Did you ever believe that cow tipping was a real thing?

[I spent the winter writing songs about getting better]

Honestly I was skeptical even as a kid...because I had actually seen cows on a farm before sleeping on the ground, and thought about how difficult it would be to tip something that weighs as much as a cow. And so when I found out it doesn't happen, I wasn't really surprised.

(For pretty much the same reasons my childhood self realized, cows don't sleep standing up, and they weigh far too much for a single person to tip over.)

[I spent the winter writing songs about getting better]

 Maybe cows can sleep standing up (I don't even know the answer to that today), but they also have no problem laying down and getting back up.

They don't. People are thinking of horses who can because they can lock their legs before sleeping. Cows can't.

[I spent the winter writing songs about getting better]

How much are you supposed to tip anyway?

15-20% of the milk's market value, duh

(seriously I have no idea what "cow tipping" is supposed to mean here but I choose to read it like that)

I'm guessing this is something that isn't talked about much outside the US, but it's an urban legend (well actually I guess a "rural legend") that people around farms amuse them by sneaking up on sleeping cows and tipping them over. Except it's impossible for the reasons mentioned above.