The Atlas Gentleman's Social Club 1945

[King]

*wakes up from drunken whiskey slumber*

Emrgh, LaFolette and whatnot.

*back to sleep*

[King]

FOOLISH JOCK, I will not tolerate such talk of healthful tonics in these dark prohibition times from some redcoat!  The truth is the Democratic Party must push forth on the issue of Teapot Dome and organized crime.

Now, if you excuse me, my wife will be waiting at Penn Station for a train I feign riding, and so, I bid you good day!

[King]

I read a rather amusing titbit in the newspaper this morning.  Apparently, some Scotch fellow has invented a machine allowing an audience to view moving images simultaneously with the radio!  I had to check the newspaper's date to see if it was April the First.  The chap was calling it a "televisor" or somesuch.  What nonsense!

SUCH IMAGERY IS DEVILISH! DEVILISH I SAY! IT FLIES IN THE FACE OF GOD!

[King]

Somebody call me when it's the sixties.  I have many a lysergic acid-fabricated conspiracy to share with the esteemed members of our club.

[King]

As I predicted, Comrade Lief stands firm behind Stalin's message.  You can see the puppet strings connected from the Kremlin to his shoulders.  Should the peace between Germany and the USSR end, mark my words, Lief will be demanding immediate American intervention to save his workers' paradise.  You Reds are the most disgustingly predictable people in politics.  Whatever Stalin wants, you want.

What is this "cellular phone" that you used to transmit this message?!?!