Update XXI: "Scientific Facts Are Not Hard And Fast Rules."

[Joe Republic]

Is there anything finer than having a flashback memory of great old Bushie post and then finding it and reading it and having a good ol' chuckle again?

Like his plan to take his new girlfriend on a date to go see the G-rated kids film Fly Me to the Moon. Sexy.

My girlfriend and I are going on a double date this Friday to see Fly Me to the Moon.  Its just a simple animated G-rated movie (something my generation won't even touch), only 95 minutes long, but we're looking forward to it.  Its in Dolby-Digital 3D.

jesus

http://youtu.be/wMf8PrNJajM

no seriously wtf

[Joe Republic]

THEN WHY DO YOU NEVER F[INKS]ING EAT ANY OF THEM

[Joe Republic]

She wants me to hop on board with her handling the social media platform as kind of a second job from my regular job.

Will you even have enough spare time left over from your demanding first job?

[Joe Republic]

In other news, I think I found someone who is more energetic about Christmas than I am.  The City of Tulsa.  We are still 10 months from Christmas 2015, but the City is already planning the 2015 Christmas Parade going so far as to setting a date - December 12.  I'm early, but I'm still at least 3-4 months from starting Christmas, but these guys take the cake...

Uh no, for a large city that kind of municipal event planning so far ahead is necessary.

[Joe Republic]

How did Bushie accidentally have sex?

He tripped and fell while she happened to be lying on the floor using a thighmaster.

RIP

[Joe Republic]

Yes yes, we already know you begin celebrating Christmas in the Spring.  What we only just discovered last December however is you stop celebrating it a few days before Christmas Eve.

[Joe Republic]

I've never been to a [Redacted]; we don't have any around here.  How similar is it to Whole Foods?


Edit: never mind, I lied.  There's two [Redacted] locations right here in town.  I'll have to check it out!

[Joe Republic]

I hope I'm not the only one thinking that, given the [redacted] opening date, this is a very elaborate April Fools Joke, and Bushie will find himself once again unemployed later that morning?

Mom and Dad approve so thats more icing on the cake.

No, see, you're working the meat counter, not the bakery.

[Joe Republic]

I hate to admit that I'm optimistic about this, but damn it, I am.  It's a stable, fair paid job that requires light cardio activity all day, and surrounded by healthy groceries.  If this doesn't last, or see significant lifestyle improvements, then there is literally zero hope.

[Joe Republic]

No, you see, there were 2-3" inches of snow outside one day.  It's impossible to walk anywhere in those conditions, so you have to take the week off from it.  This is NOT HIS FAULT.

[Joe Republic]

Everything you just said is correct, and I know how hard it could be. Just remember what someone said pages back. It takes quite awhile to break an addiction (20 days?). I gave up Coke for Lent two years ago when I drank it all the time. Now I can effectively manage it to about two a week.

I know you can do it too if you can withhold cheat days on that (Sunday exceptions were not used by me). Breaking a habit is hard, but it requires focus. It's probably much harder for you with the lack of an obvious alternative, but have you tried anything else? Even stuff like iced tea is marginally better. What about Coke Zero? Switch that in for water now and then. (I presume that's not too bad. Haven't heard much about it.)

The first step in breaking an addiction is admitting there is an addiction.

How many further steps can you take before resting for a nap?

[Joe Republic]

Bushie should have been born a woman. He takes after his mama so much. He would've made a perfect fat bride to a young innocent Papa in the making.

Or better yet, another Tyffannyé.