angus
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Posts: 17,424
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« on: March 26, 2012, 04:08:38 PM » |
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–Strippers: very well. The man with the ten thousand dollar bet can probably spare lots of singles.
–9/11 truthers: not well. They know who let the dogs out.
–sport fans: exceedingly well, especially among auto racing fans, who will appreciate Romney's many cars.
–Teabaggers: not so well. Mormons can't have caffeine.
–wears hoodies: anyone who wears hoodies probably doesn't like flip-flops. not so well.
–Occupy Wall Street protesters: not so well, since he'll have them arrested for blocking his buildings.
–smokes weed: not very well. The good news for Romney is that no one else win win their votes either, since they will very likely forget to vote on election day.
–Reagan Democrats: Worst of all, since they're mostly rustbelt workers who lost their jobs when etch-a-sketch moved its manufacture to China.
–Hipster Christians: probably not well. Mormonism isn't one of the Hip flavors of Christianity.
–Buddhists: His best group of all. All things in moderation, right.
–Jews: Romney likes cheese on his grits, and what Jew doesn't like dairy?
–Scientologists: very well. L. Ron Hubbard and W. Mitt Romney both go by their middle names.
–owns PS3 and XBOX360: very well. They'll see Santorum holding an Etch-a-Sketch and talking about Romney and they'll think, "hey, that dude Romney likes video games too."
–Bob Marley fans: Rasta men will appreciate Romney's abstention from alcohol, so this could be good.
–Emo fans: Not very well. Romney smiles too much.
–metalheads: Possibly very well since their ears are so damaged by the loud music that they can't hear Romney's constant contradictions.
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