Update XVI: Sidejackin' it in the Train Room.

[King]

Yeah, Oklahoma isn't France. You'll have to quit your job.

BUT, and I say this with trepidation because of your history, if you make it 2 solid years at this job with non-debt savings, it's very likely you could quit and get a new CAD job in 2 months easily with a solid work history.

[King]

If she weren't already married, I think this would be Bushie's true soulmate:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IJGIMd3_LfY

[King]

Though boring, a burger every meal shouldn't be a death sentence. The real problem for people like that guy and Bushie is: 80% lean beef, white bun, american cheese, hold the tomato, iceberg lettuce. Plus, that guy has four meals a day.

A person can be perfectly healthy eating nothing but burgers made from 95% lean beef, low fat cheese, whole wheat buns, red leaf lettuce, with tomatoes, and maybe some oven baked sweet potato fries.

Perfectly healthy.

[King]

Reruns of preseason football?

You should just play Madden or something.

[King]

Bushie's failure was not only Bushie but his symbiotic relationship with illegitimate scam businesses.

This is the first real company with real products and a real profit motive Bushie has worked for since OK Gas.

It should go better than anything he's done in the Update Saga because the company is trying utilize him for a skill. That being  said, the typical Bushie character flaws of fanciful Kenyan dreams, terrible health, and long naps still loom.

[King]

He does have a history of nothing but rosy reports right up until the moment he's escorted out of the building.

[King]

I'd be offended too if my boyfriend hadn't tried to kiss me yet after a year of dating and I found out from my dad that he asked for my hand in marriage.

[King]

"Single for life" is just one of Bushie's new diets. It'll pass soon.

[King]

Sitting a comfortable chair won't make your back feel better. You need to be upright walking or laying down.

[King]

Bushie's too short to be lineman. Even in high school, they're all about 6'0" minimum. He'd have to be a running back.

It's far too late for that, even in adult intermural.

[King]

Yeah, when I'm feeling bad I know I need to skip beans and rice and go for something light like a double bacon cheeseburger.

[King]

Walking puts him at risk of missing the crucial second half of Ohio States 67-10 win over Navy.

[King]

Holy crap Bushie. Seriously buy a video game or something if you're going to waste weekends this meaninglessly.

[King]

The sad part is how ordinary his takes on football are for someone who watches as much of it as he apparently does.

Well if he's like my Grandpa binge watching sports, he probably naps through 4/5ths of every game

[King]

Bushie, it's nice to have goals but you need to do something in order to reach them.

I am doing something to reach them and I am reaching them.  I am exercising portion control.

But with what you eat, you're clearly on a path to flatline well short of your goals. Whereas before you were eating like a 350 lb man and your weight was ballooning up and up, now you're eating like a 280-285 pound man, so your weight declined to the range, but trust me it is staying in that range until you change.

[King]

Weird Bushie.  Its almost like sitting in a chair for 48 hours straight watching football and eating junk food is bad for you or something.

[King]

"The only the junk food I had all day was everything I ate."

[King]

It's okay Bushie. You need encouragement. Progress, not perfection.  Keep making substitutions (skip the bacon, BBQ sauce instead of mayo, drink a glass of water before a meal, etc).

Bushie won't change by bullying him or making fun of him.

He loathes water and skipping bacon. It's really insensitive of you to suggest he do such a thing, snowbully283.6

[King]

If you were doing things even close to right or being at all interested in doing things close to right, we wouldn't be mocking you.

You eating hamburgers and ice cream all day, effectively sitting in a chair for 48 hours straight*, and you complain about a massive headache like it came out of nowhere or "because I'm getting old."  You gave yourself a headache.  There is no debate.

*Yes, I know you got up to go to the bathroom, walked to the car to drive to Sonic, and put your trash in the dumpster, but that's 500 steps of walking tops. 1000 if I'm being ultra generous. The average American walks 5000 steps per day and the average American is overweight as well and walks half as much as average people around the world. That is how far you are from normal activity.

[King]

There's no evidence you're in a process to change. There's no steps being taken.

A process would be from going to eating 0 vegetables to eating vegetables once a week. Or going from eating a burger every day to eating a burger every other day.

Hell, going for a walk once a fiscal quarter would be more signs of there being a process here.

[King]

I only have 1100 calories left today so I can't afford much.

1100 = can't afford much is because you only eat garbage.

An 8 oz sirloin with garlic mashed potatoes and steamed broccoli from Texas Roadhouse clocks in at 920 calories. But a las, even that is too healthy for you. You'd rather have "few ham sandwiches" for  1100 calories that leave you completely unsatisfied and still be hungry afterwards and have to go get some ice cream to fill your stomach.

[King]

You can get a different veggie. But remember corn is not a veggie. The point is, meals that are complete are more filling and easier to control in terms of calories than eating light carbs that don't fill you up. 2000 calories of steak, potatoes, and a green is far easier to eat than 2000 calories of bologna and cheese sandwiches

Have you ever had a caeser salad before, Bushie? You'd like it. Try eating a chicken caeser salad as a meal.


Also, go to KFC or Chick Fil A for fast food. Chicken is much better than beef. Here's a KFC suggestion

5pc max chicken strips
Unlimited green bean orders
1 biscuit

No more no less on the strips and biscuit. You can have as many green beans as you want.

Alternatively, if you must have a side like Mashed Potatoes, you can replace the 5 strips with 3 Grilled Chicken pieces, and then you can add a single mashed potatoes to the order.


As for your fast food burger addiction, I'm actually a big fan of burgers. The real calorie crux comes from the french fries and shakes. I want you to try one thing for me, Bushie, I want you to give up french fries and shakes for a month.

1 Braum's burger
1 side salad (they have it on the menu)
1 Diet Dr Pepper

I know, I know... salad is going too fast! But if you can't handle the freakin' salad yet, I'd honestly rather you order a bigger burger than eat any fries or shake.

My tip for making the salad more tolerable for you would be to not eat as a salad but to put it on your burger. Take a handful of the lettuce, carrots, cabbage, etc and just put it on top of the lettuce already on the burger. You probably won't notice it, in fact, you might like it.

That's my constructive advice for the day.

[King]

I consider the Frosty to be the shake at Wendy's.  If you want something sweet, I recommend trying Chobani Greek Yogurts. But at fast food, I'd really prefer your only sweet treat to be your diet soda.

When you get those cravings Bushie, just think long term. October 1st isn't a long time from now. You're not giving anything up cold turkey here. Your next shake is coming, just give it awhile.

[King]

I prefer if you got a Coke Zero instead of a regular Coke. Really disappointed in that, Bushie, but no fries is no fries. Thank you.

Don't knock him on the double whopper guys. Bigger burger is a better path to his goals than more empty carbs of french fries. That's the real point. Trying to get Bushie to stop eating empty carbs. And please for the love of god salad.

Regular soda is empty carbs, though.

[King]

Even less would be to drink your entire meal with water, and then reward yourself with a small Coke if you must have that real sugar, for dessert. That's what I'm trying to help with here Bushie. You need a reward system for your eating. Hence, no ice cream until Oct 1st. The reward of ice cream and fries has a specific rule.

After your fries/ice cream challenge ends, and you feel comfortable moving forward, I strongly recommend you start setting specific days of the week where you get to have certain foods--ie Friday is pizza day and pizza is only allowed on Friday. That way when you get your pizza craving on Tuesday, it's easier to not give in, knowing there's pizza on the horizon.

And the problem with your counting system Bushie is that it's not adequately filling your stomach. Foods that are not dense in calories will fill your stomach more. 100 calories of lettuce is way more lettuce than 100 calories of bread. That's where you are failing and most  of it comes from a complete lack of vegetables, which is practically calorie free food.

For another reward system, I recommend ordering that side salad with your fast food and eating it first, with the reward being, when you finish, you get to have a nice delicious burger. Yeah, I know you hate salad, but knowing that the reward at the end is makes it much easier.