I didn't hear the whole speech, can't comment to say if it was good or bad.
The question I could ask though, Did he convince the non Republican or Democrat man or woman of the street ? That's the audience that speech was made for, not for the people that where in stands last night.
He was not aiming at the standard Dem on the street. They aren't going to swing for him, and giving them policy specific will give them clearer reasons to vote for HRC (think about the way the Hillbots used Bernie's specifics against him during the primaries.)
He did aim at voters who don't often take political sides but prefer to be labeled as unaligned. That's the pitch to the left out and forgotten workers of the last decade, and to the security moms who aren't feeling as safe as they did 4 years ago.