Office of the Attorney General

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

Scandalous. We need more trials, no less.

[Southern Senator North Carolina Yankee]

He is a defense attorney primarily, what do you expect?

[Türkisblau]

I do like the drama of trials.

[Lief 🗽]

The reign of terror is over! Bravo Comrade Attorney General!

[Lincoln Republican]

Now this is an Attorney General who knows what he's talking about.

Great work! 

[Filuwaúrdjan]

The Department of Justice is currently undertaking a wide-ranging review of the Republic's extraordinarily ineffectual criminal justice laws with the object of replacing them with something non-horrible. The DoJ aims to have finalised draft legislation on the subject by the end of the week, after which we hope it will be introduced to the Senate for approval. I must stress that this review is largely technical in nature.

[Filuwaúrdjan]

Work on this has been somewhat slower than anticipated, but we're getting there. Please have patience.

[Poirot]

I'm sending a message via carrier pigeon because I am hiding.

I ask the Attorney General to charge Reality or Nothing for the murder of Jeffrey Brown of the Confederate Council since they have claimed responsibility.

This would be good for the people on the list like myself who are on the death list of the Confederate Council. I am falsely accused of encouraging a death. So please, charge the people behind the Brown death so justice can be served.

[Filuwaúrdjan]

Well the post electoral funk is over, finally. And the great work is finished and currently being reviewed by the President: it will be presented to the Senate immanently.

[Filuwaúrdjan]

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[Filuwaúrdjan]

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[Filuwaúrdjan]

Anyway, I hope to have the above bill introduced by a willing Senator shortly. It is simple, it is logical, it protects the rights of the defendants (which barely exist under current law) and it eliminates several troublesome loopholes.

[Filuwaúrdjan]

The present situation in the Pacific Region is a threat to both the stability of our Republic and on the democratic principles upon which it was founded. It is with this in mind that I have to regrettably announce that I have issued warrants for the immediate apprehension and arrest of Pacific Justice Ebowed and Senator-elect Türkisblau for treason.

[Simfan34]

I also would like to appeal for a writ of habeas corpus.

[SUSAN CRUSHBONE]

The present situation in the Pacific Region is a threat to both the stability of our Republic and on the democratic principles upon which it was founded. It is with this in mind that I have to regrettably announce that I have issued warrants for the immediate apprehension and arrest of Pacific Justice Ebowed and Senator-elect Türkisblau for treason.

[Southern Senator North Carolina Yankee]

Wait, is Turk's appointment as Senator being questioned too?

[Filuwaúrdjan]

Formal charges have been filed against Ebowed and Türkisblau. Requests were made to this department to additionally charge several other citizens (namely Adam Griffin and Bacon King) but the Department of Justice takes the view that the evidence provided is sufficiently scanty in these cases that prosecution would not be in the public interest.

[Filuwaúrdjan]

Formal charges have been filed against North Carolina Yankee. It is time that those who are responsible for destroying this great game of ours are held responsible for their criminal actions.

[Classic Conservative]

Formal charges have been filed against North Carolina Yankee. It is time that those who are responsible for destroying this great game of ours are held responsible for their criminal actions.

What did he do, or is this a political witchunt?

[Filuwaúrdjan]

The Department of Justice believes that Senator Yankee has committed many and various heinous crimes over the years and that the sum total of them is treasonous. However we also have very specific evidence for certain charges.

[Southern Senator North Carolina Yankee]

Labor promised us a an end to witch hunts when they took the White House and installed this joke as our Attorney General. 

Now we have someone who actually has committed all the crimes he is accusing me of falsely, doling out treason charges on a basis of personal bias and fabricated evidence.

I have never supported or aided any treason or terroristic acts. I have never committed terrorism and I have always supported federal supremacy of the law and even took an administration to court to uphold it.

This is a gamble against my time. He is going to throw this out there, dig up a bunch of posts and force me to spend hours refuting this nonsense, pulling me away from all other areas of attention as part of a deliberate strategy to achieve their objectives regarding the game.

[Leinad]

Wow...this is farcical...

So, Yankee is charged with fake treason...could someone refresh our collective memory on Reality or Nothing? I wasn't around yet back then, but if I've got my history right, someone we all know and love had something to do with that...

And notice: he still hasn't mentioned this "very specific evidence!!!" In the past few weeks there's been countless mentions of how terrible Yankee is, but NOT A SINGLE SUBSTANTIVE FACT!!! Holy Toledo, this makes literal witch-hunts look like legitimate exercises in criminal justice!

[DKrol]

Will charges be brought against Governor TNF for his open and public attacks on the federal government?

[Leinad]

Will charges be brought against Governor TNF for his open and public attacks on the federal government?

If only we had a government official whose job it was to bring charges against people for stuff like that...

[Senator Cris]

Unbelievable.