I expect a bit of common sense from everybody, I don't expect minor parties like FPNP or AAEVP to run 308.
Aha.
Well, considering that the Rhino Party's best showing candidate-wise was around 120 candidates, I guess I'll go with that number.
So without further ado...
Leader name: His Eminence Cornelius the Second (a lamb from Beacon Hill Petting Zoo - though not a rhinocerous in stature, we nonetheless knew on sight that it was His Eminence reborn)
Leader home riding: Victoria
Number of candidates: 120
Candidate Groupings:
BC: 36 candidates (strongest province)
AB: 17 candidates
SK: 12 candidates
MB: 10 candidates
ON: 10 candidates
QC: 24 candidates
NB: 2 candidates
NS: 2 candidates
PE: 2 candidates
NL: 2 candidates
NT: 1 candidate
YK: 1 candidate
NU: 1 candidate
(I don't know how specific you want this.)
Main point of platforms:
- Our platform is made of sturdy cedar, and is roughly yea high.
- Our position is currently 48° 25′ N and 123° 21′ W. We feel this puts us more in line with Victoria as a whole than any other party. In addition, we feel that our candidates, having different positions among each of them, are just as much in line with their respective ridings.
- We strongly feel that one must have a very strong ground in mathematics in order to be a successful prime minister of Canada, because one can't very well minister primes unless one knows what they are.
- We feel that global warming is a serious issue, and will tirelessly fight to ban the presence of heaters within social studies classrooms.
- We strongly support renaming the Northwest Territories to the Kind Of In the Middle But Certainly More Northwest Than Before Nunavut Got Chopped Off Territories.
- We believe that small businesses are the future of Canada. Consequently, we will require that no store or office building be more than one storey in height and 200 square feet in area. We will recruit people from the bonsai industry to develop ways of making businesses smaller than you have ever seen them before.
- We strongly support the independence of Columbia from Britain, as we feel that the tyranny of the British Empire has held its people down for far too long.
- We feel that the notion of green energy is overrated. We will strongly push for a greater emphasis on violet energy, given that it has been scientifically proven to be higher.
- As always, above all, we promise that we will never keep a single promise.
More positions, of course, exist, but it would be tiresome to enumerate every longitude and latitude that is present within Canada, so I will let the ensuing campaign speak for itself.
