Molson's Canadian vs. Foster's Australian
Platypus:
Which do you prefer?
Molson "I am Canadian" ad:
http://home7.swipnet.se/~w-72891/CanadianClub/CCsales/ad.html
Hey.
I'm not a lumberjack,
or a fur trader...
and I don't live in an igloo
or eat blubber, or own a dogsled...
and I don't know Jimmy, Sally or Suzy from Canada,
although I'm certain they're really, really nice.
I have a Prime Minister,
not a President.
I speak English and French,
NOT American.
and I pronouce it ABOUT,
NOT A BOOT.
I can proudly sew my country's flag on my backpack.
I believe in peace keeping, NOT policing.
DIVERSITY, NOT assimilation,
AND THAT THE BEAVER IS A TRULY PROUD AND NOBLE ANIMAL.
A TOQUE IS A HAT,
A CHESTERFIELD IS A COUCH,
AND IT IS PRONOUCED 'ZED' NOT 'ZEE', 'ZED'!
CANADA IS THE SECOND LARGEST LANDMASS!
THE FIRST NATION OF HOCKEY!
AND THE BEST PART OF NORTH AMERICA!
MY NAME IS JOE!
AND I AM CANADIAN!
Foster's "I believe" ad:
I don't have a kangaroo for a pet
I don't wrestle with crocodiles And I don't wear a cork hat
I fight wars but never start wars I would rather make peace
I can wear my country's flag with pride
I am a rock I am the ocean I am the island continent
My neighbours are the Smiths, the Wilson's, the Santerellis,
the De Costis, the Wong's and the Jakamarras
I play football without a helmet
I like beetroot on my hamburger
I ride in the front seat of the taxi
I believe it's a prawn not a shrimp
I believe the world is round and down under is on top
I believe Australia is the best address on Earth
And Australians brew the best beer.
Of course, the REAL Aussie ad would be:
I ate my pet Kangaroo
I am sh**t scared of crocodiles And I wear a baseball cap
I love star wars And the wookie is my favourite
I would rather get pissed
And watch someone else carry the country's flag with pride
I like to rock to Billy Ocean
I am blind to my incoherance
My neighbours are the Smith's, the Wilson's, the Wogs, the Lebs,
the Ching-Chong's and the Abo's
I watch football with a tinnie
And have never played badminton-but I know we'll win gold.
I take the beetroot off my hamburgers...
And throw Macca's pickles on windows
I do runners from taxis
I believe the world is flat And Australia is f******g miles away from anywhere
I believe Australia is the best address on earth
And Australians brew the best beer
And that's why we never touch Fosters...
We export that sh*t.
Personally, I must admit, I prefer the Canadian version :( Although the second Aussie version is better then that.
Platypus:
wow, this was successful...
Hatman 🍁:
Wow, I didnt know the Aussies had a version. Did you steal the idea?
Platypus:
I yhink we were first, but if we did steal it we did a sh**te job of it, eh?
Hatman 🍁:
Quote from: hughento on July 12, 2005, 02:57:37 AM
I yhink we were first, but if we did steal it we did a sh**te job of it, eh?
According to this, WE were first
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/I_am_Canadian
Personally, I like the Quebecois version though:
I'm not unemployed, or smuggling cigarette [sic] across the border.
I don't eat Pepsi and Mae Wests for breakfast.
I don't watch the hockey game doin' it doggy style.
And non, I don't know Claude, Manon or François in Abitibi - Témiscamingue;
but I'm sure dey all 'ave nice teeth.
I smoke in church.
I speak Québécois and Joual; not French or h'English [sic];
and I pronounce it 'turd', not 'third'.
And eating french fries with cheese makes sense, mon esti;
I believe in distinct society – as long as someone else pays for it.
I believe in language police, not equal rights.
And, calice, I believe that "Club Super Sexe" is an appropriate place for my wife and me to celebrate our anniversaire!
What da hell, she goes on at ten, anyway!
In Québec, the Stanley Cup actually comes round more often than Halley's Comet.
I can get beer at the dépanneur, not at the convenience store.
And maybe I can't turn right on a red light, but, tabarnac, I can go right through it!
Because Québec is the world's largest producer of maple syrup, the 'ome of Céline Dion and Roch Voisine;
The land where everybody is shackin' up, and the legal drinking age is just a suggestion.
Je m'appelle Guy - and I am not Canadian. (Mautadit tabarnac esti...)
Merci salut la visite!
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