The Nyman Questioner (DFW BOMBSHELL)

[Mike Thick]

I was a Federalist bigwig during the first Congress. The excitement about controlling everything gradually turned into frustration with Congressional inactivity (particularly from the dearly departed tmth). I distinctly remember saying to the guys something about how we had focused too much on ideological balance and not enough on their actual ability to do well in a legislative body -- activity, general knowledge, ability to play nice with colleagues and leaders, etc. I don't even remember who our guys were, and that doesn't even begin to encompass the whole situation, but was kind of emblematic of the problems we faced post-reset: to fill the new federal jobs created by the ConCon, everyone had to promote people with limited Atlasian experience to important positions at a time when experience was needed more than ever.

[Mike Thick]

Opinion: Nuke Nyman
By Ted Bessell

Our country is in crisis. While President Dfw won over 60% of the vote nationwide, he got 0% in Nyman, the center of our nation's lawmaking. Similarly, the Federalist slate of Congressmen received no votes there -- despite Federalist politicians being only slightly less socialist than those on the other side of the aisle. The waters of the Potomac are like the urine of Satan after he forgets to flush, leaving a brownish film over our capital city and corroding the hearts and minds of our nation's leaders, while creating a gnarly smell as Real America is bathed in an ocean of the globalists' swampy yellow fluid. We need to clean our country's messy toilet -- with a nuclear bomb.

Yes, I know what you're thinking. Wouldn't this cost millions of innocent lives, Ted? How would America's economy and government survive a nuclear attack on its capital city? How could you be such a f**king monster? I will answer your question with a question: can you take the pole out of your atheist ass and go back to drinking halal avocado toast lattes in your Prius while Twittering about "homosexual rights" and "diversity?" Real Americans are at work here, and we want change -- change from atoms into unbound subatomic particles.

First of all, "drain the swamp" is a common phrase in American politics today -- but what you may not know is that it refers to the common practice of digging channels in swamps to get rid of mosquitos. However, times are changing, and there are more modern methods of moving water -- like, for example, converting it into a superheated cloud of radioactive steam. Our nation has always been a global technological leader, and there's no reason that we shouldn't do it now.

This country needs a change. A change of leadership, a change of setting, and a change of pace. And, we ask you this -- what better way is there to bring our nation's leaders closer to their constituents than turning them into radioactive ash that will blow west -- towards their constituents. Nuking Nyman is the best way, the only way, to restore our nation.

[Mike Thick]

A big news story coming soon.

Oh boy