Update XVII: I Ate The Strawberry (The REAL, AUTHENTIC Update)

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

Why are we getting so caught up with the actual job performance?  Is it possible that Bushie has a number of odd ideosyncracies and habits that perhaps make him a pain in the ass to work with?  Perhaps others became annoyed with his insistance on listening to the radio at a reasonable volume from 9 to 11...

I jest, but Bushie has a ton of -isms.  Jeff, is it possible you did anything to annoy your boss? 

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

bushie insists on listening to the radio between 9-11 at work?

Someone please help Walter. 

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

bushie insists on listening to the radio between 9-11 at work?

Someone please help Walter. 

turns out you were right!  he does listen to the radio at work.

A humorous turn of events, yes... but you still need to go to your local West Coast Video and slam this bad boy into the ol' VCR.

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

I don't see the radio thing as weird. If I'm knuckling down to something, I shut my office door and put on a podcast or something on YouTube - always helps me. There is something about the American workplace that just seems awful.

On topic ... Let's make these points clear

a) if you were as good a drafter as you believed - you would not be getting fired
b) you're an awful judge of your own abilities
c) just because you want a career in something, doesn't meant you're either going to have one, or have one on your timetable
d) it's clear your CADD skill-set isn't READY yet - stop, get a low-demand job - practice CADD every night (yes, EVERY NIGHT) then in 3-6 months time. Start looking again.

You're never going to have a career if you keep jumping from CADD job to job without building your skill set to a workable level. The other issue, considering your inability to judge your own abilities, did you over-sell yourself in the interview.

It could be that the negative perf review was because you weren't doing things he's assumed you should be able to, even with basic CADD training.

There are many, many things that are awful about the American workplace. 

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

Just get on disability and be happy, Bushie. You don't want CADD. You'll be happier napping, watching tv, listening to Christmas music, and watching the weather all day. If you can't make it at a small mom and pop CADD drafting firm, you aren't going to make it anywhere.

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

If Bushie does the part-time Wal-Mart thing, he still has 20 hours a week (+ his free time) to look for a CAD(D) job and, most importantly, study his CAD(D).

Or he could do the fulltime manager thing and finally settle down into a career for himself. Maybe he'll run his own Wal-Mart one day.

Bushie PLEASE listen to Bacon King.

Bushie feels it to be below him to work at the Wal-Mart, but not below him to buy literally everything there.

That brings me to another point; did you know that Southerners do their grocery shopping at Wal-Mart?  I always love to hear about the superficial differences between regions, so the Navy gave me ample opportunity to do some research about life in Alabama, Mississippi, etc.  I told them about Wegman's, Shop-Rite, etc. and all the great options we have for grocery shopping.  Asking them about where they get their food, they told me Wal-Mart!  I said, no, not snacks... I mean like, produce, meats, milk, eggs, cold cuts, pasta, all the big ticket items. Wal-Mart, Wal-Mart, Wal-Mart.  It's shocking. I guess having literally EVERYTHING in one place is convenient... but all of it at Wal-Mart quality?  And is there even a point to have a downtown anymore?  Every town seems to be centered aroud that ugly warehouse.  Pity...

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

Yes, even back in my hometown of Austin, where Whole Foods was literally invented, it seems that more and more Wal-Marts are springing up, one now just a five minute drive from my house (just a ten minute drive from downtown!), wiping out entire shopping centers, and people seem to do the majority of their shopping there. My girlfriend lives in Chester County, Pennsylvania and they do their groceries at the Wal-Mart five minutes away. More and more, Wal-Marts seem to be the social and economic heart of American communities (unless you're in very densely populated urban centers of course). It wouldn't surprise me if politicians started holding campaign rallies in Wal-Mart parking lots.

Chester has fallen?!  We have a few Wal-Marts up and down Rt. 130 and towards the city in Camden and Burlington counties over on the NJ side, but it's hardly the "town center" and are more there for toys and cheap sports equipment.  I suppose it's not long until NJ is completely infested by that disease, too.  Ugh... might have to high-tail it to Hoboken sooner than I thought.  Progressive urban centers in the NJ/NY area are obviously intelligent enough to understand the destruction and despair that would befall them by dropping ol' Sam's big box store into the neighborhood. 

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

Yup, there's a giant Wal-Mart-dominated shopping center on one side of the road, and then you drive a minute or so further and there's some sort of Amish farmer's market/restaurant on the other side.

Are any of the Chesterites good enough people to opt for the Amish place? 

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

It wouldn't surprise me if politicians started holding campaign rallies in Wal-Mart parking lots.

This would be great because it would inevitably cause a hilarious calamity

Walmart vigorously prohibits anything from ever happening in their parking lots except for A) parking and B) things that are specifically and explicitly approved by the store manager in advance. This strict rule lets them shoo away union stuff at the first hint of trouble and keeps potential picket lines on the far side of those giantass parking lots, except with enough vagueness that they can't claim it's specifically to target unions.

There's a 24/7 "labor relations" hotline that a store is supposed to call when anything union related happens (my computer training told me it should be called like literally any time I ever heard someone say the word "union" on the premises).

If a campaign event was happening but the shift manager forgot it had been scheduled, then saw the campaign placards from a distance and mistook them for picket signs, then it's entirely plausible State Senator whats-his-face would find his campaign event being forcibly broken up by modern-day Pinkertons

I've heard of this, and it's the number one reason Wal-Mart must be forcibly destroyed.  Until then, however, I don't mind if Bushie manages one.

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

Hearing this stuff makes me happy to live in a Wal-Mart blackhole. I used to make a big deal out of boycotting Wal-Mart, but that's kind of pointless now, since it's not convenient for me to shop there anyway: http://www.walmart.com/store/finder?location=55404

Note not just the lack in Minneapolis, but that area to the west of it too. That area is full of people who 1-don't shop at Wal-Mart and 2-probably consider shopping at Wal-Mart beneath them, even if Republicans. This is especially noticable in the immediate SW suburbs, most notably Edina and St. Louis Park, which have a very rich feel to them, but not in trashy giant McMansion way. Think tons of luxury apartments and expensive jewelry and fashion stores. Rich Democrat land basically, probably the people most likely to find Wal-Mart repulsive.

Rich Democrats, despite being rich, tend to have many very good qualities. 

And congrats on living no where near a Wal-Mart.  I often am forced to drive by them and notice the packed parking lots out of my peripheral.  It's like watching a puppy burn to death.  Very unpleasant. 

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

Jeff, Bacon King is really doling out some great advice and options, here. Don't let your pride get in the way of a really good suggestion and a willing referrer.

He and I are in correspondence over PM over application and such.  He is going to give me the link after he wakes up in the morning and I'll get started on the application immediately after I get home from my other job searching tomorrow midday.

Ask BK how Wal-Martians would feel about your fancy-pants college degree. 

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

Yup, there's a giant Wal-Mart-dominated shopping center on one side of the road, and then you drive a minute or so further and there's some sort of Amish farmer's market/restaurant on the other side.

Are any of the Chesterites good enough people to opt for the Amish place? 

We certainly did! We bought a delicious pumpkin cake, as well as an assortment of knick knacks from the thrift shop portion of the farmers market.

Well done.  No doubt the pumpkin cake was fresh and wholesome and tasty and far superior to whatever orange-dyed frankenfood Wal-Mart trots out for the fall season.  

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

Yup, there's a giant Wal-Mart-dominated shopping center on one side of the road, and then you drive a minute or so further and there's some sort of Amish farmer's market/restaurant on the other side.

Are any of the Chesterites good enough people to opt for the Amish place?  

We certainly did! We bought a delicious pumpkin cake, as well as an assortment of knick knacks from the thrift shop portion of the farmers market.

Well done.  No doubt the pumpkin cake was fresh and wholesome and tasty and far superior to whatever orange-dyed frankenfood Wal-Mart trots out for the fall season.  

Look, there are some people who are willing to prioritize cost over quality, at least to the extent that Wal-Mart food costs less/tastes worse than food from other stores (which is different for every area). No need for you to be such a snob about other people's food choices (the Update thread is not a great place to say this, but whatever).

Anyway, it's interesting that Update could significantly change the course of Bushie's life. Has this happened before?

First I'm a misogynist for complimenting Kate Upton's breasts and now I'm a snob because I recognize that Amish people make better pumpkin cake then Wal-Mart.  

Atlas... remove the sand.

And Update has significantly changed the course of Bushie's life many times.  Besides keeping him out of jail, it's also led to literally 10 or so days of walking more than without Update, saved Jeffison for a solid 7-8 months after "the joke", and probably got Bushie to switch to Diet Dr. Pepper.  

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

There are few Wal-Marts in Minnesota largely because that market is dominated by Target stores here.

Excellent.  Minnesota is very good.  And here's an article for those people who say they are the same thing. 

http://steve-olson.com/10-reasons-target-is-better-than-wal-mart/

Target is far less destructive than Wal-Mart.  If Wal-Mart is like Skynet then Target is like a printer that gets jammed a bit. 

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

this wal mart chat is pretty boring.  though i was delighted to learn that one is supposed to report even the mention of the word 'union.'  it really is a great company.

anyway, bushie,  *DO NOT QUIT* tomorrow.  go in and face the music.  if you get fired (which is 99% likely). so be it.  but dont quit.

Walter, you don't have to go blue... But at least give green some thought.

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

When I say it will be ending soon, I don't mean anytime in the immediate future.  I believe we are somewhere between 7 and 10 years away.  That's my best guess.  However, the Bible clearly says no one knows the day nor the hour that the Son of man will return, but based on current events especially in Europe and the Middle East, I think we can get an idea.

Since we don't officially know when it's going to end, it is still vital to live life as normal and go out and be a witness to the unbelievers.  Note, in Christianity that is gently, lovingly talking and praying with them.  Parts of Islam is much more forceful and violent to unbelievers.

7 to 10 years? That's extremely soon, not just on a geological time frame, but even in the life of a person . Is that why you live the way you do? I'd probably be up to a lot of crazy shenanigans too if I were convinced there was no need to plan for anything past 2024.  You'd still be the better Updater by far though. I'm more than happy to give you that.

Bushie thinks eternity spans 7000 years.  Only 2014 of them meaningful.  7-10 is a decent chuck of that. 

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

I think the more important question is...

How do you have SEVERAL family dinners over the course of one weekend?  

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

I remember back in college and for a bit of time after I valeted cars at a fancy restaurant to make ends meet.  Every single Sunday, and sometimes during the week, this lady who drove a beige Corolla would come in, must've been about 60-65 yrs old, for lunch right around 3pm and park herself in a VIP spot and throw me $3 (not even close to VIP money at this place but she was nice and a friend of ownership so it's all good).  Always with her was this ancient old wench who must be pushing 100 (presumably her mother), another woman about her age (presumably her sister), and this awkward middle-aged pedostached guy who was a good 20 years younger, never wore anything besides sweatpants with a graphic t-shirt, and would just mumble to himself.  I will now and forever think of them as The Jersey Bushies.  

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

Just got fired. Resumes usual pattern of TV-watching and having family dinners with distant relatives who randomly show up all the time. Way to make those changes to be successful. Give yourself a pat on the back.

I mean seriously... why do we all keep on bothering with this?

This is the story of America, Sim, told by the one Forumite who personifies the modern American experience like no one else here.

Update is the most important and relevant thing we have here at Atlas.

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

The real tragedy here is that Bushie wasn't born in similar circumstances in Saudi Arabia, because he could have easily landed a nice gig in the Saudi government with awesome conditions and insanely good job security - where you're paid to do nothing all day, surf the internet, play games online, go to prayer during working hours, take a nap at noon, leave the office at 2-3pm to head home and ingest piles of sh**t (given that Saudis mostly eat the same sh**t as Bushie does, and KSA has the same chains as in Oklahoma...) and do whatever mundane daily activities for the rest of the day. Besides, KSA has free healthcare, no taxes, cheap gas and apparently even subsidized (if not free) cars and housing for public servants. There's certainly little incentive to actually work if your job is a push-paper redundancy in the government there, so there'd obviously be no risk of getting canned within a month.

Oklahoma is like the Christian Saudi Arabia, minus all those benefits...

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

I'm going to be pretty upset if Bushie doesn't have lunch with J-Mann.

Yea... Job misadventures aside, if I get the impression Bushie stands J-Mann up because Mom and Dad say no I might have to have a King-esque meltdown.

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

I wish Bushie would meet with J-Mann, but I know he won't. He'll be too busy playing on his tablet while his family sits around the TV.

I'll definitely take laziness over;

"Mom, Dad, I'm going to leave a bit early to meet with a friend for dinner in Kansas City"

"Oh you most certainly will be doing no such thing, young man!  Sit down and talk to your grandmother about bridge club!"

"Yes, sir." 

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

I wish Bushie would meet with J-Mann, but I know he won't. He'll be too busy playing on his tablet while his family sits around the TV.

I'll definitely take laziness over;

"Mom, Dad, I'm going to leave a bit early to meet with a friend for dinner in Kansas City"

"Oh you most certainly will be doing no such thing, young man!  Sit down and talk to your grandmother about bridge club!"

"Yes, sir." 

Guys you have to remember that Bushie isn't even allowed to use the stove at home to boil himself pasta. This exchange wouldn't surprise me.

Look at my post above.  I'm preparing to go nuclear because I can see it happening. 

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

I wish Bushie would meet with J-Mann, but I know he won't. He'll be too busy playing on his tablet while his family sits around the TV.

I'll definitely take laziness over;

"Mom, Dad, I'm going to leave a bit early to meet with a friend for dinner in Kansas City"

"Oh you most certainly will be doing no such thing, young man!  Sit down and talk to your grandmother about bridge club!"

"Yes, sir."  

"Jeff, what's this I hear about you talking to strangers on the Interweb? Your father and I are very upset with you. Go sit in the train room and we'll come in to discuss this in a little while!"

"Guys, Dad is hot under the collar about Update.  We are meeting at Braum's at 1700 to discuss our game plan going forward."

[Starbucks Union Thug HokeyPuck]

The Facebooks just lit up with news of an AutoCADD interview this Friday.  I'm surprised Our Hero hasn't dropped the happy bomb here yet.