S.17.5-28: End of Session Omnibus Governmental Reform Act (statute)

[Mr. Reactionary]

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Sponsor: Mr. Reactionary

[Mr. Reactionary]

Summary:

This omnibus bill is limited to Government administration and the like. Section 1 is official holidays and stuff like that. Section 2 is actually how the government conducts itself. Section 3 relates to revenues.

Section 1

1.) Designates the official cookie of the South.

2-3.) Protect the right of loved ones to place objects on family graves on government cemeteries.

4.) Designates the official sport of the South.

5.) Designates a month to promote Fried Chicken outside of the Region to help our reputation.

6.) Calls for a poll of Southerners to gauge interest in renaming our region JEFFERSON.

Section 2

1.) Bans polygraph tests for new government employees.

2.) Bans drug tests for new government employees in non-sensitive or non-dangerous jobs.

3.) Limits unnecessary regulations in government contracting that push up costs.

4.) Expands the scope of FOIA to government maps and related data.

5.) Sets aside 10% of government contracts for disabled persons, when possible.

6.) Requires a judicial hearing prior to declaring a government beneficiary as mentally incompetent.

7.) Calls for a commission to negotiate with Lincoln and Fremont for the mutual recognition of each others concealed weapons permits.

8.) Resolves issues related to Attorney General vacancies.

Section 3

1-4.) Is a commemorative coin program which will raise $120,000 for wildlife management.

5-6.) Caps dog/cat licensing fees and exempts certain disableds who need helper animals from such fees.

7-10.) Is a commemorative coin program which will raise $140,000 for no-kill animal shelters

 

[President Punxsutawney Phil]

I personally prefer football being made the official sport of the south.

[Mr. Reactionary]

I personally prefer football being made the official sport of the south.

American or soccer?

[President Punxsutawney Phil]

I personally prefer football being made the official sport of the south.

American or soccer?

American football

[Mr. Reactionary]

Would you settle for Football being designated our National Pastime? I'd hate for our official sport to be functionally exclusive of women.

[Unconditional Surrender Truman]

Not that my opinion matters, but I heartily support the abolition of the polygraph under Section 2(1).

[President Punxsutawney Phil]

Would you settle for Football being designated our National Pastime? I'd hate for our official sport to be functionally exclusive of women.

If there's any sport that deserves the label, it's football. It's fundamental to Southern culture in a way no other sport is.

[President Punxsutawney Phil]

Perhaps we make football and women's basketball co-official sports?

[Mr. Reactionary]

I hereby request unanimous consent to proceed with a final vote on this bill. 24 hrs to object.

[Holy Unifying Centrist]

I hereby request unanimous consent to proceed with a final vote on this bill. 24 hrs to object.

I would like TimTurner's concern to be addressed because I agree with it as well.

[Mr. Reactionary]

I hereby request unanimous consent to proceed with a final vote on this bill. 24 hrs to object.

I would like TimTurner's concern to be addressed because I agree with it as well.

The National Pastime part?

[Holy Unifying Centrist]

I hereby request unanimous consent to proceed with a final vote on this bill. 24 hrs to object.

I would like TimTurner's concern to be addressed because I agree with it as well.

The National Pastime part?

Yes.

[Mr. Reactionary]

I hereby request unanimous consent to proceed with a final vote on this bill. 24 hrs to object.

I would like TimTurner's concern to be addressed because I agree with it as well.

The National Pastime part?

Yes.

Section 1, clause 5

[Holy Unifying Centrist]

I hereby request unanimous consent to proceed with a final vote on this bill. 24 hrs to object.

I would like TimTurner's concern to be addressed because I agree with it as well.

The National Pastime part?

Yes.

Section 1, clause 5

I would prefer TimTurner's suggestion of making football and women's basketball co-official sports, but I won't be that grumpy over it.

[President Punxsutawney Phil]

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kentucky_Wildcats_women's_basketball
Based right here in the South!

[Mr. Reactionary]

OK. With football as the regional pastime now, I once again seek unanimous consent to proceed to a final vote on this bill. 24 hrs to object.

[Mr. Reactionary]

Unanimous consent is achieved. Final vote lasting about 82 1/2 hrs, closing Saturday right before midnight.

[Mr. Reactionary]

Aye

[President Punxsutawney Phil]

Aye

[Lechasseur]

Aye

[Mr. Reactionary]

Bill passes. 3-0-0; 4 not voting.