Summary of your religious beliefs

[HillGoose]

they can best be summarized as "depression" or maybe "cynicism" or "negativity" tbh

i listened to this creepypasta a few months ago about how basically every living thing existed in eternal torment after death because life itself was an abomination to the void, and ever since then that's all i can imagine being true

except it's probably not the void, it's probably god gleefully damning every being that ever lived, because if god does exist i can't imagine any possibility other than that god is evil and sadistic. he's basically Saddam Hussein on a cosmic scale. as Christopher Hitchens said, "an unalterable, unchallengeable, tyrannical authority who can convict you of thoughtcrime while you are asleep"

and if heaven does somehow exist, there is definitely a predestined "elect", there isn't very many of them, and i imagine most of them aren't good people either. just god's predestined favorites.

that's all I can imagine the universe boils down to. i fully expect that when i close my eyes for the last time i will awake to torment without end, and it makes life seem meaningless because what does the next 60 years of life (if i'm even that lucky, given my stress levels it's probably more like 20-35 years, max) even mean when an eternity of hell awaits me no matter what i do.