The t_host1 Institute of Comedy

[Donerail]

In the race for Arizona's two Corporation Commission Seats, we project that Brenda Burns will be re-elected with token opposition, and that Gary Pierce's seat (Pierce is term limited, and is running for Mine Inspector) will be picked up by Democrat (and former Corporation Commissioner) Paul Newman who defeats Jerome Mayor Nikki Check.

Arizona Corporation Commission Seat "GP" 69% Reporting

Paul Newman (D) 53%
Nikki Check (R) 46%

In the race for Arizona Mine Inspector, we project incumbent Joe Hart will win unopposed.

[Simfan34]

Though I will disagree on what Putin will pursue next after he swallows Donbass; he won't go west immediately. You all may be underestimating the importance of the resource-rich and, in all cases except Uzbekistan and Turkmenistan, fairly pro-Moscow governments which will probably end up as part of Putin's "Union State" thing in Central Asia. If he's to annex Kazakhstan/Kyrgyzstan/Tajikistan he'll have to act before they fall entirely in China's sphere.

There is a complication there. A) Russia only borders on Kazakhstan. B) If the "polite people" show up in Kazakhstan they will be arrested and/or killed within hours. Kazakhstan is a proper dictatorship, if somewhat benevolent. And it has been given warning. Apparently, security services in northern Kazakhstan are super-vigilant already, taking care of shadowing visitors from Russia.

[Donerail]

Mike Viqueira killed in poison gas attack!



Mike Viqueira was killed today in a botched terrorist attack on the White House. The plotters, Idris bin Hamdan al-Fahmy of Nazzan village in Upper Nile province of sudan, and Elkhateb bin Mawnis of Alzanaj oasis in Hail Province of Saudi Arabia, used Phosphonofluoridic acid gas from a rented Shell tanker, releasing the gas all around the vicinity of the American Presidential Palace. Louis E. Imhof III, a candidate for County Clerk in Passaic County, New Jersey, was also killed in the attack, as were seven other non-notables.

[Atlas Has Shrugged]

It gets better....

Mike Viqueira killed in poison gas attack!



Mike Viqueira was killed today in a botched terrorist attack on the White House. The plotters, Idris bin Hamdan al-Fahmy of Nazzan village in Upper Nile province of sudan, and Elkhateb bin Mawnis of Alzanaj oasis in Hail Province of Saudi Arabia, used Phosphonofluoridic acid gas from a rented Shell tanker, releasing the gas all around the vicinity of the American Presidential Palace. Louis E. Imhof III, a candidate for County Clerk in Passaic County, New Jersey, was also killed in the attack, as were seven other non-notables.

Please delete...

No.

[Hifly]

^ That was inconceivably hilarious. I recommend trolling his timeline further.

[Snowstalker Mk. II]

A World Cup this year? The last was recent, wasn't it?

[Snowstalker Mk. II]

Windhoek, Namibia

Namibian Elections set new turnout record

Welcome, I'm Riz Lateef, and we have up-to the minute results on the major International Election tonight, the Presidency of Namibia, where the incumbent Hifkepuyne Pohmaba is currently term-limited. With many serious candidates the race was long and winding, but Namibia has benefited it seems, as turnout of eligible voters has hit a new high, with a preliminary tally of 82% of those eligible to vote turning out to do so. At this time we project that the Foreign Affairs Minister of Namibia, Netumbo Nandi-Ndaiwatah will squeak out a narrow victory in the Presidential race.

Namibia President 100% Reporting


Foreign Minister Netumbo Nandi-Ndaiwatah 23%


Prime Minister Hage Geingob 21%


Windhoek Mayor Agnes Kafula 16%


Justice Minister Utoni Nujoma 12%


Walvis Bay Mayor Uilika Nambahu 11%


Retired Lieutenant General, and former ambassador to Zambia, Martin Shalli 10%


Former Cabinet Member Ben Amathila 5%

[IceSpear]

The so-called "far right" is, fundamentally, no worse than the peons of neoliberal hegemony that constitute the false political choice citizens are normally faced with. I welcome any attempt to dismantle the abhorrent system of velociraptor capitalism that the workers have been devoured by for far too long. Will the Eurocrats (so-called, of course) wake up? Perhaps.

[Simfan34]

The so-called "far right" is, fundamentally, no worse than the peons of neoliberal hegemony that constitute the false political choice citizens are normally faced with. I welcome any attempt to dismantle the abhorrent system of velociraptor capitalism that the workers have been devoured by for far too long. Will the Eurocrats (so-called, of course) wake up? Perhaps.

How is this funny?

[Sol]

Both posts are quite comedic, Scott's moreso.

A degenerate prostitute, like all Italians, of course. Remember, Berlusconi was no different to the false idol Renzi, or the tragically flawed (if well-intentioned) Mussolini himself - Rome has long been the Babylon of our age, so it is unsurprising that the Cuomo family has singlehandedly waged a shameful crusade against the white working classes of New York state for generations. Herr Cuomo's son merely continued this vicious task upon his succession as Il Duce.

[Mad Deadly Worldwide Communist Gangster Computer God]

Both posts are quite comedic, Scott's moreso.

A degenerate prostitute, like all Italians, of course. Remember, Berlusconi was no different to the false idol Renzi, or the tragically flawed (if well-intentioned) Mussolini himself - Rome has long been the Babylon of our age, so it is unsurprising that the Cuomo family has singlehandedly waged a shameful crusade against the white working classes of New York state for generations. Herr Cuomo's son merely continued this vicious task upon his succession as Il Duce.

You mean my reply in the original thread?

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

CNN BREAKING NEWS



Good evening and thank you for joining us this evening, I'm Wolf Blitzer reporting live from the Situation Room.  Top story tonight; CNN is projecting that voters on the online forum US Election Atlas have overwhelmingly voted their disapproval of forum member NewYorkExpress, in a crushing vote of no confidence.

Opinion of NewYorkExpress:
Freedom Fighter    28.8%
Horrible Person      71.2%

[courts]

A degenerate prostitute, like all Italians, of course. Remember, Berlusconi was no different to the false idol Renzi, or the tragically flawed (if well-intentioned) Mussolini himself - Rome has long been the Babylon of our age, so it is unsurprising that the Cuomo family has singlehandedly waged a shameful crusade against the white working classes of New York state for generations. Herr Cuomo's son merely continued this vicious task upon his succession as Il Duce.

[Mr. Morden]

From the thread titled "Do you support eugenics?"

Generally no, but I have second thoughts every day I have to moderate posts....

[Antonio the Sixth]

I chuckled.

How can you be God and not be able to beat Italy?

[windjammer]

I have Krazen on ignore, what were the poll results?

[True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자)]

Look at the rate of sexual assault in the US armed forces and then tell me more about how our recruits aren't scrapping the bottom of the barrel.

perhaps we should recruit more on college campuses?

[windjammer]

Masked Vigilante on the Loose in Kentucky!

Louisville KY, Eyewitnesses in multiple neighborhoods report seeing a masked man attacking criminals on the street. The man is described as being Caucasian, in his 30's, wearing a red hood and cape, and rambling about everything being part of a vast rightwing conspiracy. Police say this vigilante, going by the name "Bandit, The Worker" is suspected of arson after several private schools in Louisville burned down last month, in addition to charges of obstruction of justice. There is also charges of theft after reports of the Bandit breaking into homes in the wealthier parts of town and stealing all the valuable items in the homes, only to drop them off outside of donation centers.

If you have any information on the Bandit, please contact the Louisville police.

LOL

[Anti Democrat Democrat Club]

01.05.28

 In the context of the book “The Road to Serfdom “, “Presence of mad | Presents of mad”,” is” the best titled sequel of the Obama era. This new sequel of the Serfdom book having the ending would be a great read for all the progressed democrats trying to make sense of the transformation that they voted for.
 In the interest of library EPA looking time; in what book section would the “Presence of mad | Presents of mad” rest? Political Science, Environmental, Health - Foods & Nutrition, Religion or Humor.   

[Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook]

Write-In: Tupac

[Kushahontas]

not one bit.

i find myself rooting against the usa.  if america does well, that means we will have to hear more about soccer.  no one wants that when there is baseball to talk about!

[TNF]

Twenty years of 401k contributions: $12000
Money that Boomer actually gets from scumbag company upon retirement because "much economy!": $12
Overpriced Mac POS 2100 or whatever the hell it's called so Oldie can bitch on Facebook about how evil liberals have destroyed the economy: $2100
A New York dinner: $6000, a plate.
Sheltered "liberal" WASPs on the Atlas forum who call a party supposedly only composing of white racist scots-Irish redneck sisterf@@@ing dumbasses from Appalachia who have somehow continued to beat them "dumb": ING PRICELESS

Some people live on the Internet, for the rest of us there is REALITY!  If you need help finding it, go see your local unemployment office today!

[True Federalist (진정한 연방 주의자)]

Click for context:

Yes, I am...

[Mr. Morden]

Click for context:

Yes, I am...

Doubly funny since the thread topic is "Are you missing Update right now?"

[Joe Republic]

(I have a fetish for doing it on July 4).