Honest slogans for US political parties?

[DINGO Joe]

"We're not honest" for every political party.  Except for the Know-Nothing party which had a pretty honest name.

[perdedor]

Republicans: Go  yourself.

Democrats: Seriously, what alternative do you have?

Greens: Even Ralph Nader thought we were too ridiculous  to associate with.

Libertarians: End fiat currency! Because....ya know, like, ummmm....

[Rockefeller GOP]

GOP: Take care of your damn self; if you already do or are willing to, come on over ... Otherwise, get lost.

Dems: We are the only people who can save you!  We don't know who or what you fear, but we are the only ones who can help!

Libertarians: Freedom, always, no matter what ... We literally take nothing else into account.

[🦀🎂🦀🎂]

Lol let me try:

Democrats: we are a party that was founded by Andrew Jackson after the cessation of the Era of Good Feelings, although inspired from a movement dating back to notable anti-federalists like Jefferson. Inspired by the populist rage of the yeoman farmer against a WASP establishment characterised by the Whigs, we fought against tariffs, regressive taxes and a centralised bank. Today we are a broad coalition of minorities, young people and urban professionals and generally profess a socially liberal outlook with left-leaning policies.

Republicans: we were formed of various anti-slavery strands before the civil war. Forged around wartime president Abraham Lincoln, we then ushered in a business-friendly attitude characterised by support for tariffs, civil service reform and sound money. Today a large part of our coalition is based in the South and West, and we maintain pro-business attitudes as well as a powerful socially conservative contingent and strong support for national defence.

Did I do it right?

[Orthogonian Society Treasurer]

Lol let me try:

Democrats: we are a party that was founded by Andrew Jackson after the cessation of the Era of Good Feelings, although inspired from a movement dating back to notable anti-federalists like Jefferson. Inspired by the populist rage of the yeoman farmer against a WASP establishment characterised by the Whigs, we fought against tariffs, regressive taxes and a centralised bank. Today we are a broad coalition of minorities, young people and urban professionals and generally profess a socially liberal outlook with left-leaning policies.

Republicans: we were formed of various anti-slavery strands before the civil war. Forged around wartime president Abraham Lincoln, we then ushered in a business-friendly attitude characterised by support for tariffs, civil service reform and sound money. Today a large part of our coalition is based in the South and West, and we maintain pro-business attitudes as well as a powerful socially conservative contingent and strong support for national defence.

Did I do it right?

Catchy.

[Bojack Horseman]

Republicans: Damaging America's standing in the world in the name of improving America's standing in the world since 2001!

[Rockefeller GOP]

Lol let me try:

Democrats: we are a party that was founded by Andrew Jackson after the cessation of the Era of Good Feelings, although inspired from a movement dating back to notable anti-federalists like Jefferson. Inspired by the populist rage of the yeoman farmer against a WASP establishment characterised by the Whigs, we fought against tariffs, regressive taxes and a centralised bank. Today we are a broad coalition of minorities, young people and urban professionals and generally profess a socially liberal outlook with left-leaning policies.

Republicans: we were formed of various anti-slavery strands before the civil war. Forged around wartime president Abraham Lincoln, we then ushered in a business-friendly attitude characterised by support for tariffs, civil service reform and sound money. Today a large part of our coalition is based in the South and West, and we maintain pro-business attitudes as well as a powerful socially conservative contingent and strong support for national defence.

Did I do it right?

Excellent work.

[Rockefeller GOP]

Republicans: Damaging America's standing in the world in the name of improving America's standing in the world since 2001!

Less than excellent work.