The Crusader (Public Service Announcement)

[Former President tack50]

The headlines most definitely do not resemble the pictures lol.

[Lumine]

The headlines most definitely do not resemble the pictures lol.

LOL

Easily one of my favorite tricks, I think it enhances the satire.

[fhtagn]

I guess Jimmy and thumb didn't make it out alive after all.

[Lumine]

Fire and Fury in Atlasia

₁

Episode II: Labor Day Speech

President forgets about one term pledge

Sinks VP campaign with glorious speech

Jimmy's departure explained by Sestak through alternative facts

Rumor and intrigue runs wild across the corridors of power in Atlasia.

Having gone through half the term merely signing bills and ignoring trivialities like giving speeches or offering a vision - which of course, is for losers -, The Adam seemed to be content with his lot in life. Demographics had once again helped him to "own the Feds" and the power of "The Squad" had been drastically weakened, a triumph the President attributed to his eloquent, flawless call upon the women to leave the game and go home. And in the most shocking and stunning development since Yawning Yankee proclaimed the Federalist Party would only be dissolved over his dead body, Vice President Jimmy (seen as a reassuring figure which tempered down the brashness of The Adam) was preparing a presidential run of his own. Thinking victory against the controversial nominee defeated by the President last time as inevitable, Jimmy prepared for the glorious day in which he too would own the Feds.

The Vice President, however, was doomed upon the moment the President re-entered Discord again (a platform in which The Adam's comments have been most controversial), and suddenly realized it was his Vice President and not him who was going to fight the next election. The Adam, so we're told, was beyond infuriated at the notion of a different standard-bearer from his own party, and upon asking he was reminded by his terrified staffers of his famous one term pledge, tacit support for Jimmy's bid and the fact that he had ruled out running unless there was a complete collapse. The Adam would have none of it, dismissing this as FAKE NEWS and preparing to deliver his own speech on Labor Day, a speech that would not only crush the President's enemies, but end the small problem of his low-energy VP.

Lo and behold, The Adam rose in Nyman like a promised Messiah to deliver his brilliant and manic LABOR DAY SPEECH, arguing that: "Jimmy is a nice man, but he is low energy. We need a high energy President. And what's this about a former Fed as Vice Presidential candidate? Sad!", and announcing a run for yet another term as President, presenting it exactly as it was: as a noble decision for the good of the country. The Vice President, shocked at this betrayal and determined to make a stand, bravely resolved to suddenly drop out of the race as his Labor comrades swiftly altered the campaign banners and the billboards, and then refused to acknowledge Jimmy had ever run for President. Some, ever loyal to the President and his glorious leadership, even denied having known Jimmy at all.

Of course, this wasn't enough for "The Squad", the Yankee Deep State and the Fake Crusader Media, all of which outrageously and falsely pointed out their fake narrative of the Vice President having been suddenly and brutally knifed by his own President. The Adam, unwilling to let these lies stand, summoned the brilliant spin doctor Kellyanne Sestak - currently reported MIA by the GM's Office -, and demanded alternative facts to correct this nonsensical narrative from the unpatriotic Radical Right. The spin doctor delivered, skillfully pointing out to the Feds that it was nonsensical to think the President's glorious announcement had anything to do with Jimmy's sudden departure minutes after said announcement, arguing the Vice President's real intention was never to run for President and those who believed he had run were dirty liars.

Truly, the President and spin doctor agreed, the Feds had been owned once again.

______________________________________________________________

^{1.) Original Image:
President Donald J. Trump displays his signature on an Executive Order to place further sanctions on Iran Monday, June 24, 2019, in the Oval Office of the White House. (Official White House Photo by Joyce N. Boghosian), Wikimedia Commons, modified for arguably unfunny Atlasia satire.}

[P. Clodius Pulcher did nothing wrong]

Very disappointed that Griffin appears to have an old "UNITED STATES ARMY" flag in his office, instead of a "REPUBLIC OF ATLASIA ARMY" flag.

[GM Team Member and Senator WB]

Very disappointed that Griffin appears to have an old "UNITED STATES ARMY" flag in his office, instead of a "REPUBLIC OF ATLASIA ARMY" flag.

treasonous!

[Terry the Fat Shark]

When will the corrupt Lumine media report on the ongoing dispute over the Bill of Rights in the South? Many in the South appear to believe a bill of rights means making the text more right wing! Some have said the Yankee deep state is planning to rig elections in Fremont in order to also make the region more right wing, but this has been unconfirmed by reputable sources such as Breitbart and Drudge Report, so we can't confirm it either. Will the Corrupt Lumine media please let us know if this is fake news or not?

[Southern Senator North Carolina Yankee]

When will the corrupt Lumine media report on the ongoing dispute over the Bill of Rights in the South? Many in the South appear to believe a bill of rights means making the text more right wing! Some have said the Yankee deep state is planning to rig elections in Fremont in order to also make the region more right wing, but this has been unconfirmed by reputable sources such as Breitbart and Drudge Report, so we can't confirm it either. Will the Corrupt Lumine media please let us know if this is fake news or not?

The only thing I am going to be rigging in the near future is most likely going to be power generation because of this damn storm.

[Terry the Fat Shark]

When will the corrupt Lumine media report on the ongoing dispute over the Bill of Rights in the South? Many in the South appear to believe a bill of rights means making the text more right wing! Some have said the Yankee deep state is planning to rig elections in Fremont in order to also make the region more right wing, but this has been unconfirmed by reputable sources such as Breitbart and Drudge Report, so we can't confirm it either. Will the Corrupt Lumine media please let us know if this is fake news or not?

The only thing I am going to be rigging in the near future is most likely going to be power generation because of this damn storm.

We all know you used HAARP to generate the hurricane as a distraction to Yankee deep state activities!

[Lumine]

Captain Pericles LIVES!

Found safe and sound in Fremontville
President nominates hero as VP
General Zod-tagn and Federalist Rogues' Gallery are livid

₁

_____________________________
^{1.) Original Images:
Senator Doug Jones, Senate Democrats, Wikimedia Commons, modified for arguably unfunny Atlasia satire.
2.) Original Image:
Free stock photo of comic, superman, Mike Navolta, modified for arguably unfunny Atlasia satire.}

[Lumine]

A Tribute to the First Minister

It was in June 2013 that Maxwell decided to run a most curious poll, one whose concept was both trilling and memorable, an initiative that I found myself vaguely remembering not long ago and which was found through the search function some minor difficulty. The idea was to poll the younger - or then prominent - generation of Atlasians as potential candidates, asking voters to choose three that would make a good President. Against significant competition - though few of them remain in the game -, it was then Senator-elect Scott who topped the poll, 46% of those who responded expressing their belief he would make a good President.

And it is perhaps one of the interesting things about our Republic that many promising individuals, many of which with long and distinguished careers, never reached the top office. It matches real life very well, and it affects men and women - like Scott, Siren, Superique and others - who during my early days in the game seemed like inevitable Presidents on account of their skill, or empathy, or brilliance. These have been great contemporaries I've had the privilege to play the game with, to share experiences, to run with or against them, and in this case, perhaps to outline a thought or two on their careers.

By the time I joined the Republic as a simple citizen, Scott had more than a year and a half in the game, and a distinguished career as a public servant. I only started to know him personally during the fascinating days of 2013 as someone who seemed to share my near-permanent distate for a two-party system, as in the aftermath of the slow and agonizing death of the mighty Liberal Party he founded the unforgettable Light Party, a political vehicle that dared to be different, that set out an interesting course which removed itself from the predictability of a dull axis between the binary alternatives and, I suspect, the mediocrity which bothers so many of us even when we ourselves fall into it.

Of course, there is no such thing as the perfect player, nor is there a point in attempting to paint anyone as such. Scott, as he himself noted, could fall into harsh fights with a rival or two. But in his behavior, in his performance in office and in the efforts he helped lead he displayed one of the most special and valuable traits a player can possess: he cared. About his region, about his party, about his friends, about the game, and successfully led both the old Northeast and the new Fremont, served the Republic from the Senate and the Cabinet, and has altogether seemed like one of the individuals the game needs the most: those who will work tirelessly for the good of the Republic.

His hopefully temporal departure is indeed just cause for sadness. But it should also be a cause for celebration of his service to the game, and for remembering the good that can result from the presence of a player who has been with the Republic for, if calculations are correct, more than eight years. It is my sincere hope, as I believe it is the hope of every citizen of the Commonwealth and the nation itself, that he will prevail over the very real and very serious struggles that so many face, and that he will do so with the commendable bravery that characterizes him.

Personally, I cannot let the opportunity go without at least celebrating a player of skill and decency who deserves not only respect, but sincere gratitude over his personal and political contributions.

[Southern Senator North Carolina Yankee]

We couldn't even get Superique into the Senate (because certain centrist voters preferred a known to them Labor sock to a centrist from the wrong side of the tracks because back then personality divides on the left spilled over into the center too). Would have loved to have had him as President.


Scott/Superique would have been on the level of a Duke/Cincy, but alas politics.

[P. Clodius Pulcher did nothing wrong]

Well said!

Aside from that, we should being back more polls like the one in that screenshot!

[The world will shine with light in our nightmare]

Thank you for this lovely tribute, Lumine.  I really am touched, and I too have enjoyed the time I've gotten to share in the game with you.

[Lumine]

Election Weekend Special

Atlasia Decides, February 2020

Lumine: Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Today we announce the return of The Crusader, back from a hiatus of a few months. Following the tradition of The Political Tracker, we will be offering coverage of the February 2020 Election starting now and until Monday, a special that should involve updated results, some commentary (within reason), and interviews from relevant Atlasians who wish to comment on the election as it develops.

This weekend will feature elections for the Presidency, House of Representatives, Fremont, Lincoln and Southern Senate, Fremont First Minister and Parliament, and the referendum on The Democracy is Not For Sale Amendment; a combination of mostly competitive races that should feature some interesting results. Our first interview is coming in the next few minutes, so welcome, to the Election Weekend Special.

[Lumine]

Lumine: Our first interview will be with none other than President Pericles, running for reelection tonight.

An interview with President Pericles:

Lumine: Mr. President, a pleasure to speak to you today. We’re on the eve of yet another Presidential Election, the second in which you’ve lead a major ticket and the first you face as an incumbent President. Mere hours before the vote starts, how do you feel about the election?

Pericles: I'd say I feel cautiously optimistic about the election. The indicators I'm seeing are positive, and there seems to be broad support for my progressive vision for Atlasia. I think it helps that Adam Griffin did a good job as President and most people are satisfied with how he did. I'm also proud of how, despite a competitive primary, the Labor Party has managed to come together. That said, after my experiences in Atlasia I am always a bit paranoid leading up to elections. It is also a bit unhelpful that expectations are set extremely high for my performance, which is the downside of having a great result like we did last October. In any case, as I've repeatedly emphasised, us in the Labor Party and the left must not be complacent but put in the effort, make our case and if we do that I think we'll get a strong result.

Lumine: If you had to describe this whole campaign in a single word, which would you use?

Pericles: I'm going to be brutally honest and say 'disappointing'. That's not a reflection on my campaign or how it is doing, but I am thinking in terms of good game play and a vigorous debate for the public. I feel that this election has been overly personality focused and seen too many personal attacks with not enough policy debate. In particular, the Federalist Party has combined two big complaints about them-that they run on vague personality cults rather than policy, and that the more recent one that they're not trying properly and giving 100% effort. This cycle, unlike usually when they are guilty of one but not the other, I believe they are guilty of both critiques. While it is gratifying that both major tickets support the present policy approach, voters should probably have more choice in their elections. For the second cycle in a row, their ticket has formed very late, and this time too late for even a presidential debate. And more broadly public campaigning is becoming rarer and decreasing in importance, which I see as a sad development. So what can I do about it? Well, I've run an active, public campaign. I've laid out my policies clearly for voters and set out the choice in this election. And I am pushing the same points in PMs as I do in public. I lead by example in this area, and hopefully in the future we can have competitive, policy-focused elections.

Lumine: For the past few months you’ve been serving as Griffin’s Vice President. Now having held the office, do you feel the Vice Presidency is working well? Do you think there are any changes or reforms that should be done to that office?

Pericles: The Vice Presidency is a hard job, as I expect you know, and it requires a strong commitment. I don't see it as being structurally flawed though, and while I'm open to reforms there are none currently that I plan on making and I don't necessarily see a need for reforms. One thing I do want to add though is that the Vice Presidency and Congress function based on the activity levels of the Vice President. I provided great activity to it, Peanut is also providing great activity too and I expect him to be excellent in this role over the coming term. However, I do worry about the consequences for Congress and for the game if we elect an individual who has a worse activity record than weatherboy as Vice President. I believe that voters need to weigh this up and it would be wrong of me not to raise this valid concern.

Lumine: By the latest numbers of the Census Bureau, the Labor Party is exactly three members short of having 50% of the game’s citizens. Is this a positive or a negative development for Atlasia? And if so, why?

Pericles: Having served as Labor chair recently, and being the dominant leader of the Labor Party, I am incredibly proud and pleased at the success our party has achieved. It's because of the hard work we have put in and because we are offering what most Atlasians want-active, progressive leadership. I also disagree with people trying to rubbish our success, with claims that we just lied to voters in PMs and even more absurdly using the excuse that "it's a left-wing forum" (which we all know was not enough to put it in the bag for the left in the past). Perhaps the game would be better off if it were more competitive, but honestly Labor has every right to give elections and policy our absolute 100% effort. We have set a tough challenge for other parties, but ultimately I am sure that they will find a way to meet the challenge. For historical perspective, we are only at a reverse October 2017 in the election cycle. So I would say it's a positive development for Atlasia, and I'm proud of helping achieve it, but those who think it is a negative development can have some assurance that eternal Labor dominance simply isn't going to happen.

Lumine: And on that note, what do you make of the present situation of the right?

Pericles: Well, I'm reluctant to give too much away here because I don't want to help the right out too much. That said, my opinion is that the Atlasian right has become too extreme. They naively assumed that they could coast on personality based campaigns forever and voters wouldn't know or care about what they actually stand for, however over the course of several months the impression of them as far-right did sink in. Gradually they have lost votes as a result. If they were to run a centre-right campaign, that did strike a clear contrast, with a credible candidate, that would be their best move. I'm thinking of something like the campaign you and tmth ran last year, and I've said that the Federalist Party is not the centre-right party of Yankee and tmth anymore. Also, as Labor has put in the hard work, so does the right. I won't specify what exactly that involves, but I think what they haven't been doing is obvious to their party leadership. As I emphasised before though, the right is not dead and will come back eventually.

Lumine: Assuming you were to win a full term by Monday, what do you think will be the biggest challenge of a Pericles White House? And what would be the biggest priority?

Pericles: It seems to me that in Atlasia it's pretty much always that people are more excited and committed for electioneering than governing. So I do have an ambitious agenda for my presidency, and I need people to remain committed to passing it into law. I've seen Presidents come and go, some good, some bad, and I've learned from their presidencies. I'm absolutely determined to make the most of the opportunity of a full term, if the voters choose to elect me. As for my biggest priority, well there are three big ones-action on climate change, income inequality, and gun violence. If I have to pick one, I'll go for climate change. This is because of how it is so important, the threat to the planet is so great and we have such a narrow window of time to stop it being completely catastrophic.

Lumine: Suppose for a moment you could instantly change a single thing about the game, regardless of whether it would be feasible - or even possible - to do in RL. What would you change?

Pericles: I would make it so that every voter makes their decision by viewing the Fantasy Elections boards, paying attention to what candidates do and say and judging them based on their platforms. I'd much prefer to have that than the game dominated by zombies on Discord who don't really care about the game, don't take it seriously and just vote for their friend or whoever mildly amuses them. I think the public campaigning aspect of the game is pretty cool and we need more effort and attention devoted to it. We can only get that though if both voters and candidates make that a priority. Sadly, I am pretty sure this won't happen, and instead things will probably get worse in this regard, as an ever smaller share of the electorate actually pay attention to the game. I've done my best to publicly lay out my case and policies in a serious way, and to also involve Labor members further in Atlasia. Laborcord is a big, positive community and has some benefits in that regard. However, there is only so much I can do here.

Lumine: I do think this is the third interview we’ve had thus far. The first was right after your first presidential run, the second when Labor was starting its revival to the detriment of PUP. Obviously, quite a lot has happened in nearly two years. As you look back on your career, what is your proudest moment?

Pericles: That's a tough one. I'll go for the October 2019 election results. It was truly an incredible achievement, I am very proud to have been part of it as Griffin's VP and part of the Labor leadership. I was so elated, as the left and therefore I think Atlasia too have come so far in recent months. It was a resounding endorsement of what we had done since the very tight June election, and it enabled me to serve effectively as Vice President and for Labor to continue moving Atlasia forward. I am proud to say furthermore that Griff and I have vindicated the trust the voters placed in us. We now need to stay on track by voting for Pericles/Peanut.

Lumine: And on that note, what is your biggest regret?

Pericles: To be honest, I do have quite a few regrets. I think the biggest one was that I did make mistakes with my campaign in February 2018 and so failed to win that election. My performance was a good one in the context of the time, and it did begin the left-wing recovery. However Atlasia deserved better than more right-wing government, and back then I did have a positive vision for change that would have improved the game. At the very least, I think I would have done a better job than weatherboy. Also, a win in that election would have prevented the divisions in the left of mid and late 2018, and made PUP the dominant party of the left. That would have kept the team from then together. I also think that as a more selfish reason, a win then would have gone down better historically than any win for me now-in that it would have been seen as a more shocking and impressive result. On the other hand, one can never be sure of how things would have gone differently. And one thing I have some confidence in is that I am more ready for the presidency now and a full term for me now will be better than a hypothetical full term for me in the past. And more broadly, there are plenty of other regrets, but I have reflected on and learned from my mistakes.

Lumine: Any final words at the end?

Pericles: Ok, I'll just say this. We are on the right track now as a nation. We have active leadership, with reasonable progressive policy-making. I want to build on the achievements we've made in the last 8 months and go further, so that we start the 2020s strong. My fundamental vision is of a game where everyone has the opportunity to succeed, where if you work hard you can get ahead and that our middle class prospers instead of being squeezed. Through better safety for our citizens with gun control, protecting our future and national security with climate action, and most directly with action on income inequality to create a fairer tax system and help hard-working Atlasians, everything links into this vision. I will work very hard for you, to get it done. So let's stay on track and vote for a brighter future with Pericles/Peanut. Best of luck to everyone in the coming elections, and I hope you all have a fun weekend. And finally, thank you very much Lumine for this interview, and of course it is great to have you back in Atlasia.

[Lumine]

Lumine: Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. It’s time for Friday’s coverage to start, and we have our first results; some twelve hours hours after the polls were opened:

Federal Turnout:
16,25% (39 voters)

Presidential Election:

Koopa: 35.9%
Pericles: 35.9%
HCP: 20.5%
Hillgoose: 7.4%

House Election:

Write-in: Cinyc: 25.6%
Razze: 15.4%
Leinad: 12.8%
Write-in: Lumine: 12.8%
ReaganClinton: 10.3%
Roblox: 7.7%
LouisvilleThunder: 7.7%
Blair: 5.1%
Elcaspar: 2.6%
Thumb: 0.0%
Young Texan: 0.0%

Senate Races:

Fremont:

Scott: 100%

South:

LouisvilleThunder: 68.2%
MB: 31.8%

Lincoln:

Tack50: 75.0%
Poirot: 25.0%

Fremont House of Commons:

ASV: 36.5%
Ishan: 27.3%
Koopa: 18.1%
Meepcheese: 18.1%

Constitutional Amendment:

Fremont: YES: 80% / NO: 20%

South: YES: 46% / NO: 46% / ABS: 8%

Lincoln: YES: 43% / NO: 43% / ABS: 14%

Lumine: Turnout is barely above 15%, but these are quite interesting results. President Pericles seem to be under perfoming at the moment as challenger Koopa maintains a virtual tie with the incumbent, with HCP polling a more than respectable 20% and Hillgose remaining in fourth place. The picture becomes more positive for the Labor Party when it comes to the Senate in light of strong performances by Tack and by the unchallenged Scott, although as of this moment the Southern results would represent quite a reversal as LT surges ahead strongly in the early vote.

The House is harder to read on account of the large number of candidates, but thus far the "opposition" vote is far ahead on the popular vote, and the write-in candidacy of Cinyc appears to be a stellar success as he leads the vote, followed by a strong second place in Razze and with Leinad and Lumine fighting for third. Leaving asidde the Fremont House of Commons - which can expect all of its candidates to be elected -, the Constitutional Amendment appears to be struggling with only a strong positive vote in the Commonwealth, both the South and Lincoln featuring an uneasy tie.

[Lumine]

Lumine: We have our second interview of the weekend, this time with Southern Governor West_Midlander. Let's have a look at what he had to say:

An interview with Governor West_Midlander:

Lumine: Mr. Governor, thank you for joining us. Among other things, the South is seeing quite a fascinating result for Senator and for the Constitutional Amendment. What do you make of these results thus far?

West_Midlander: Granted, it's still very early in the vote. I think the amendment is doing as expected in the South. I saw in The Crusader that LT is doing well in the early results. I expect the result for Senate to be close, though I don't know who will win. I am surprised, however, that the amendment is struggling in Lincoln where the nays and ayes are tied. I would have expected the amendment to be favored in that region.

Lumine: And in federal terms, any thoughts on the battle for the Presidency and the House?

West_Midlander: I think Pericles and Labor are favored for the Presidency and the House, respectively. A significant section of voters are splitting their tickets, so how things turn out exactly; we'll have to wait and see. I approve of almost all the House candidates, on both sides of the aisle. We have a lot of talent in the running to serve the country this weekend.

Lumine: I think it would be fair to say that your change in registration has led to a controversy as of the last few hours. Now, you were in the Federalist Party once, what would you say was the biggest factor in returning to it?

West_Midlander: As was the case when I was last a member of the Federalists, the party is very welcoming regarding diversity of opinion. The party is a genuine big-tent, spanning from Southern Conservatives to as some would describe him, "centre-left" Congressman ReaganClinton. I will not go into specifics out of respect for my former partisans. In short, I think I will be able to more freely express my views within the Federalist Party.

Lumine: Some officeholders have been very critical of you personally. What would you say to them?

West_Midlander: They can say what they like. My views have not changed. I will continue to put people and region above party in honoring the oath I took to defend the Constitution of this region and our country.

Lumine: Being more specific, PSOL has not only advocated for your recall, but also implied a parallel government should be set up, or that the federal government should take action. What do you make of this?

West_Midlander: This is an unfortunate circumstance because I had thought PSOL and I were on good terms particularly due to my involvement in his causes including the ACLO, which he is the former Chair of. In my view, recall is fitting when an officeholder violated his or her oath of office, which is not the case here since the issue at hand is my party registration. The second proposal would be, I think, an unprecedented move in reaction to an officeholder changing parties. Though, I don't think either proposal will come to fruition.

Lumine: As February rapidly comes to an end, how would you describe your tenure leading the South thus far? What do you think has been your biggest accomplishment?

West_Midlander: I have been as effective as I can be given the Chamber leadership. I loathe to call anyone out and Tim is a friend but I have called for the Chamber to move to a vote, I believe twice, on three bills each. Delegate Weatherboy has done the same on another piece of legislation. I have hesitated to do so more often in order to give the Speaker the benefit of the doubt. In the previous session, the then-Deputy Speaker stepped in when the Speaker did not fulfill his duties in a timely manner; however, that has not transpired this term (regarding the current Deputy).

I have appointed a delegate and an Attorney General, I created a regional holiday via executive order and proposed an amendment to Delegate Spark's Regional Sport Act. However, I have not had the principal act of achievement of an administration yet, signing a piece of legislation, as none has been sent to my desk. Out of these, my accomplishments, perhaps the regional holiday, Southern Adoption Day would be my favorite accomplishment in the absence of signed legislation due to the lack of passage of legislation.

Lumine: And from the opposite point of view, your biggest regret?

West_Midlander: It's not so much a regret as a disappointment in the Chamber's inactivity. My general inability to convince some delegates to be active on a regular basis is a continuation of that pattern, from them, despite my prodding (as a Delegate, then) in the previous term (even under the prior administration).

Lumine: Finally, Mr. Governor, what would you say is your single biggest priority moving forward?

West_Midlander: The priority of this administration is reviewing previously passed legislation in the pursuit of repealing or amending where necessary. In the interest of fiscal responsibility, as I said when I ran for Governor; I don't plan on any large spending programs, though I may introduce legislation to aid the Southern environment or to encourage transportation in the region. Unemployment is low nationally and regionally. Previously in the IDS, a tax credit law for small businesses was passed when unemployment was a problem; however, that is not a major issue at hand at the moment.

If I had to choose a single priority at this moment, for my administration, it would probably be the passage of the 2020 Euthanasia Ban. I noticed the ban had been repealed in a prior session of the Chamber, a long while ago. Opposition to euthanasia is a view I had held as a Laborite. Consistent with my pro-life belief is that every life is sacred and that life begins at conception, so it should not be wasted and people should not be coerced into euthanasia as occurs when that practice is legal.

Lumine: Governor West_Midlander, ladies and gentlemen. Stay tuned for further results in a couple of hours!

[Lumine]

Lumine: As Saturday moves ahead - we'll be forced to delay detailed results until the night -, we do have two consecutive interviews, with Lincoln Chancellor Jimmy and with former President Fhtagn. Here's what we discussed:

An interview with Chancellor Jimmy:

Lumine: Chancellor, welcome to the studio. An almost mandatory question to start with, what are your thoughts on the current election results?

Jimmy: It's too early to say what the outcome will be, but I think the left has a slight advantage heading into the weekend. I have been a strong supporter of Pericles since he announced his run for President and I am encouraged by the results that he will be our next President. Senator Tack50 looks to be on path to win reelection.

Lumine: You were among those who voted against the Constitutional Amendment. What would you say are your objections to it, and do you think Lincoln will end up voting against ratification?

Jimmy: I voted no on the amendment because I view it as a major opening towards the rights of groups to have their free speech rights being limited. The goal is noble towards reducing the impact of big money in politics, but it leaves to opening towards the majority party using this to find ways to limit the fundraising abilities of the minority party(ies) or candidates, while allowing their supporters to continue giving them money. I do expect it to be ratified however.

Lumine: In your time in Atlasia you have held quite a few offices already, including the Vice-Presidency. What has been your favorite office to hold thus far, and why?

Jimmy: It's true that I have held basically every office at this point except the Presidency, Senator of any of the three regions, and Southern CoD. Personally, I feel the best office was my first, when I took my seat in the Lincoln Assembly in January of 2018, after first joining in December of 2017. However, the most productive I think was my tenure in the House. I hold the distinction of being the only Speaker to be elected non-concurrently since the reset in 2016, as the 6th and 9th Speaker of the House, totaling over 9 months of service in the House. Serving as Vice-President had a different feeling of responsibility, since the federal legislature would be completely stalled if I wasn't active enough.

Lumine: A controversy has erupted in the South concerning Governor West_Midlander, one in which you have commented elsewhere. Any thoughts you’d want to share on this?

Jimmy: While I was not really shocked that the Southern Governor switched parties, with his appointment of fhtagn as Attorney General for the region, it still came to a surprise to many. Especially after such a close election where party members including me directly or indirectly helped his campaign, that lead him to winning. I'm sure many of his voters or supporters feel betrayed at the fact as I do. What West_Midlander should have done was resign to face a special election, just like Senator Vern did last year after changing parties. In the situation that he still wins the election, at least he now has a mandate to govern the Southern Region with the support of his new party.

Lumine: What is the single biggest challenge that Lincoln faces right now? And do you have any plans to address it in some form?

Jimmy: The biggest challenge Lincoln has right now is finding ways to reduce poverty, and helping those who have low-paying jobs that can barely can afford to live. A plan for UBI has been proposed, which I oppose and I will explain why next, but I look forward to finding solutions that will actually work at achieving the goal of making Lincoln the best region for workers and everyone else to live in. I have been looking at reforming Lincoln's income and family assistance programs to make them more effective so that those who need help are not unable to receive it or receive enough due to requirements that don't account for the economic and living situations of individuals and households beyond gross income.

Lumine: Chancellor, UBI has emerged as a policy proposal which has drawn some interest among officeholders. Now, you have expressed your opposition to it, but I’d like to delve a bit deeper. What you think would be the problem with UBI? Would your biggest objection be ethical/of principle or in practical terms?

Jimmy: There are several issues I have with implementing a universal basic income (UBI), both on the regional and federal level. Besides the incredibly large cost of doing so, there is also the great risk of labor participation decreasing, since is the chance some people would decide to just try and live off the UBI, especially in a household where multiple people are receiving UBI payments. This would be disastrous. And then there is the unavoidable inflation that will result from people receiving UBI payments, which will result is price increases on goods, and thereby reversing any gains from having the extra money. All this makes me see UBI as not the solution to poverty and low-wages in Lincoln or at the federal level.

Lumine: There’s talk in Lincoln regarding moving the council elections to coincide with the federal midterms. What would be the advantages of this for Lincoln?

Jimmy: Having the council elections moved during the federal midterms will make sure that voter turnout is at its highest. It will also create more uniformity in the Atlasia election schedule, which is helpful for newbies and everyone in general.

Lumine: A final question, Mr. Chancellor. Is Lincoln on the right track? And do you support its current system of government?

Jimmy: I think Lincoln is holding steady police-wise and activity has been pretty good this council. Regarding the current system of government, while I did vote for the Philly Plan referendum, as many know I am not a big supporter of it anymore and I am not opposed to going back to the assembly system; I support at least making important reforms to it, since I think the system Fremont is better, coming from someone who also served in their legislature.

Lumine: Thank you, Chancellor, a pleasure to talk to you.

An interview with former President Fhtagn:

Lumine: Madam President, a pleasure to interview you again.

Fhtagn: Thank you for taking the time to interview me this weekend, I'm glad to be doing this again, and glad to see you back in Atlasia.

Lumine: Quite an interesting set of results we’re seeing. Do you have any thoughts on the election thus far?

Fhtagn: Certainly some interesting results, especially since it seems the left expected the right to do nothing this election. As far as my thoughts, personally, I think this election is going to send a clear message to the current administration that they don't quite have all the support they think they have, and hopefully it reminds them that they can't get away with trying to force through their agenda without the people willing to hold them accountable.

Lumine: Perhaps one of the most significant decisions of the past few weeks has been your announcement that you would not seek reelection to the House. What would you say was the biggest factor in this decision?

Fhtagn: While it may come as a surprise to the public, behind the scenes, the right has known this for quite some time, as I've made my intentions clear about my plan to take a break to some leaders as far back as October, explaining to a few more during December's elections. The biggest factor in my decision to not run was my desire to take some time to put real life ahead of the game. There will be a month long period during the next Congress in which there are a lot of things that take priority for me over Atlasia, and I feel that it would be a disservice to those who have long supported me to take office and either be on a leave of absence or barely online fighting for them during this time.

Lumine: Looking back, what are you proudest of when it comes to your time in the House? What do you think is your biggest regret?

Fhtagn: I think one of the things that makes me most proud is knowing that all the work I put in for the right as a Congresswoman wasn't for nothing, and still managed to inspire others to fill in the gap that would otherwise exist, and I look forward to seeing what that means going forward. There aren't really a whole lot of regrets that I have from this time around. While not all of my bills ended up becoming law, a lot of what I set out to do was achieved in some ways, be it actual legislation passed, or being effective opposition against a side that made clear they want to silence those who disagree with them.

Lumine: As you know, the Labor Party is soon to approach a record 50% of the voters as part of their membership. Is this good or bad for Atlasia, and if so, why?

Fhtagn: If you combine Labor and Peace (which they've made clear they are the Labor Party), they're effectively at that already. I don't really believe that's a good thing for Atlasia, as it continues to provide this false idea to leaders on the left that they have the right to silence anyone who isn't on their side. Unfortunately, the forum itself is very left wing, so it's to be expected. Hopefully as the year goes on and this being a presidential election year in real life, we can expect to see at least a little more diversity.

Lumine: To put it bluntly, the Atlasian right has not had a positive last few months. What would you say has been the biggest problem? Is there a bright future out there for the right?

Fhtagn: I think the biggest problems have been getting organized and motivating people to get involved and get active. We are at a point where most of the new talent has unfortunately entered at this time where the left has regained dominance, and it has only seemed to crush their hopes and caused them to give up early. Meanwhile, what few organizers are left are among older players, some who may be burned out, some who may he busier than they used to be, and some who may be facing those same feelings new players are. As far as looking into the future, luckily it seems that 2020 is hopefully going to turn things around for the right and make things more competitive. We had a very close Southern Governor race in January, where Labor only won by 1 vote, and this election is looking to be more competitive than expected on all sides.  Even if this doesn't end up in a victory for the right this month, it is my hope that this energizes them to keep pushing and see that things can change. And as I mentioned earlier with it being a presidential election year in real life, hopefully the forum manages to draw in some new users that could potentially become new talent in this game.

Lumine: It wouldn’t exactly be controversial to note that you haven’t had a very positive relationship with President Pericles. Do you have any thoughts on his Presidency thus far?

Fhtagn: So far, there really isn't much to say about this presidency at this time because nothing meaningful has been done. However, if this does become another Griff presidency as he's publicly claimed it will be, we can expect nothing meaningful to get done over the next 4 months.

Lumine: There has been something of a scandal lately given the change in party registration of Southern Governor West_Midlander. What do you make of this situation?

Fhtagn: West_Midlander is under no obligation to remain a member of the Labor Party or it's satellite Peace Party. Even back in 2017, West_Midlander and I have discussed issues with toxic behavior in the Labor Party, and it wouldn't surprise me if nothing has changed, and I wouldn't blame him for leaving if that was the case. I do feel bad in the sense that he could have felt some pressure over appointing me as the Southern Attorney General, as things seemed to escalate the most after that incident, but I applaud Westy for putting his values above his party. There certainly aren't enough people these days willing to do so. It truly shows that he had the best of intentions in his run for Governor. While I did not vote for him, and we certainly have quite a few differences, and have even publicly had strong disagreements, I can respect that.

Lumine: Now that you’re leaving office, do you have any plans for the future in the game?

Fhtagn: Well, unless Westy decides to fire me sometime soon, I am still the Southern Attorney General, and am in the middle of defending the South in a Supreme Court case. My main focus for now is going to be on that job, as it's something I feel I can handle given my limited availability happening soon. As far as further down the road, I can't say what my plans are for sure, but I can promise I will be back eventually.

Lumine: Former President Fhtagn, ladies and gentlemen. Hopefully we should be reporting on further results and additional interviews later on.

[Lumine]

Lumine: Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Let's have a look at how the non-federal results stand first, with less than twelve hours left until voting ends:

Senate Races:

Fremont:

Scott: 100%

South:

LouisvilleThunder: 57.1%
MB: 42.9%

Lincoln:

Tack50: 57.7%
Poirot: 42.3%

Tack50: 65.4%
Poirot: 34.6%

Fremont First Minister:

Truman: 100%

Fremont House of Commons:

ASV: 56.3%
Ishan: 18.7%
Koopa: 12.5%
Meepcheese: 12.5%

Constitutional Amendment:

Fremont: YES: 67% / NO: 20% / ABS: 13%

South: YES: 55% / NO: 42% / ABS: 3%

Lincoln: YES: 56% / NO: 40% / ABS: 4%

Lumine: The Senate remains more or less static in terms of the vote, and although both Poirot and MB have made gains during the last few days both Tack and LT hold a clear advantage over their rivals. We won't be making calls in The Crusader, but the Lincoln incumbent and the Southern challenger appear favored as of this moment. The Constitutional Amendment has also pulled ahead in all regions, and it does appear unlikely that it will be defeated in any of those at all. Finally, an interesting set of results in Fremont: despite very low turnout as of now, ASV is dancing his way into triumph by garnering over 50% of the vote for the House of Commons, a most encouraging result. No credible challengers have emerged for Scott and Truman, and their election and reelection does appear to be a foregone conclusion.

[Lumine]

Lumine: Now, as to the Federal results:

Federal Turnout:
42,50% (102 voters)

Presidential Election:

Pericles: 45.1%
Koopa: 32.4%
HCP: 16.7%
Hillgoose: 5.8%

House Election:

Write-in: Cinyc: 15.7%
Razze: 14.7%
LouisvilleThunder: 13.7%
Write-in: Lumine: 11.8%
Roblox: 8.8%
Blair: 7.8%
Elcaspar: 7.8%
ReaganClinton: 6.9%
Leinad: 6.9%
Thumb: 3.9%
Young Texan: 1.0%

Lumine: Deep into the final day turnout is barely over 40%, suggesting the final turnout numbers will be rather low even accounting for a last minute voting surge. President Pericles has pulled ahead of his challengers and is now sitting at 45%, but would still be forced into a second or probably a third round before achieving a potential majority. The House itself has become a close battle between each challenger, only one or two votes separating most candidates. All in all, we expect a fascinating closeness between several House candidates right until the end.

[Lumine]

Lumine: Additionally, we have a new guest on our special! Please welcome Speaker of House Thumb:

An interview with Speaker Thumb:

Lumine: Mr. Speaker, good to have you here. As the election progresses and given what we’ve seen thus far, how do you feel about your chances?

Thumb: It doesn’t seem likely that I’ll be re-elected from the results we have so far. Turnout has been low and I don’t know how many votes are being withheld by either side so there is still a decent chance.

Lumine: And what do you make of the results in general? Have they been predictable or surprising to you?

Thumb: Pericles being re-elected and a 5-4 Labor majority was what I was expecting to happen and that seems to be what is happening, so I’m not too surprised at that. I think a lot of what happened before the campaign started was more interesting, up until a week ago, the right was very silent and there wasn’t even a Federalist candidate in the Southern Senate race. Then, there was a sudden burst in activity. There have also been some interesting crossover votes on the presidential level with many left wingers voting for Koopa and many right wingers voting for Pericles. My view of the results is somewhat mixed. I think Pericles is an experienced politician who I think can do a good as president so I’m happy that he’s been re-elected but I’m disappointed that a hardworking senator like MB could lose to someone who hopped over from Lincoln 5 minutes ago.

Lumine: Mr. Speaker, you’ve led the House for the past six weeks. How would you define the latest legislative session, and, do you have any thoughts on what the Speakership has meant to you?

Thumb: I think that decent progress has been made in the last congress. This has been a good session especially for workers’ rights including the right to unionize (including for temporary workers), a repeal of the Taft-Harley Act and a bill with strong bipartisan support which pushes for improved workers rights around the world and also helps protect Atlasian workers from unfair competition. The house has also passed bills protecting consumers from vicious abuse from cowboy parking companies and adding PREP prescriptions to Atlascare. Contribution to and quality of debate is still fairly thin, though I think it has been improving gradually. As speaker, I’ve run things efficiently from an administrative standpoint and I’ve tried my best to bump things and hopefully allow for bills to be properly discussed.

Lumine: You have championed the idea of campaign finance reform. Now, one of the arguments levied against the constitutional amendment being voted on is that it may have little practical effect. Others argue the opposite, that it may have too much of an effect. What would you say to them?

Thumb: To the point that the amendment will have little practical effect, it won’t immediately. The amendment ensures that regulation of campaign finance is constitutional, but it doesn’t in itself make any regulations. After the amendment passes we can think about what those regulations should be. I think a good next step would be to restore the McCain-Feingold Campaign Finance Reform Act in full, with strong limits on donations and spending. Beyond that, my preference would be a “democracy dollars” sort of system where people are given vouchers which they can use to donate to campaigns, parties, causes ect. To the point that this would go too far, I think these claims are a little alarmist, nobody has said that there should be a complete ban on money in politics. When people talk about money in politics, they are talking about thousands, hundreds of thousands, millions (and even billions) of dollars spent, not an ordinary person donating money to political causes and candidates they support – the power of the small dollar donor would actually significantly increase as their contributions won’t be drowned out by much wealthier donors. You could point to an extreme scenario where its possible that limits on donations could go too low, but there is always a risk whenever any problem is solved but that doesn’t mean you should sit idly by. Given how clearly detrimental unlimited money in politics has been, its worth passing this amendment even if there is a remote risk.

Lumine: This amendment does seem to be "struggling" in two of the three regions. Do you think it will be ratified? And if was not, what do you think that result would mean?

Thumb: I think it will be ratified because it has strong bipartisan support and I think that many people across the political spectrum understand that unlimited money in politics has had a very negative impact on political discourse and understand that when someone donates millions to political causes, it is a piece of leverage which incentivises politicians to be more interested in the interests of some people over others because politicians generally don’t bite the hand that feeds them. If the amendment is defeated, it means that unlimited money in politics will simply continue and it will continue to erode the quality of debate and efficiency of government.

Lumine: It’s been two years since you joined the game. What have you found most enjoyable about Atlasia, and what has annoyed you the most?

Thumb: I think what I’ve found most enjoyable is being able to share my perspective and bring ideas to the table. I’ve enjoyed debating and advocating for what I believe in. What has annoyed me is things that stand in the way of that, particularly the hyper personality-based politics and strong influence of discord. When people are forming alliances and political relationships based solely on friendship, I think its inherently bad for a game that is about policy and politics.

Lumine: Mr. Speaker, you have spoken about the need for a more flexible education system and for getting rid of standardized testing. Could you offer some details on what you think should be added – or could be added – to testing and to the education system? What’s missing?

Thumb: My main issue with the education system as it is, is that it often operates as an exam factory where students are taught to take tests, rather than a genuine education process to prepare young people for the real world. There are many important skills that are left out including critical thinking, creativity and vocational skills – and standardized testing doesn’t really measure these skills very well. One way we can improve education is by having a wider range of assessments that students can take, including more project-based learning either creating or researching something, work experience and practical exams. Students have a wide range of skills and I think that assessments and the education system should reflect that. Some students are good at walking into an exam and acing it in a couple of hours, some students are very good at working diligently on a project over a month or so, and other students aren’t as good at writing but are excellent at building and operating things or problem solving. I don’t think that any of these students are less intelligent than each other, but a one size fits all testing system will make a judgement there. This is to the benefit of students, who’ll have a chance to demonstrate a wider range of skills and will benefit the economy and businesses which want and need a wider range of skills.

Lumine: Gun to your head, Mr. Speaker: is Atlasia on the right or the wrong track?

Thumb: Policy wise, some good bills are being passed, so on that front I’m optimistic. In terms of the game in general, I’m not too sure. I think a lot of the issues the game has come into recently are more a reflection of the state of politics IRL than a problem that is inherent to the game. There has been a decline in debate in the last couple of years, people seem a lot less willing to actually argue their points which I think is pretty bad for the game, but this is gradually improving as I noted earlier. On balance, I’d say its on the right track.

Lumine: Thank you for this interview, Mr. Speaker.

[Lumine]

Lumine: Voting is over! Here in The Crusader we're too bad with numbers so as to accurately describe the House and Presidential results - though we can safely state President Pericles has been reelected to a full term -, so let's have a look at the other results for now:

Pericles REELECTED

Senate Races:

Fremont:

Scott: 100%

Scott ELECTED

South:

LouisvilleThunder: 54.1%
MB: 45.9%

LouisvilleThunder ELECTED

Lincoln:

Tack50: 62.5%
Poirot: 37.5%

Tack REELECTED

Tack50: 74.2%
Poirot: 25.8%

Tack REELECTED

Fremont First Minister:

Truman: 100%

Truman REELECTED

Fremont House of Commons:

ASV: 55%
Ishan: 20%
Meepcheese: 15%
Koopa: 10%

ALL FOUR ELECTED

Constitutional Amendment:

Fremont: YES: 74% / NO: 16% / ABS: 10%

South: YES: 56% / NO: 42% / ABS: 4%

Lincoln: YES: 61% / NO: 36% / ABS: 3%

AMENDMENT RATIFIED

Lumine: There you have it, folks, we're comfortable at this moment projecting the reelection of the President, a Labor Senate majority despite losing the Southern seat, the election of all Fremont candidates, and the ratification of the Constitutional Amendment.

[Lumine]

The Crusader

March 1st, 2020

In the News:

Press F to pay respects

13 Citizens fallen after General Election,
Grieving nation mourns kind and tolerant statesman Ben Kenobi

From my cold, dead hands

Assault Weapons Ban enters the Senate,
Administration in favor, but MB and LT rally the troops for gun rights

Hail to the Speaker

Thumb strikes down Puerto Gayle and Thanos Acts
Denounced for counter-revolutionary behavior before the Supreme Court

Convention Time

Federalist Party debates platform, move towards protectionsim
Labor Party faces internal election, Tack to battle PSOL for General Secretary

Tales from Atlasland:

Pentecost in Atlasia

Stunning miracle allows DFW and others to speak in a thousand different tongues
Polish found to be the preferred choice of language among would-be polyglots
Raving lunatic found screaming to the skies, calling for DFW ban

₁

Post-Election Interviews:

An interview with Council Speaker S019:

Lumine: Mr. Speaker, good to have you here.

S019: Thank you, Mr. Representative-Elect.

Lumine: We have witnessed a very contentious election, what do you make of the federal and Lincoln results?

S019: The federal election had been surprisingly close early on, but Pericles managed to pull it out and win a major victory and has a strong mandate for his agenda. To be completely honest, Senator Tack50 struggled far more than I expected, and had the right ran a better Get out The Vote operation, I could have easily seen Mr. Poirot winning the election.

Lumine: You were among those who voted against the constitutional amendment on the ballot, which appeared to struggle in the South and in Lincoln. What is your biggest objection to the amendment?

S019: The truth is that sometimes grassroots interest groups are needed to fight for the rights of everyday Atlasians. Also bills like this can be interpreted as also serving as limits on labor unions. While the massive funding by SuperPACs may be harmful in some cases, there are definitely some benefits to it.

Lumine: Mr. Speaker, you preside over a body whose full membership is comprised of Labor Party members. Why do you think this is the case, and is it a positive thing for Lincoln?

S019: The right in Lincoln has quite frankly given up. The region's former Senator, who was a major leader of the right wing machine in Lincoln, just carpetbagged south of the Mason-Dixon Line. Also, there was a clear issue I think among moderates and independents in the electorate, when the right wing decided to write-in a candidate, who had made anti-Semitic comments. The Lincoln electorate this decided that it would rather have an inactive candidate than one who was anti-Semitic. Then, the right didn't even contest the special for that seat. After the right's shocking near-upset of Senator PyroTheFox in December, I thought that the Lincoln right had resurged. I was clearly wrong. Now regarding whether or not, I think this is beneficial, I'd just like to dispel some myths first. To begin with, that the Council is currently some type of ideological echo chamber. This is blatantly false as the Council has moderates like me and self-deceived "Blue Dog Laborite" Chancellor Jimmy7812 and some more left-wing members such as Gracile and 20RP12. Also, we have had strong activity this Council and we have active, dedicated members, and we have had dissent among members on many bills. However, it provides healthy dissent, which in my opinion is better than obstructionist opposition.

Lumine: It’s been some time since the current system of government for Lincoln was installed, one which continues to spark debate and some very strong opinion on both sides. Do you think the current system works, and if not, what would you replace it with?

S019: I support the current system. It has fostered activity and even if one opposes he current system, under the old system, the entire Assembly was recalled. That has not yet happened under this system. Also the Lincoln threads are active and we have Honorable out of region guests, such as the Honorable AustralianSwingVoter of Fremont provide advice and commentary for the region. So, I like this uptick in activity and the fact that other people come to our region to comment definitely says something about our activity.

Lumine: I think it’s fair to say that during your career you have been both associated with the center-right and with the center-left, and you recently defined yourself as a moderate. How would you characterize your present ideological stance, or where would you place yourself in the political spectrum?

S019: I am a left-of center moderate. Economically I'd say I'm between a neoliberal and a social liberal, but I also have a strong Keynesian bent. Socially, I'd say I'm very liberal on culture war issues, but I have a strong authoritarian bent on issues like drugs. So, I'd call myself a centrist.

Lumine: You have made it clear you intend to run for reelection in April, which leads me to ask, what aspirations would you say you have for your future in Atlasian politics? Do you intend to be in Lincoln for a while, or, perhaps, aspire for something higher?

S019: I'm not sure if and when I would run for higher office, and right now I'm not thinking about that. I'm thinking about how to bring activity to Lincoln and keep the region working, so my declaration for re-election is primarily based on continuing that.

Lumine: One might argue some Atlasians have been rather critical of you in terms of policy or politics. Why do you think that is, and, what would you say to them?

S019: Well, some people have criticized some of my views, and I've faced a fair amount of criticism on some issues. In some cases, it's that they themselves are opposed to the policy. With regard to those people, I'm not exactly going to be representative of the ACP's values, and if they don't like that, then they should make their voices heard at the ballot box, not by derailing legislative threads. Now some people agree with me on policy but have criticized implementation or other minor details. With regards to those people, I have tried to accommodate those requests, as I see those requests as far more reasonable

Lumine: Final question, Mr. Speaker. Who did you expect to win the election, and did you expect the Amendment would be ratified?

S019: I expected Pericles to win simply due to the registration advantage. I didn't expect the Amendment to pass the South or Lincoln early on, and I was ambivalent on whether or not it would pass in Lincoln for a while.

Lumine: Thank you, Mr. Speaker.

S019: Thank you, Mr. Representative-Elect.

Note from the Editor: Original questions were asked during the election. They have been slightly modified to better suit the context and S019's own responses.

_____________________________
^{1.) Original Image:
Pentecost, Juan Bautista Mayno, 1615-1620, Wikimedia Commons, modified for arguably unfunny Atlasia satire.}

[Former President tack50]

Knowing Suburban I kinda wonder how the actual interview went. I imagine some sort of variation on a dumpster fire?