The Unwed and Teenage Mothers Protection Bill

[Bono]

OMG
*pulls out gun and pull it to head. conceals it again, after realizing how much a mistake it would be to leave them alone*

[Bono]

Do you think we allready have too much teenage pregnancy? Well, thighten your seatbelts, because we are going off to a teenage pregnancy party if this bill pulls trough. This effectively encourages our teenage girls to both sin against God in Heaven, ang ruin their lives on earth. By subsidizing teenage pregnancy, we will only get more and more teenage pregnancy, until no town, no neighbourhood, no street, no FAMILY is safe. Where we, mature, reasonable people see a destroyed life, teenagers will see a blank check for all the irresponsabilty, all the immorality they want in their lives, because after everything comes craching down to pieces, after our girls have been left pregnant by their runaway boyfriend, left to be dropouts from highschool, and otherwise forced, due to their irresponsability and immorality, by divine justice forced to suffer the consequences of their acts, big brotehr government will be there to offer them a dandy life, with child care à la carte, all provided by the Atlasian Taxpayer, the greatest dopey in the face of the earth.  You know, Zach Stevenson is a School Superintendent up in Massachusets. He lives in Boston and travels allover the area. He was telling me teenage pregnancy is so rampant in some of the schools in Massachusetts that have Lamaze classes instead of SexEd classes. Now think about it. Think about that issue. How is it that that's happened to us? Do you want even more of that?

[Bono]

Do you think we allready have too much teenage pregnancy? Well, thighten your seatbelts, because we are going off to a teenage pregnancy party if this bill pulls trough. This effectively encourages our teenage girls to both sin against God in Heaven, ang ruin their lives on earth. By subsidizing teenage pregnancy, we will only get more and more teenage pregnancy, until no town, no neighbourhood, no street, no FAMILY is safe. Where we, mature, reasonable people see a destroyed life, teenagers will see a blank check for all the irresponsabilty, all the immorality they want in their lives, because after everything comes craching down to pieces, after our girls have been left pregnant by their runaway boyfriend, left to be dropouts from highschool, and otherwise forced, due to their irresponsability and immorality, by divine justice forced to suffer the consequences of their acts, big brotehr government will be there to offer them a dandy life, with child care à la carte, all provided by the Atlasian Taxpayer, the greatest dopey in the face of the earth.  You know, Zach Stevenson is a School Superintendent up in Massachusets. He lives in Boston and travels allover the area. He was telling me teenage pregnancy is so rampant in some of the schools in Massachusetts that have Lamaze classes instead of SexEd classes. Now think about it. Think about that issue. How is it that that's happened to us? Do you want even more of that?

Your view on this is quite warped.  This bill won't encourage anyone to get pregnant.  Why is it that we assume that a whole bunch of people are suddenly going to want to get pregnant because the government is willing to give them just what the need to get by?  Sure, there are scam artists, but the bill takes care fo that pretty well, I think.  Your just paranoid, Senator.

I never said doint it on purpose. But tenagers are, generally and to be frank, dumb, and hormone-driven, and will see this just as one more blank chack, aside from the one our moral stone-age society has given them, to engage in any kind of sexual behaviour they want.

[Bono]

And as for sinning against God, would you rather they have an abortion and sin even more?

It's the principle of it.

[Bono]

CAN WE HAVE A VOTE ON MY BILL NOW, PLEASE?

There's a huge qeue.

[Bono]

Nay for the record.

[Bono]

VETO please

Ditto.

+1