It’s 1980. President Carter in collusion with the Muslim Brotherhood laughs at a suggestion by Sgt John Everyman, Chief of Getting Things Done, to work on a deal to release the Iranian hostages. Sgt Everyman is disgusted and promises his cancer ridden daughter that he will seek vengeance for Democratic mishandling of the crisis. Luckily, Reagan is elected president in a landslide. Reagan and Everyman were buddies back in ‘Nam so Everyman knows he can trust him.
After saving Reagan’s busty wife Nancy from an attack by Muslims who had poisoned her tarot cards, the two set off to make things right in America battling against Tipp O’Neill, the deadly IRA backed terrorist Democratic chief of the Muslim Overlords Ninja Deadly Assassin League Extreme (M.O.N.D.A.L.E) and Reagan’s estranged son Ron Jr from building a device to block out the sun so it can never be ‘morning in America’ again. Everyman fights back against M.O.N.D.A.L.E’s goons but is heartbroken when O’Neill captures his daughter and gives her treatment for cancer in a public hospital where she will surely die after being injected by the deadly virus SocialAIDS.
Just in time, Reagan bursts in with his new sidekick Gorby, who warns O’Neill of the terrible effect SocialAIDS has had on Russia. Gorby and Reagan free Everyman’s daughter with the help of a local televangelist who was jailed for celebrating Christmas and flee to a private hospital. Everyman disables Ron Jr and then faces O’Neill down in the hospital canteen where after a series of blows, O’Neill drops down dead. Everyman finds on his possession a membership card proving that O’Neil was nothing more than a dirty Muslim Communist. Afterwards, Reagan announces he is stepping down. The whole nation is heartbroken wishing that he could be their President for ever and as a final act of gratitude, Sgt Everyman and his ‘Nam buddies blast an image of Reagan on the side of Mt Rushmore.
And in true schlocky movie fashion, Reagan will announce he's stepping down because "If I've learned anything from all of this, it's what the most important thing in life is. And that's family." Then he motions for Nancy to come join him up on stage with a large Golden Retriever and Michael Reagan, their only not-evil child. And everyone begins a slow-clap.
