can't really blame the real syria refugees who are rarely ever in the news.
I don't. If I were Syrian, I would absolutely do the same and move to Sweden (or Austria, or Germany, or the Netherlands), and so would every rational human being. I blame countries in Europe for not closing their borders.
I agree with your core arguments, but the refugees are not really winning much sympathy from me when they make the very arrogant claim that we have a duty to help them. The thought would never cross my mind in the event that some liberal's wet dreams come true and Trump actually collapses America that I'd be entitled to shelter in Canada. But assuming I got turned away, my natural gut instinct after heading north would be to somehow go east or west until I am someplace where I know I'm not imposing.
Maybe I'm an extremely anxious person who is just constantly ill at ease. I'd like to think that my thought process on this is normal though. Unfortunately though I can't seem to find any of that "guest anxiety" in the most vocal activists working among or on the behalf of the fleeing Syrians from the media reports I've seen.