours, took his leave from the Oval Office and quietly left the White House for the last time through a back exit, where he was whisked away to the Pentagon.

On the ride back, Gates weighed his career in the eyes of history. Though it had been brought to a tragic and abrupt end after the aborted Abottabad raid, there were still plenty of successes to be celebrated. He had overseen the reconstruction of the Iraqi army and the beginning of the withdrawal of US forces from Iraq. In war torn Afghanistan, he had brought the Taliban insurgency to a standstill and had largely eliminated the last remnants of Al Qaida active in the country. The war on terror, despite the Abbottabad failure, was rolling towards a low scale plateau, a seeming lull in the Islamist insurgencies. One day, Gates knew, they would be crush once and for all.

He had only one regret. He wouldn’t be there for it.

Ron.

Friday, May 13th, 2011:

5:00 PM.

[4]

"Thank you! Thank you! It's great to be back here in Exeter and in the great liberty loving Granite State. I come with one important update about our revolution; the revolution is spreading, steadily growing, and building momentum. Our time has come - this moment can be ours if we so choose to seize it. A lot of other work has been done. It's been the intellectual work. I am convinced that a nation does not change just for partisan political reasons. What has to happen is there has to be an intellectual revolution to energize people and get people to understand the problems from morally grounded terms as well as political policy.

That is what has been happening now for quite a few decades. There's quite a bit of difference about attitudes about economics and foreign policy today than there was in 1976 when I was first elected. There's a big difference, and it involves a lot of work from a lot of people. And now that so many people in this country have come to understand that government. They can now see through its pretense that it can take care of us from cradle to grave and police the world; it is now evident to this growing number of people that government isn't the solution, but that government really has created the problem.

And what our opponents so often we like to do is say oh, you people don't even want any government. But you know in our society with our Constitution there is a role for government. But the Constitution wasn't written explicitly to restrain your behavior and your life and the way you spend your money. It was written to restrain the federal government.

But because of the educational effort and the work that so many have done, and also the strong evidence that there is a failure out there, especially since we saw what happened with predictable events such as the housing bubble burst. It did as the Austrian free market economists had predicted. And because of all this they have come together and people are now listening to this revolutionary spirit that is spreading across this country!

It's great that I am able to announce in this state, a very special state, because there is so high respect for the spirit of liberty here, so I am very, very pleased that I am once again able to say that I am a candidate for the presidency in the Republican Party primary!"

Mike.

Saturday, May 14th, 2011:

Washington, DC.

Huckabee announces the end of his weekend variety show on Fox as he mounts a second presidential campaign.

[5]

“If I were to pursue a bid for the Presidency, I’d start from a prime positon to win. That is what all of the polls show. All signs say there is no reason to say no, and my heart is saying: “go!” And so that’s the decision I made tonight; this will be my final broadcast, and I’ll be filing with the FEC as a candidate next week. Thank you for standing by me for these many years; I promise that whatever path God takes me, I’ll stand by you just the same. Good night, God bless, and thank you.”

NEW YORK, NY: On the set of his live (and final) broadcast of his Fox show “Huckabee,” former Arkansas Governor and 2008 presidential candidate Mike Huckabee announced his candidacy for the Presidency of the United States. Just an hour after his statement concluding his show, Huckabee was again on the air live with Geraldo Rivera, where he detailed his decision on a second presidential bid, and his plans to challenge the Obama administration and Governor Romney on values issues and healthcare policy.

Huckabee is virtually tied with possible candidate Donald Trump for second place in the polls behind Governor Romney, who is the frontrunner and expected to formally announce his candidacy in a few weeks. With solid support in the south and among evangelicals, Huckabee will likely have to compete with prospective candidates like Herman Cain and Sarah Palin for the support of the increasingly strong Tea Party faction of the party.

Iowa is in Huckabee’s sights, where he intends to replicate his 2008 win over Governor Romney once again. Hoping the first caucus could propel him to the nomination, Huckabee stresses that his outsider status, executive experience, and more populist oriented economic policies will make him the strongest candidate to take on a vulnerable incumbent in next year’s general election.

Sunday, May 15th, 2011: Geithner to order emergency debt-ceiling measures.

[6]

NEW YORK, NY: Treasury Secretary Tim Geithner met with several leading figures in the financial sector in New York to discuss the plans of the Treasury Department to sell off assets belonging to the Civil Service Retirement and Disability Fund in order to vanquish concerns over whether or not the United States could possibly hit the so called “debt-ceiling” that restricts borrowing. The plan is a short term measure needed in order for the Federal Government to raise enough revenue until a debt-ceiling raise can be reached.

The stopgap measure puts further pressure on both the Congress and administration to reach an agreement before the United States risks a credit downgrade. Talks between the Vice President and Republican Congressional figures have broken down, with Senator Tom Coburn (R-OK) leaving the so called “Gang of Six” in protest of the Republican demands for spending cuts not being sufficiently met. The Republican controlled House has threatened to vote down any budget that doesn’t impose enough cuts to offset the raise in the debt ceiling, while Democratic Senators are pushing for tax increases to be considered as well.

Though the crisis has three months left before a final solution is reached, the President has expressed frustration with the Republican controlled House for what he has deemed “obstruction.” Congressional leaders in both parties, on the other hand, have also vented their own disgruntlement with the President, with Senator Bernie Sanders (I-VT) lambasting President Obama “for putting principle and the working people on the back-burner” to the applause of some other progressive minded members of Congress, who feel the administration is bending too easily to the Republican House majority’s demands.
[1] Taken from Wikipedia Commons.
[2] Still taken from a video on C-SPAN.
[3] Taken from Wikipedia Commons (Obama White House/Public Domain).
[4] Taken from Wikipedia Commons (Gage Skidmore).
[5] Taken from Wikipedia Commons (David Ball).
[6] Taken from Wikipedia Commons (US Treasury Department).

[NyIndy]

Is Bachmann not running?

[Atlas Has Shrugged]

Is Bachmann not running?

That’s coming up in the next few updates.

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

Dude, attributions.

[erſatz-york]

Dude, attributions.

He has attributed all of his images, as far as I can tell.

[OSR stands with Israel]

Is this really a What-If given the fact that the Trump Show is currently airing in our timeline



Looking forward to this though

[Morgan Kingsley]

Is this really a What-If given the fact that the Trump Show is currently airing in our timeline



Looking forward to this though

Well it will almost certainly have a more popular trump

[Atlas Has Shrugged]

Dude, attributions.

My bad.

[Morgan Kingsley]

Dude, attributions.

My bad.

Too much  work

[Atlas Has Shrugged]

Dude, attributions.

My bad.

Too much  work

If anything, my current system is more complicated than the common attribution method. I just find it more aesthetically pleasing.