Hashpipe's Great Biotimeline

[Hash]

November 1, 1962
Keyser campaign headquarters
Montpelier, Vermont

Keyser is talking with his campaign manager, Paul Fisher.

Keyser: What are the post-debate things saying?
Fisher: Our teams are pretty worried, the common wisdom seems to indicate that the debate was a tie or even a Garrett victory.
Keyser: Garrett didn't win! I owned him. On taxes, on my record, on his lies, on Rutland, on everything! Everything. I beat him. Those who say that he won are clearly delusional.
Fisher: The thing is, Governor, our groundwork indicates that Garrett has motivated Democrats, and my sources indicate that his strategy depends on low turnout and demotivating our voters.
Keyser: Democrats are delusional, so it makes sense that they were motivated by that delusional jerk.
Fisher: But, Governor, if we want to win, we need to motivate our voters.
Keyser: Listen to me, Fisher. I want to defeat that opportunistic little twerp, and not only do I want to beat him, but I want to trounce him and destroy him once and for all. I'll consider it my service to this state. So you find a way for me to beat him, whatever means necessary.
Fisher: Is it not too late?
Keyser: You're the goddamn campaign manager, so you find a goddamn way to destroy him.
Fisher: I do see a way... it would need to focused solely on our voters to motivate them, at least to the level of Democratic motivation.

[Hash]

November 3, 1962
Garrett campaign headquarters
South Burlington, Vermont

A worried and panicked Steve Thomas walks in to Chris Garrett's office at the campaign headquarters, and harbouring a worried look on his face, places a piece of paper under Garrett's eyes. Garrett takes a while to read the paper, re-reads it, stays silent for a moment before violently taking the paper, scrunching it up and throwing it across the room in a fit of rage. The paper in question read:

Congressman Chris Garrett - Democratic candidate for Governor

...

-Has struggled with alcohol abuse and continues to be a noted alcoholic (as cited Burlington Free Press)
-Has been absent for most crucial votes in the House for the past 6 months, leaving
-Taught Marxist theory to college students when he was a professor

-His irresponsible spending plan will raise taxes
-Wants to concentrate all political power in the hands of big cities

Stay safe. Protect Vermont values. On November 6
VOTE REPUBLICAN
VOTE FOR GOVERNOR KEYSER

Garrett: What the fuck is this shit!!!???
Thomas: We've caught Keyser's surrogates dropping a bunch of this lit in the rural counties and small towns. Apparently his strategy is to motivate his base's turnout while conceding larger cities to us.
Garrett: The alcoholism bullsh**t again?
Thomas: McClure is cheering him on and he's ecstatic about getting the story back in the limelight.
Garrett: Is this a major threat to us?
Thomas: Yes, yes it is. We need to control this, we need to mitigate the effects of the lit drop.
Garrett: For Christ's sake. That lowlife. I'll go get his ass. Get me on the road to somewhere, tell the media, tell the newspapers. I'm gonna go after that sh**tbag Keyser. I'm going to destroy him.
Thomas: Where do you want to do this show of yours?
Garrett: I don't give a sh**t. Not in Burlington, Keyser will say that I'm a fucking big city guy. Let's go to some small town. Not too far, because I hate going out to the loonies.
Thomas: I'll find you something.
Garrett: Let me be clear. I want to win this goddamn election. I need to win this stupid election. I don't care what it takes, how long it takes, but I want to win. I need to win. I want to destroy Keyser.

Michael Peterson walks in

Garrett: What now?
Peterson: Not to disturb you, sir, but Philip Hoff's campaign called. They'd like you to go out and campaign for him.
Garrett: What the hell? Who the hell does he think he fuing is? I have a goddamn mother fuing campaign to run right now. I'm not on vacation. I'm not running around visiting dumps with 10 swivel-eyed maple syrup peddlers for fun. Go tell Philip Hoff to go fuck himself. I'm the only Democrat in this state who's worth a damn. I'm the only one they ought to be concerned about. I can win. Hoff can't. Tell him to go screw a goat.
Thomas: Tell him that we're busy and on damage control. We apologize that we won't be able to.
Garrett: Yeah, tell him we apologize for RUNNING A FUCKING CAMPAIGN!
Thomas: Chris, please, calm down.
Garrett: Why should I? I've worked my ass off for this job for the past six months, I've run around to the most isolated villages and frozen my ass off in stupid churches talking to unresponsive baboons for months. And after all this, that moron Keyser thinks he can steal this from me? I'm going to kill him.

[Okay, maybe Mike Johnson is a competent parliamentarian.]

Oh God, I hope to God Garrett pulls this off...

[homelycooking]

Next time Garrett and Keyser meet, Garrett gives Keyser "the kiss of death" and screams, while his aides physically restrain him, "I'LL BURY YOU, YOU F--KING SCUMBAG!"

[Hash]

November 4, 1962
Garrett town hall rally
Jeffersonville, Vermont

Staged in Jeffersonville's old church, Chris Garrett holds his rebuttal rally in front of a crowd of some 200 voters from Jeffersonville and the surroundings. A crowd of journalists have also congregated, hoping to get Garrett to answer to some of the allegations laid on him by Keyser.

[...] Apparently Governor Keyser is getting desperate. He's been running out there, organizing lit drops which have no place in this campaign. Literature which spreads disgusting, despicable lies about my character and my platform. Instead of running on his merits, if he has any, or running on his supposed accomplishment; he's chosen to run a scare campaign which is insiduous and despicable.

I understand him, though. When your only record is a terrible one, then you can't run on it. But this election is about this state's future. It is about your future. It is about making our state a proud and strong state once again. I've never attacked Governor Keyser's character. I've never attacked him on a personal basis. I've attacked his record, yes; I've attacked his governance, yes; but I have never and will never attack his character. You folks deserve answers to your problems. You deserve better than Keyser's disgusting and lowly attacks on my character.

I expected better coming from him. The good people of Vermont have never liked negative campaigning. Let's show Governor Keyser what we think of his tactics.

Journalist 1: Congressman, is is true you continue to be a noted alcoholic?

Garrett: No, no, no. Of course not. That's ridiculous. It is unfounded, it's a lie. I've never battled alcohol abuse, and I'm not an alcoholic. I have no alcohol problem, I made this clear back in the spring. Keyser is using this as a ridiculous attack on my character to distract attention from his pathetic record of ruin. From his incompetence at what he does. Anyhow, what proof does Keyser have of this? Besides whatever it is McClure feeds to him with so much enthusiasm.

Journalist 2: Have you been absent from critical votes in Congress for the past six months?

Garrett: Look, I'm running for Governor, so, uh, obviously I haven't been in Washington every day... but, uh, I can guarantee that I've been present for the crucial votes and that I have vowed to remain a strong representative for Vermont until my term ends in January.

Journalist 3: What do you have to say about the allegations that you taught Marxist theory to college students?

Garrett gives the journalist an irritated look, before sighing and passing his hand on his forehead. He gives out a big long sigh before opening his mouth.

Garrett: Let's see... I've heard lots of ridiculous things in my life. Stupid things even. But nothing comes as close to ridiculousness and stupidity than that statement. I've faced this lie since 1958. It's been used by every opponent of mine since then. And at this point I'm pretty tired of it. But I'll say the same thing I've always said to that. As a professor at UVM, I taught my students about the different streams of thought in modern political philosophy, Marxism included. I've never been a Marxist, and I have certainly never told anybody that Marxism is any kind of a superior ideology or what have you. I've been over this countless times. It still has no place in this campaign, and that Keyser is using it just shows how lowly is campaign is and how desperate he is. Vermont deserves better than this sad, pathetic display of politicking by Keyser and his ilk. Jesus Christ.

Journalist 4: What does Governor Keyser mean when he says that you "want to concentrate all political power in the hands of big cities"?

Garrett gives out another long sigh.

Garrett: I don't know, ask him. I didn't write that stupidity. I suppose he's trying to play on urban and rural differences to create an artificial schism between two parts of this state, pitting one bunch of voters against another. It's disgusting. It has no place in this campaign, and if anybody is playing a dangerous game of pitting urban versus rural, it's him, not me. He's been trying to do that since Tuesday. And it's as ridiculous now as it was on Tuesday.

Thanks for your time today, folks. You've been great. We'll meet on November 6 to take this state back! God bless you all!

Garrett walks off stage, brushing past a throng of journalists and onlookers. He rushes straight to the corner of the old church where Steve Thomas his standing.

Garrett: How'd that go?

Thomas: You did great, Chris. We can just hope the journalists are honest and spread the word. We'll soon see anyway.

[Hash]

November 5, 1962
Keyser campaign headquarters
Montpelier, Vermont

Governor Keyser is at his lowest ebb. His mood fluctuates between anger and depression. He is talking with his campaign manager, Paul Fisher, the man behind Keyser's last-minute negative mailer against Garrett which Fisher fears has backfired with less than 24 hours left to go. Keyser will hold a final large rally in front of his supporters in Rutland later that day.

Fisher: Governor, I fear that the mailer has backfired.
Keyser: How?
Fisher: The press, besides McClure, hasn't taken favourably to it and Garrett's rebuttal rally yesterday was staged to perfection. I think he gave us back the mailer and it could blow up in our faces.
Keyser: For Christ's sake Paul! You fucking idiot! You told me it would work. You guaranteed to me it would work. And now it backfired. It was your decision, Paul, you screwed this fucking thing up!
Fisher: You signed off on it!
Keyser: Don't fucking bullsh**t me, Paul. You told me it would work. It didn't. Now deal with the goddamn consequences of your decision.
Fisher: I... sir... uh... I think you're gonna deal with the consequences, with all due respect...
Keyser: *sigh* Oh, for the love of God. You screwed this up. We could have won. If we lose, it's gonna be because of your stupid decision.
Fisher: I apologize sir.
Keyser: You better apologize. I'm gonna be a fucking elder statesman at 35. That's gotta be the youngest age for a goddamn elder statesman in the country. What am I going to do?
Fisher: Sir, I apo-
Keyser: Shut up when I'm speaking. I can't lose tomorrow. I can't become a retired elder statesman at my age. You better write up some damn good speech for me tonight, so I can have one last final shot at killing Garrett.
Losing to Chris Garrett? Do you even understand the fucking implications? Me, losing to a goddamn opportunistic twerp? To a fucking Marxist academic! A Marxist! For heaven's sake. This isn't Moscow. You can't lose to a goddamn Marxist. But because of you Paul, I'm gonna be the first American incumbent to lose to a goddamn Marxist college prof! And I'll be retired at 35!
Fisher: Sir... the race isn't over yet...
Keyser: I hope to God it isn't. Or else I can go sell goddamn maple syrup to tourists.

[Okay, maybe Mike Johnson is a competent parliamentarian.]

I think it's cute how he thinks he'll be remotely well-regarded enough to be an 'elder statesman' after leaving office.

[Hash]

November 5, 1962
Keyser campaign rally
Rutland, Vermont

The incumbent Governor, placed in difficult straits after a poor debate performance and a mailer which backfired on him, is making his final plea to voters less than twenty-fours before polls open. Standing in front of a crowd of some one thousand Republican supporters in Rutland, Keyser is trying to motivate his base to turn out and convince fledgling independents to place an X next to his name in a few hours time.

[...] Fellow Vermonters. We stand at a critical juncture. There are two clear choices in this election. On the one hand, you can choose strong governance, low taxes, business and job growth, sound financial management and strong Vermont values. On the other hand, Congressman Garrett promises a dangerous and ruinous road of tax hikes, reckless spending, regional strife and irresponsible governance. The choice is clear. We've made so much progress in the past two years. We've balanced a budget, restored sound financial management to our government, never raised any taxes, created a booming environment for businesses and stimulated job growth. Vermont is growing, and we can look upon our future optimistically.

It's no time to change horses. Certainly not when the alternative is a man who would take this state down a dangerous, very dangerous, path. A man of doubtful morality and a man who has reneged his duty as Congressman in the grubby, opportunistic pursuit of political power.

Tomorrow, the choice is clear. Vote Republican.


November 5, 1962
Garrett campaign rally
Barre, Vermont

Following a strong debate performance, the insurgent Garrett faced a potentially crippling mailer from his opponent's campaign, but staged a very successful rebuttal town hall-style meeting which ended up boosting his campaign. With less than twenty-four hours to go, Garrett and his staff are upbeat and optimistic. To match the Governor's last minute rally, Garrett chose to give his last rally in front of traditionally Democratic voters in working-class Barre. Some 600 Democrats showed up to hear their party's nominee.

There is much more at stake in this contest than electing a Democrat or Republican as Governor. This election is more than just that. This election is about change. As our country roars forward with energy, determination and optimism; our state cannot lag behind stuck in the illusory comfort of archaic old ways and traditions which are holding us back. Governor Keyser isn't the problem by himself, he is the latest incarnation of the problem, which is one hundred and nine years of single-party rule which has bred only complacency and blindness to the problems faced by this state.

Governor Keyser himself has proven either willfully oblivious to the challenges we face or downright ignorant of them. He can boast of a phony surplus and his cozy ties to big business all he wants, but none of his words can hide the reality. Our rural regions are falling behind, and it is unacceptable. Our educational system is in shambles and it is rife with flagrant inequalities which prevent all our children from getting the same education wherever they may live. Our state government is a bloated machine which is floating in waste, inefficiency and corruption. Our core democratic institutions are no longer even remotely representative of the people they serve. We are held back because our leaders comfort themselves in the illusions of the old ways and the old traditions.

But, my friends, we are not doomed to this future. Vermont is a great state, and our traditions of independence, resourcefulness and initiative are stronger than ever. Let us tap into the strength of our people, our greatest resource, and renew the promise of this state. The future begins tomorrow, my friends. Vote for change!

[Atlas Has Shrugged]

Im cant wait for the election results

[Hash]

November 6, 1962 - 7:30pm - Poll Closings +0:30
Chris Garrett's house
Burlington, Vermont

Garrett's campaign team, fearing the standard-fare pessimism which is to be expected of Garrett on every election night, have confined him at home and, through his wife, made sure that he gets no hold on the early results. He is spending the early evening playing around with his kids, Ethan Lawrence, 9 and Samantha, 3.

Ethan Lawrence: Daddy, why are you all dressed up tonight?
Garrett: Daddy's gonna give a speech tonight.
Ethan Lawrence: About what, daddy?
Garrett: It depends... it depends a lot...
Ethan Lawrence: Depends on what?
Garrett: You see, Ethan, daddy is running in an election, because daddy thinks he can be a good governor for this state. Today, the people voted and I'm gonna see soon enough if I beat that dips-
Lucie: CHRIS, YOUR LANGUAGE!
Garrett: Sorry, Lucie..... If I can defeat the incumbent piec- Governor.
Lucie: Chris, please. Watch yourself.


November 6, 1962 - 8:30pm - Poll Closings +1:30
Garrett campaign HQ
South Burlington, Vermont

In Chris Garrett's absence, his campaign team is crunching the numbers from towns as they come in.

Thomas: Mike, what are the numbers showing?
Peterson: We're down some 600 votes in Bennington County, but Bennington hasn't come in yet, so we might catch up there. The margin in Chittenden is solid, we could get something up to a net of 5000 or so, even more. Rutland is great, we're getting a bigger margin than 1960 there.
Thomas: Good... good... what's the state-wide margin?
Peterson: We're losing big on the Democratic line only, but we're doing well on Crispe's ballot line. Overall, combined, I think we trail by 1,600 or so votes. I think we can catch up on that, but we need to win Bennington and reduce Keyser's lead in Windham on the back of Crispe's line.
Thomas: What is left to count in Chittenden?
Peterson: Burlington is in, but I don't think Winooski has reported yet and neither has Colchester.
Thomas: That sounds solid... Winooski should net us a lot, Colchester too...
Peterson: I also got word out of Lamoille that Garrett lost Belvidere but is winning in Cambridge... I...
Thomas: Damn, did that speech go down well there or what?! Whatever. It doesn't matter. We need to find 1,600 votes.
Peterson: Chittenden might come down to a 5,550 gap, but it'd leave us short... I think we can net 700 votes out of Bennington in a best case situation.
Thomas: I hope for our sake we don't lose by a hair. Chris is going to unleash sh**t on us if we lose this election, and he's going to commit a massacre.

[homelycooking]

LOL, Belvidere. It's got what, two dozen voters? Garrett's going to be pissed that he lost the asbestos vote.

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

I swear the god I'll keep bumping it from time to time, until you finish this great saga.

WHO'S WITH ME?

[Atlas Has Shrugged]

X Chairman Sanchez

[Hash]

I'm really busy these days, and when I'm not I'm lazy or something, so I can't update this in the near future but I certainly haven't forgotten about it.

[Hash]

I'm back from Vermont and Garrett's biotimeline is back from the dead!

November 6, 1962 - 9:30pm - Poll Closings +2:30
Garrett campaign HQ
South Burlington, Vermont

Steve Thomas briefs Garrett on the state of the race, which remains too close to call, two hours after the poll closings.

Garrett: Give me the big picture here guys. Good or bad?
Thomas: It's pretty good - about as good as 1960 for you - but we're looking at a mixed bag when we crunch it down by county and town.
Garrett: OK, are we up or down now overall?
Thomas: We're up by a sustainable and solid margin as of now, but a recount is still possible.
Garrett: I don't want any fucking recount. Stafford had class, the guy's a real gentleman who knows when to concede when he's lost something. On the other hand, Keyser is an asshole and a power-hungry maniac who is probably willing to kill somebody to win. If there's a recount, we can't expect Keyser to play nice with us, he hates my guts and I hate his.

Michael Peterson rushes into Garrett's study, looking excited, waving a piece of paper

Garrett: What's going on, Mike?
Peterson: The last numbers from Chittenden and Bennington counties!
Garrett: And?
Peterson: Looking really good, looks like we'll be getting a 6000 vote margin out of Chittenden, which is more than what we estimated. It's looking great. In Bennington, I've had reports that we could a actually be winning the whole county by 100 votes!
Thomas: And we're really holding the margins down in Orleans and Caledonia, Keyser won't even be getting 52% in Caledonia.
Garrett: All I know about those counties is that they're boring as hell, what did we manage there in 60?
Peterson: Something like 39% in Caledonia!
Garrett: That's crazy, I'm feeling optimistic...
Peterson: But Washington County is looking pretty bad, you're losing everywhere outside of Barre and Montpelier basically, it's certainly lower than in 1960 there...
Garrett: Damn it.
Thomas: Cheer up, Chris, Rutland is pretty strong as well.

[SUSAN CRUSHBONE]

AWW YEAH!

[Hash]

November 6, 1962 - 10:00pm - Poll Closings +3:00
Capitol Plaza Hotel - Keyser campaign HQ
Montpelier, Vermont

Meanwhile, in a dimly lit suite at the Capitol Plaza Hotel, in Montpelier, Governor Keyser's inner circle are crunching numbers on their side. Campaign manager Paul Fisher and Lt. Governor Ralph A. Foote are with him.

Aide 1: Governor, it's not looking very good for us, I'm sorry to say.
Keyser: Goddamn it! Goddamn it! How the hell can this entitled son of a bitch be winning this goddamn election? Fucking Burlington, damn it.
Foote: How are my numbers looking?
Aide 1: No worries, Mr. Foote, you're winning reelection with a margin similar to 1960.
Foote: Oh, excellent.
Keyser: Oh, go fuck yourself. Ralph, if you're going to be an asshole, you can leave the room.
Aide 2: We're projecting that you might lose by over 2500 votes. I don't think we can't really make this up, sir.
Keyser: Oh, damn it. I'm not calling that entitled idiot to concede anything, ever.
Fisher: With all due respect...
Keyser: Look, I don't care. Garrett is a little twerp, I'm not calling his entitled ass tonight or any other day.
Fisher: Do you want to ask for a recount?
Keyser: I don't care, but I'm not going to call him.
Foote: Governor, be a good sport...

Keyser turns red.

Keyser: A GOOD SPORT? A GOOD FUCKING SPORT? This man shat all over me during the past months. I know what Garrett calls me behind my back, Garrett is a smug elitist city-dwelling scumbag, I'm not calling him. Case closed.
Aide 3: Sir, if I can insist... you've lost the election, go out there and concede the race, and call him. You'll need to work with him during the transition.
Keyser: Don't remind me. Why am I surrounded by a team of incompetent fools?
Aide 1: I have news that they've called the race for the Congressman, sir. We should concede.
Keyser: Godddamn it.

Keyser takes a long sigh, for a brief moment he looks sad and his face perks down, but suddenly he lifts his face up, still boiling red with anger.

Oh, fine, but I won't call him. Goddamn it. What did I do to lose this stupid election? Why did I lose this election? I was a good goddamn Governor, I balanced the budget and all that stuff. It's all because of that stupid legislature, so full of it that they couldn't stomach a young guy like me who didn't just sit down and sleep in office. But, no, Garrett can keep dreaming. Not calling him.
Foote: You'll only make things worse for all Republicans...
Keyser: Why should I care? The Republican Party is filled with assholes, what did they do for me this term? Nothing, in fact, that goddamn Auditor General contradicted me in public and morons like Crispe and Simpson openly campaigned against me! The House and Senate is filled with career politicians who decided to sh**t all over me and my ucking office during the past two years, so forgive me, goddamn it, if I don't lose any sleep about how the Republican Party is going to fare after this night from hell.
Foote: Look, Governor, it's terrible you've lost, but you need to accept it, call him up, quickly, and congratulate h-
Keyser: No, no and no. I won't congratulate him.
Fisher: Frank, stop fooling around, for Christ's sake. Call him and get it over with, just give him the damn call. Jesus Christ.

Keyser is startled by his campaign manager's blunt and stark comment. He sinks into a chair, and seems reflective for a brief moment.

Keyser: Fine, fine. I'll call him. Give me the stupid phone, goddamn it.
Aide 1: Governor, the President pro-tempore of the Senate, Asa Bloomer, is on the line.
Keyser: No, no and no. He can go screw himself, after screwing me over for the past two years; I don't want to talk to him or anybody else. Tell them to go screw themselves.

[Hash]

November 6, 1962 - 10:00pm - Poll Closings +3:00
Garrett campaign HQ
South Burlington, Vermont

Chris Garrett in his study, with only his wife and his 9-year old son, Ethan Lawrence. Steve Thomas, ecstatic and triumphant, walks in, with a great big smile.

Thomas: Chris, or rather Mr. Governor-elect... we've won!
Garrett: What, is this official?!
Thomas: Yeah, it's official, sir, you've won the election. The radio called it, the Secretary of State is confirming it. It's looking like 51-49, with a 2700 vote spread. It can't be contested.

Garrett jumps up and down, kissing his wife and his son, hugging Steve and then turning around to hug his wife again.

Lucie: Congratulations, honey, I'm so proud of you!
Garrett: I can't believe it, God, I've won. I can't believe this has finally happened, after all this. We did it, I love you guys. We took that piece of s-... that Keyser out of his hole! Dear Lord, this feels good.
Lucie: I knew you'd do it, Chris. I knew you could. You're a true fighter, and you showed everybody what you're made of. You showed them in 58 and 60 who Chris Garrett is, and now you showed them again!
Garrett: It just feels so good, so relieving, so... fun, to have defeated that man, Keyser. He was a tough guy, and he sure as hell played dirty...
Thomas: Chris, you should go and prepare your victory speech, and get ready to go out there. The crowd has gotten really big out there...
Lucie: Let's go, Chris, we'll work on it together.

A few minutes later, Garrett is putting the finishing touches on his victory speech when Steve Thomas rushes back in, excited as ever.

Thomas: Chris, Keyser's on the phone.
Garrett: Give it to me.

Garrett picks up the phone. There is an awkward silence of three or four seconds before Keyser speaks. (as always, italics for Keyser's famous private thoughts

Keyser: Uh... good evening, Congressman... I was calling to, uh... *sigh* congratulate... you on your victory... if you knew how much I hate your guts, son of a bitch
Garrett: Thank you, Governor. I appreciate your service to the state over the past two years, and even if we didn't always agree...
Keyser: Uh, yeah, sure. Sure, yeah. Thanks... Good job on your win... you lowlife liar
Garrett: Look, Governor, this campaign has been tough on both of us, we've both put so much energy, but I want to say that I appreciate your service to this state and country since 1960, Governor, I really do. I hope we can work together well during the coming months...
Keyser: Yeah, it was tough... Look, Congressman, great talking to you... I have to go now.
Garrett: Sure, thanks ag-

Keyser abruptly hangs up at the other end, leaving Garrett startled for a brief moment.

Garrett: What a jerk.
Lucie: What did he say?
Garrett: Nothing particular, he congratulated me as if he was congratulating a murderer and couldn't utter anything else of worth... and hung up on me so quickly...
Thomas: It's no secret the man hates you.
Garrett: I hate him too, but I have a transition to manage successfully, so he better not decide to act like an asshole.
Thomas: Chris, forget that has-been. Go out there, and proclaim victory.

[Hash]

November 6, 1962 - 10:30pm - Poll Closings +3:30
Outside the Garrett campaign HQ
South Burlington, Vermont

It was a fairly cool night, with a brisk wind slowly picking up. But the late hour and the cool November nights apparently did not demotivate anyone from showing up, as a large crowd of roughly 2,000 activists and onlookers assembled to hear the first public statement from Congressman, now Governor-elect Christopher A. Garrett. He walked up to the podium wearing a shirt and a sports jacket, surrounded by his wife, all smiles and radiating in her cleanly cut dress, and Steve Thomas, the loyal friend and political ally who stood in the background.

Reaching the podium, Garrett raised his hands high, as to form a 'V' with his two arms extended. The crowd responded with loud cheers and applause, with a chant of "GARR-ETT" slowly picking up among the crowd. As the cheers and commotion died down, Garrett began his speech.

My friends, thank you so much. Thank you so much for placing your trust in me, thank you for coming out tonight, thank you for believing in the great state of Vermont.

I just had Governor Keyser on the phone, and he conceded this election.

We won, tonight, my friends. We made history. We defeated a stale, archaic and complacent party system who confused smoke-filled party backrooms with government. Now, and forever, the bright light of change will shine across our Green Mountains and reflect on our beautiful lakes and rivers. This is an historic moment for the state of Vermont... for the people of Vermont.

The people of Vermont have clearly voted for change, for a new beginning. We can no longer afford to lock ourselves and our institutions behind the walls of tradition. Rather, we must confront, today, the forces which are affecting so many small towns and communities across our state. We must be honest with each other, and fix what is wrong with our state. Complacency, misplaced confidence in 'tradition' or any kind of naive idealism cannot, and will not, be our answers.

We are a proud, resilient, resourceful and fiercely independent people. I have always said that this state's greatest resources is its people, and I believe that together, we can achieve our great potential. Our greatest days are still ahead of us, to get there, we will need to work hard, and tackle issues which many in the past have been reluctant to take up, but we will do it, we must do it, because we are Vermonters, and Vermonters never fear new challenges.

We must underline the historical significance of this night in our state's history. After 109 years, change has finally knocked on our door. But ultimately, this isn't an issue of a Democrat defeating a Republican. This election has always been more than just that, it has been a choice between two visions of this state, and the vision of change and progress has triumphed. This victory tonight wouldn't have been possible without the support of thousands of independents and Republicans.

[...]

Tomorrow, our work begins. It will not be easy, in fact, it will be tough and we will need to take tough and unpopular decisions. I am not afraid of working with a Republican legislature. I am determined to govern for all Vermonters, regardless of their political affiliation, and I will seek to work across the aisles with Republicans. I am certain that not only will we get along well, we will be able to build great things together, for the common good of the state and its people.

I look forward to governing this great state, which I have been honoured to represent in Congress for the past four years. I will never forget the people who placed me there, and I will be eternally grateful to the people who have placed their trust in me.

We enter an exciting new age, one of rapid change and phenomenal progress. In this new era, we need new solutions to face the new challenges which will naturally arise. We will forge a new future, a new path for Vermont. A stronger economy, stronger schools and colleges, stronger and fairer democratic institutions, stronger towns and stronger governance. This is our challenge, and we accept it.

Thank you, thank you so very much.

God bless you, and may God bless Vermont!

Next up: Keyser concession speech

[SUSAN CRUSHBONE]

Next up: Keyser concession speech

[Hash]

November 6, 1962 - 10:45pm - Poll Closings +3:45
Capitol Plaza Hotel ballroom
Montpelier, Vermont

At the Capitol Plaza Hotel's ballroom in Montpelier, however, there is little excitement. There are, besides the cohort of journalists and reporters, only very few Republican activists and supporters out in the ballroom - at most 100 to 150. Governor Keyser walks into the ballroom surrounded by his campaign manager, Paul Fisher, visibly unhappy, and his wife Joan. Lt. Governor Ralph Foote is conspicuously absent from the Governor's concession speech. A small cheer from the supporters accompany the Governor's entrance, but there is little fanfare.

Keyser takes out a piece of paper from his suit's pocket, and begins reading his speech, like a Grade 5 student council candidate would read out his speech to a class, making little eye contact.

Fellow Vermonters--

The people have spoken. I just called Congressman Garrett to concede this election and thank him for his service to this state and country. I regret, but I respect, the verdict of the voters.

I had wished that the people of Vermont would renew their trust in my team, based on our strong record over the past two years, but that does not seem to be the case. I wish the Governor-elect the best of luck, and I wish only the best for the people of Vermont.

I want to assure the people of Vermont that I have spent the last two years tirelessly defending their interests and working for the good of this great state. As I leave office, I will be proud to know that I was able to accomplish many great things. We balanced the budget, without raising taxes, and we reformed and streamlined our state government to make it more efficient. We improved the business climate in this state, creating more jobs and boosting our industrial prospects by 25% in 1962 over 1961. We made significant investments and progresses in education, healthcare and infrastructure.

I stand by these achievements, and I am confident that our record over the past two years will contribute greatly to any success this state will achieve in the next few years. We have laid the groundwork for more jobs, lower taxes, more efficient government and a stronger economy. I only regret that some have sought to deform my record, to advance their narrow partisan interests.

I hope that the incoming Governor will continue on this same path towards prosperity and a brighter future. I regret that voters did not renew their trust in our record, but we live in a democracy, and the people of this state are the final judges. I accept their verdict, gracefully.

Let it be known that we Republicans will never stop fighting for our principles and for economic prosperity. I bow out of public life, but I am confident that my Republican colleagues will strongly oppose any plan to increase taxes, weaken our state's economic competitiveness and reckless plans of runaway spending.

Fellow Vermonters, thank you for the trust you placed in me two years ago. I am proud that we have been able to do so much for this great state in that short time period. I place my trust in the initiative and fierce independent spirit of Vermonters, for they will always be proud of their state and they will always place the greater good above narrow partisan self-interest.

Thank you, and good night.

[Atlas Has Shrugged]

Keyser lost by a narrow margin, so if he wants to, he can make a return in two years...but I think Garret will pacify that threat quickly. After all, he is the protagonist

[Hash]

November 6, 1962 - 10:45pm - Poll Closings +3:45
Garrett campaign HQ
South Burlington, Vermont

Chris Garrett listened to Keyser's concession speech on TV. As the Governor stepped away from the podium, folding up his piece of paper and walking off the stage, he closed the TV and turned to Steve Thomas, quietly sipping a cool glass of whiskey.

Garrett: Jesus Christ, Steve, did you see this guy? He was acting as if he was giving a damn campaign speech. Unbelievable.
Thomas: Yeah, well he’s a bitter asshole. Can’t get over that he lost.
Garrett: Ah, well, that’s his loss. I only hope he won’t be anal and all during the transition process, you know. It’s gonna be tough enough as it is.
Thomas: Of course, yeah. I mean, you know, we’re gonna be facing a legislature with a huge Republican majority still, and all other elected statewide officers are GOP. On the other hand, most of them are probably grateful that you rid them of Keyser.
Garrett: Steve, I have no doubt in my mind that their little vendetta against Keyser was part of their little parochial feuds, and while they may appreciate me for getting rid of Keyser, they make their goddamn living on being assholes to the executive branch and they’ll waste no time in screwing with me. Reminds of that other moron, what’s his name... Crist?
Thomas: You mean Luke Crispe, the lawyer from Brattleboro, without whose useful little ballot line we probably wouldn’t have won tonight?
Garrett: Yeah, that idiot. How long before he proceeds to take a sh**t on me like he took a sh**t on Keyser? He’s bitter that he’s a crappy politician, so he takes out his anger on those who actually made it. Why can’t he just go sell maple syrup? Anyhow - Steve - we gotta organize this transition team and get it running really quick.

Garrett and Thomas’ quiet conversation was interrupted by a phone ringing in the other room. Steve Thomas rushed to pick it up.

A few moments later.

Thomas: Chris, Chris, it’s the President!
Garrett: President of what? Maple syrup producers of Essex County?
Thomas: No, Kennedy, the President, Jack Kennedy.
Garrett: Oh sweet Jesus.

Garrett picks up the phone

Garrett: Hi? Mr. President?
Voice: Please hold for the President, Mr. Garrett.
Kennedy: Hi, Chris Garrett? I saw about your victory - quite phenomenal, really fantastic. You have my hearty congratulations.
Garrett: Mr. President, thank you, really, thanks for calling - and... you can call me Chris.
Kennedy: Sure, Chris. I was quite surprised you won, it wasn’t on my radar. It definitely must have been quite a fight, no, out there, in Vermont?
Garrett: You couldn’t guess, Mr. President. It was really tough, especially really dirty, and it was the fight of a lifetime for me. But we went out there and told them our message, the need for change and a new beginning, it’s been 109 years of GOP rule... it’s too much, it’s grown stale and all complacent. I want to shake things up, like you’re doing, Mr. President.
Kennedy: Ah, thanks, Chris! America needs a team of young reformers who are really determined to change things around, and I think it’s great that the winds of change have swept up Vermont.
Garrett: Yes, Mr. President. I have a huge task ahead of me, I’m going to be working with a 8 to 2 GOP majority in the legislature and Vermont is in dire need of big changes. We have to redistrict the whole state legislature.
Kennedy: Change doesn’t come easy, but again, congratulations on your win. I have to let you go, Chris, but I hope we can talk again.
Garrett: It was great speaking to you, Mr. President. I appreciate your call.

Garrett hangs up.

Garrett: Wow, Steve, I sure as hell didn’t expect Kennedy to call us up. We’re famous, Steve, we’re famous now. I’m kind of worried that no Republican has called to kiss my ass tonight.
Thomas: They're probably figuring out what the hell just happened. This is big, man. This is some really big stuff. We're making national news tomorrow with this right here. Defeating a GOP incumbent, the first Democratic Governor in 109 years and all.

[Hash]

November 6, 1962 - Election Day Post-Mortem

Results Wrap-up

GOVERNOR (D GAIN FROM R)


Created by homelycooking, the best electoral geographer on the internets

Rep. Christopher A. Garrett (D/I-Burlington) 51.12% (62,141 votes)
Rep. Christopher A. Garrett (D-Burlington) 47.92% (58,252 votes)
Rep. Christopher A. Garrett (VT Independent-Burlington) 3.2% (3,890 votes)
Governor Frank Ray Keyser, Jr. (R-Chelsea)* 48.88% (59,419 votes)

Garrett dominated in the traditional Democratic strongholds in the lowlands of the Champlain Valley (Chittenden, Franklin and Grand Isle Counties). He won 79.5% of the vote in the city of Burlington and well over 60% in Chittenden County as a whole, making significant gains in the proto-suburban communities surrounding the state's largest city (Colchester, Essex, Williston, over 60% in all three towns). In Franklin County, another traditional Democratic bastion, Garrett won over 60% of the vote overall, including 71% in St. Albans (city).

Compared to his 1960 performance, Garrett suffered sizable loses in Washington County, where Governor Keyser won 52.5% of the vote. Towns which Garrett had won in 1960, such as Waterbury and Middlesex, backed Keyser in 1962. In the county, Garrett won a bit over 55% in Montpelier and 66% in the blue-collar town of Barre.

Governor Keyser maintained the traditional Republican domination of rural Vermont, though Garrett did make some inroads, especially in Caledonia County, where Garrett managed to win 48% of the vote in a county which had given him a bit below 40% of the vote in 1960. Keyser won over 60% in Lamoille County, and won 69% in his native Orange County (and won 92% in Chelsea, his small hometown).

In southwestern Vermont, Garrett won historically high percentages for a Democrat not only in Rutland County but also in Bennington County, usually conceded to be a Republican stronghold. In Rutland County, acrimony towards Keyser's State Senate mini-redistricting and economic concerns surrounding the Rutland Railway likely boosted the Democratic vote. In Bennington and especially Windham Counties, Garrett attracted a lot of crossover support from Republicans, as evidenced by the high vote shares he received on Crispe's Vermont Independent Party line in those two counties.

LT. GOVERNOR

Lt. Governor Ralph A. Foote (R-Middlebury)* 55.8%
Frederick Delaney, Jr. (D) 44.2%

SECRETARY OF STATE

Secretary of State Howard E. Armstrong (R)* 56.9%
Madelyn S. Davidson (D) 43.1%

ATTORNEY GENERAL

Charles E. Gibson, Jr. (R)^ 54.2%
Robert W. Larrow (D) 45.8%

STATE TREASURER

State Treasurer George H. Amidon (R)* 57.1%
Peter J. Hincks (D) 42.9%

AUDITOR GENERAL

Auditor General David V. Anderson (R/D)* 100%

U.S. SENATE

Senator George D. Aiken (R-Putney)* 66.7%
W. Robert Johnson (D) 33.3%

U.S. REPRESENTATIVE (R GAIN FROM D)

Former Governor Robert T. Stafford (R-Rutland) 52.1%
State Rep. Philip H. Hoff (D-Burlington)^ 47.9%

VERMONT HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES

Republican Party 187 seats (-3)
Democratic Party 53 seats (+3)
Independents 2 seats (nc)

VERMONT SENATE

Republican Party 21 seats (-2)
Democratic Party 9 seats (+2)

There you have it. Next  up: the transition

Any comments, suggestions, questions, issues, quandaries, conundrums?

[homelycooking]

It seems like Vermont's politics has tacked very strongly toward emphasizing the rural/urban, agrarian/industrial cleavages, and is beginning to favor the latter in each. From the map, it's clear that Keyser dominated in small rural communities, while Garrett performed most strongly in Vermont's large towns and cities. Garrett, though, is a post-industrialist of sorts: he's a college professor, he's concerned with fair representation and other procedural matters, he's trying to make Vermont "an attractive place to live" and transform it from a rural backwater into a new locus of investment and innovation. Garrett's electoral coalitions have won the day, but the discontent of rural communities continues to fester.

Garrett said in the debate:

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But that's the nature of New England: town meetings and self-governance, local religious congregations, identification with one's town and one's neighbors. Garrett has the opportunity in his term as  Governor to bring about a political "post-industrial revolution" and move Vermont into the future: but does Vermont retain its identity without a robust pastoral and parochial culture?