The Onion sums up Paul Ryan pretty well

[I spent the winter writing songs about getting better]

http://www.theonion.com/articles/14yearold-congressional-whiz-kid-balances-budget,31666

You can't say he's never reminded you of this with how he looks and all.

[Indy Texas]

I picture 14 year-old Paul Ryan as the protagonist in a made-for-TV Disney movie. The other kids make fun of him but then he, along with his dog who follows him everywhere, exposes the mayor of his small town for accepting bribes from an evil real estate developer who wants to bulldoze a sweet old lady's house.

And then he grows up and gets elected to Congress and devotes every waking minute of his day to making sure the evil real estate developer pays as little in taxes as possible. The dog was later hit by a car.