New Jersey is Schneider Country

[HomestarSB9]

NOTICE: This timeline is a serious insight into a Dan Schneider presidential run. This is not made out of malice, or to totally ignore any unintelligent discussion. This is made purely as a timeline, a serious timeline.

July 12, 2019



Former television producer Dan Schneider announced a presidential run for the Democratic nomination Schneider stated that the decision to leave Nickelodeon was to form a presidential run against Donald Trump. Schneider stated "The violence in this country ignited by the President is unacceptable. I will be tough on reducing the crime rate in this country, I support the death penalty and life-sentencing, absolutely. If I'm elected then I will really 'make America great again'"

[HomestarSB9]

July 16, 2019



Former New Jersey Senator Bob Menendez announced his run for the Democratic Party's nomination for president. Senator Menendez, who was the sole Democrat defeated in the 2018 midterms, stated that despite the "frivolous" allegations of bribery, that he will run. He stated that "we have two other people [referring to Donald Trump and supposedly Dan Schneider] who actually have done the things that I've been wrongly accused for, and they think that they can put their cronies on a court and put me in jail instead of them, they favor criminals; a value that sends a message embracing corruption in this country. If I'm elected, I will work to end corruption in this great nation."

DEMOCRATIC NOMINATION POLLING:
Dan Schneider: 49%
Bob Menendez: 31%

[HomestarSB9]

July 19, 2019



Stormy Daniels's lawyer Michael Avenatti announces his bid for the Democratic presidential nomination. He addressed a crowd in Davenport, Iowa. He shouted that "Donald Trump, Dan Schneider, and Bob Menendez have all run this country into a direction that favors sexual exploitation and bribery. I, as an attorney, have worked consistently all my life to fight our great nation against political crime, and as president, I will give instant criminal sentences to Donald Trump, Dan Schneider, Bob Menendez, and any of their kind."

DEMOCRATIC NOMINATION POLLING:
Dan Schneider: 39%
Bob Menendez: 31%
Michael Avenatti: 27%

[HomestarSB9]

Wait, the sole democrat? Does that mean we have senators Wilson and Trauner, and a 435-0 house?

Oops I meant re-election.

[HomestarSB9]

August 11, 2019




Conspiracy theorist Alex Jones announced a run for the Republican presidential nomination Jones stated that "Donald Trump has upset several of us by not taking down North Korea, not pardoning Roy Moore, who's completely innocent by the way and the allegations were set up by the Democrats and the Clinton Foundation, keeping liberal Robert Mueller alive, and worst of all, saying that both sides were wrong in the Charolettesville riot. If I'm elected president, I will be vigilant in releasing the truth, releasing the documents that the JFK assassination was a ploy by the libtards to increase their gains for the next election, that Obama was a former Osama doppelganger, and that the Clinton Foundation killed Seth Rich."

REPUBLICAN NOMINATION POLLING
Donald Trump: 76%
Alex Jones: 22%

[HomestarSB9]

August 18, 2019

GOV. STEFANOWSKI ENDORSES ALEX JONES



Connecticut governor Bob Stefanowski, endorsed Alex Jones as opposed to President Trump. The newly elected governor explained that "I believe Mr. Jones will restore truth to America, after four years of the President hiding truths behind closed doors. Doesn't the president realizes that he's protecting the Clintons by keeping the truth behind Pizzagate and Seth Rich behind closed doors?"

SEN. MANCHIN ENDORSES BOB MENENDEZ



West Virginia Senator Joe Manchin endorsed Bob Menendez. Manchin stated that "Bob is my friend, and I truly believe in the anti-corruption message that he carries for America. I'd be thrilled to vote for Bob in 2020."

GOV. HUBBELL ENDORSES MICHAEL AVENATTI



Governor Fred Hubbell of Iowa, a crucial state in the primaries, endorsed Michael Avenatti. The governor stated that "Mike has defended women who are rightfully speaking out against the President and his Supreme Court justice. Mike is an American hero for standing up for women in this country, and I'd be proud to support him in 2020."

GOV. MURPHY ENDORSES DAN SCHNEIDER



Governor Phil Murphy, in a shocking move, endorsed Dan Schneider. The New Jersey governor, widely expected to endorse fellow New Jersey politician Bob Menendez, stated that "Dan is truly going to be tough on settling the problems with the riots and violence that face America everyday. Although I do appreciate the anti-corruption message of my friend Bob, I believe that he's in too much trouble to win, if he can't even win in New Jersey, I'm sorry Bob, but my endorsement goes to Dan."

[HomestarSB9]

SHAPIRO DECLINES PRESIDENTIAL RUN, ENDORSES TRUMP



Conservative political commentator Ben Shapiro declined a run for President. Stating "I'm satisfied with the President, and don't want to challenge him."

RACHEL MADDOW ANNOUNCES REPUBLICAN PRIMARY RUN



Television host Rachel Maddow announced her intentions to primary President Trump. She stated that "I have to do something to save the party of Lincoln and restore it to what it once was. If the party continues to pander to the alt-right, I don't see a bright future for this great party."

REPUBLICAN NOMINATION POLLING
Donald Trump - 73%
Alex Jones - 21%
Rachel Maddow - 5%

[HomestarSB9]

August 26, 2019

REP. VAN DREW ENDORSES DAN SCHNEIDER



New Jersey representative Jeff Van Drew endorsed Dan Schneider, the first-term New Jersey representative stated that "Dan Schneider is a true centrist, and really shows the direction that moderate Democrats, such as myself, want this great party to go."

DEMOCRATIC NOMINATION POLLING: NEW JERSEY
Dan Schneider: 53%
Bob Menendez: 29%
Michael Avenatti: 18%

SCHNEIDER ADDRESSES CROWD IN ANNAPOLIS



Presidential candidate Dan Schneider held a rally in Annapolis, Maryland today; alongside former Maryland Governor Martin O'Malley. "I'm proud to be addressing this wonderful crowd, in this wonderful state, with a wonderful friend, Mr. O'Malley," Schneider started, "I will work tirelessly to reverse the tragedy and conflict facing our nations schools, especially in the state of Maryland, what has the President done, moreover what has anyone done to help that school with the dead baby in the bathroom? Have you even heard about it? And what has anyone done to help that poor kid who was raped in that bathroom? Nothing. If I'm elected president, I will work to give compensation to any victims of such heinous acts, especially if they are children."

[HomestarSB9]

September 12, 2019

RUSS FEINGOLD APPEARS WITH MICHAEL AVENATTI ON CAMPAIGN TRAIL IN IOWA



Russ Feingold spoke a rally for Democratic presidential candidate Michael Avenatti. Feingold stated that "Mr. Avenatti has pushed for women's rights for years, against President Trump, against Justice Kavanaugh, and hopefully, for America. It's still a shame that people don't believe the gender gap is real, I'll tell you."

At the same rally, Mr. James Holton, a twenty-five year old computer software developer asked Mr. Avenatti about the Reddit forum /r/incels, and detailed of the misogynistic happenings and what he would do about these matters if he were elected president. Mr. Avenatti responded "I'll make shutting down outlets that glorify violence against women, misogyny, racism, and other horrific ideals a priority under my administration."

DEMOCRATIC NOMINATION POLLING: IOWA
Michael Avenatti: 44%
Bob Menendez: 29%
Dan Schneider: 23%

STEVE KING ENDORSES ALEX JONES



At a Republican gathering in Sioux City, Iowa; the area's lawmaker, Steve King endorsed Alex Jones. King stated that he had "admired Alex Jones and InfoWars for many years." King further said that "Mr. Jones is correct in stating that Donald Trump is alienating his base by keeping documents about Pizzagate, Seth Rich, the JFK assassination, the birth certificate, and many other documents of importance. I hope the great people of Iowa will select Mr. Jones as this great party's presidential nominee."

REPUBLICAN NOMINATION POLLING: IOWA
Rachel Maddow: 41%
Donald Trump: 39%
Alex Jones: 17%

[HomestarSB9]

January 29, 2020 - February 2, 2020

IOWA CAUCUS: CAMPAIGN WRAP

As the Iowa caucus is nearing, the candidates have made their final appearances through out the state.

Democratic candidate Bob Menendez delivered a speech in Council Bluffs, Iowa; alongside Senate hopeful, former Governor Chet Culver in the speech, Menendez stated his support for same-sex marriage. "The court case regarding that cake shop...in Colorado, was a horrible ruling, absolutely awful. I'll work to make sure that it is reversed when I'm president."

President Donald Trump campaigned in Iowa on his successes, "I put a conservative voice on the Supreme Court, I brought back millions of jobs, I started the wall, what don't people love about me? I've done everything for these people and what do I get?" Alongside the president was Iowa Senator Joni Ernst.

Michael Avenatti made an appearance in Des Moines with Governor Fred Hubbell. While on the trail, Avenatti blasted Trump's earlier appearance, stating "The president put somebody who had done inappropriate things to three women on the Supreme Court, hasn't brought back any jobs; in fact the economy has worsened with Toys R' Us down the toilet, and hasn't taken any action on any of his campaign promises. I'll stick to my promises, in fact, I'll give you one now, I promise that I will bring back jobs, expand women's rights and respect, and service the country."

Rachel Maddow appeared at a theater in Cedar Rapids alongside former Governor Kim Reynolds, Maddow campaigned on a pro-civil liberties platform, "The government shouldn't tell you how to live your life or what you do with it. Life is too short for the government who runs this country to tell you how to be and what to be. To the citizens of Cedar Rapids, I hope to have your votes in the caucus!"

Alex Jones held a rally at a tavern in Sioux City. Many white-nationalists were in attendance, Steve King was at Jones's side. Jones reiterated his previous statement of "I don't like 'em puttin' chemicals in the water that turn the frickin' frogs gay." Jones stated that "I absolutely 100% still stand by the claim, and will personally take down any opposition to straight, heterosexual frogs. It's disgusting that the libtards of this country want to turn animals to their own alien agenda."

Dan Schneider campaigned at the Jordan Creek Town Center in West Des Moines Schneider campaigned on the promise of the protection of life after a certain point. "I'm pro-choice, but I do believe there ought to be a certain cut-off point for being able to abort a fetus. Maybe a month before the baby is to be born, because the baby's already mostly developed and to abort it then could be a serious risk to the mother, regardless of the clinic's credentials." Soon afterwards, Schneider was at a McDonald's Play Place in Des Moines, performing meet-and-greets with children.

FINAL POLLING RESULTS BY CONGRESSIONAL DISTRICT (DEM)



FINAL POLLING RESULTS BY CONGRESSIONAL DISTRICT (REP)

[HomestarSB9]

IOWA CAUCUS RETURNS

Anderson Cooper: Good evening I'm Anderson Cooper, now tonight is probably the most important night; as it will determine who our president will be for the next four years, or who the won't be will be.

It is 8:12 PM, and our first results from Iowa have come in, the areas counted are suburban or rural counties accounting for only 2% of the state's population.

DEMOCRATS (2% in)



Michael Avenatti - 49.94%
Bob Menendez - 33.73%
Dan Schneider - 12.33%

It appears that Michael Avenatti has a large lead in Iowa at the current moment, carrying suburban Poweshiek County, and tech-savvy Wapello County, with Bob Menendez carrying rural Guthrie County, and Dan Schneider not currently carrying any, if Avenatti is to win this contest; keeping Wapello County in the playing field is key.

REPUBLICANS (2% in)



Rachel Maddow - 35.23%
Donald Trump - 33.21%
Alex Jones - 31.56%

In a state that he won by nearly 10% in 2016; President Trump is slightly behind Rachel Maddow in Iowa, likely due to Wapello County's larger population. The President is leading narrowly in Poweshiek County, and Alex Jones is dwarfing both candidates in rural Guthrie County. Unlike the Democratic caucus, which Avenatti is widely expected to win; the Iowa caucus will be very close for the Republicans.

[HomestarSB9]

The time is now 8:33 PM; and more results from Iowa have come in.

DEMOCRATS (6%)



Michael Avenatti: 36.53%
Bob Menendez: 33.19%
Dan Schneider: 30.28%

Michael Avenatti is still in the lead; however the lead is narrowing. Bob Menendez is currently leading in Marion County; a county with over 33,000 residents; if Avenatti can't recover from the loss, which is currently within a margin of 0.026%, it will be an upset. Dan Schneider is leading in two central Iowa counties, Sac and Emmet; and tied with Bob Menendez in Ida County.

REPUBLICANS (6%)



Donald Trump: 34.73%
Rachel Maddow: 34.01%
Alex Jones: 31.26%

The president has been able to capture a narrow lead in the state, as he currently is keeping edges in Tama and Poweshiek counties, and carrying a wider majority in Cedar County. Alex Jones is leading by very large margins in two more rural counties, Ida and Sac. Emmet County is currently tied between the President and Rachel Maddow.

[HomestarSB9]

It is now 9:01 PM; and more results have come in from Iowa.

DEMOCRATS (9%)



Michael Avenatti: 38.11%
Bob Menendez: 31.27%
Dan Schneider: 30.62%

Michael Avenatti has expanded on his lead in Iowa, gaining populous Clinton County and flipping Marion County by a slim twelve votes, with 93% of county precincts reporting. Bob Menendez is still performing in second place, but his lead is narrowing; as he is carrying rural Humboldt County by one vote with 69% of county precincts reporting. Menendez's only substantial gain was Webster County, home of Fort Dodge.

REPUBLICANS (9%)



Donald Trump: 40.11%
Rachel Maddow: 37.60%
Alex Jones: 22.29%

The president has built his lead in Iowa substantially by gaining over 50% of the vote in Clinton County. Rachel Maddow is still showing a strong second place showing. Alex Jones's lead has dwindled, only gaining small rural counties near Sioux City.

[HomestarSB9]

I don't understand this.

Would you care to elaborate?

[HomestarSB9]

It is now 9:31pm; and we now have 17% of precincts reporting.

DEMOCRATS (17%)



Michael Avenatti: 40.81%
Bob Menendez: 33.31%
Dan Schneider: 25.88%

As the Des Moines suburbs come in from Polk, the higher the likelihood is Michael Avenatti's chances of winning the caucus becomes. However, Avenatti may soon face a difficult challenger, as suburban Boone County is divided between Bob Menendez and Michael Avenatti with 25% of precincts in.

REPUBLICANS (17%)



Donald Trump: 34.43%
Rachel Maddow: 34.41%
Alex Jones: 31.16%

President Trump is holding a nail bitingly narrow lead against Rachel Maddow. Pundits predicted that once the city of Des Moines comes in, the lead will flip to Maddow.

[HomestarSB9]

IOWA CAUCUSES (100% REPORTING)



DEMOCRATIC
Michael Avenatti: 41.23%
Bob Menendez: 36.54%
Dan Schneider: 23.14%

REPUBLICAN



Donald Trump: 34.67%
Rachel Maddow: 33.01%
Alex Jones: 32.32%

Michael Avenatti and President Trump have won the Democratic and Republican caucuses respectively.

STATE ENDORSEMENTS

Gov. Fred Hubbell (Michael Avenatti)
Rep. Dave Loebsack (Michael Avenatti)
Fmr. Sen. Tom Harkin (Bob Menendez)
Fmr. Gov. Chet Culver (Bob Menendez)
Fmr. Rep. Jim Leach (Rachel Maddow)
Fmr. Gov. Kim Reynolds (Rachel Maddow)
Sen. Joni Ernst (Donald Trump)
Rep. Steve King (Alex Jones)

Dan Schneider answers why he lost Iowa.

At a campaign rally at the Residence Inn by Marriott in Conway, New Hampshire; presidential candidate Dan Schneider stated that, "We knew that in the primary that Iowa was going to go to Michael Avenatti, he and Menendez had the entire Democratic establishment in the state behind them. So I decided that Iowa wasn't the place myself be humiliated, so I only visited the state once only because a campaign adviser asked me."

[HomestarSB9]

It’s gonna take some time to realize.

Actually it’s “realign” not realize

What's to realign?

[HomestarSB9]

DELEGATE MAP

Michael Avenatti: 13 delegates
Bob Menendez: 10 delegates
Dan Schneider: 6 delegates

Donald Trump: 11 delegates
Rachel Maddow: 10 delegates
Alex Jones: 8 delegates


DAN SCHNEIDER RELEASES AD IN NEW HAMPSHIRE



This is North Korean leader Kim Jong-Un; he has launched several nuclear missiles directed towards the United States, South Korea, and Japan. He has also threatened several of our other allies to do the same. The North Korean army is the largest in the world. Guess who has befriended this well-known enemy?



That's right, President Donald Trump has reached out and befriended North Korean government; as well as he stopped strongly supporting one of our most valuable allies, Israel; North Korea has threatened our soil more than attend to their population. What if Donald Trump decides to stop supplying food to our rural grocery stores?



That's why if I am elected president, I will win the war for Israel by surrounding Palestine by military tanks, and I will remain tough in defending our great nation by increasing our military budget.



I'm Dan Schneider and I approve this message.

[HomestarSB9]

What....

You talking about this guy?

[HomestarSB9]

DEMOCRATIC CANDIDATES DEBATE



The Democratic candidates, Dan Schneider, Bob Menendez, and Michael Avenatti debated at the Black Bear Lodge in Waterville Valley, New Hampshire. The following are highlights.

Anderson Cooper: Mr. Schneider, do you believe that Mr. Menendez and Mr. Avenatti pose threats to the United States military?

Dan Schneider: Absolutely Anderson, Bob Menendez will not stay strong protecting Israel or ourselves, Mr. Avenatti on the other hand doesn't even want the military to exist, and believes the ways to deal with world leaders such as Assad is to race them, NASCAR style. This isn't Mario Kart, Mr. Avenatti, you can't stop Assad or Maduro like that. The only way to stop them is to deploy troops, something my opponents will never do.

Anderson Cooper: Mr. Avenatti, what will you do to balance the budget?

Michael Avenatti: Anderson, I will increase taxes on the rich and will not hesitate to send them to re-education camps if they do not pay; the poor and middle-class can have time to pay their taxes, and maybe, every eighth month, there will be a 12% decrease in taxes for them. My opponent, Mr. Schneider has who knows how much money from all the television programs he has done, how much of that money is going into taxes? Judging by how much he could be paying to silence people like Arianna Grande, Jamie Lynn Spears, and Amanda Bynes, I can predict that not a lot of money is going into his taxes.

Anderson Cooper: Mr. Schneider, regarding Mr. Menendez's refugee plan, what do you have to say?

Dan Schneider: Anderson, I've been a strong supporter of refugees entering our country, we need to provide shelter from the governments that set out to harm these people. However, I believe that Bob's plan is flawed, in the context that it doesn't cover the concern of bacterial warfare. Since Syria is already testing chemical weapons on its own citizens; who says that they can't move on to weaponized bacteria?

WHO WON?
Bob Menendez: 36%
Dan Schneider: 33%
Michael Avenatti: 31%

[HomestarSB9]

FEBRUARY 11, 2020

NEW HAMPSHIRE PRIMARY RETURNS (DEM)



Dan Schneider: 37.60%
Bob Menendez: 35.64%
Michael Avenatti: 26.76%

NEW HAMPSHIRE PRIMARY RETURNS (REP)



Alex Jones: 37.63%
Donald Trump: 37.00%
Rachel Maddow: 25.37%

Both in upsets, Dan Schneider and Alex Jones won their respective primaries in New Hampshire. Jones by a nail-bitingly 0.63% margin.

DELEGATE MAP

Michael Avenatti: 19 delegates
Bob Menendez: 18 delegates
Dan Schneider: 16 delegates

Donald Trump: 20 delegates
Alex Jones: 18 delegates
Rachel Maddow: 16 delegates

[HomestarSB9]

DAN SCHNEIDER CAMPAIGNS IN SEASIDE, FL



Presidential candidate Dan Schneider campaigned in Seaside, Florida; alongside him was Representative Debbie Wasserman Schultz.

"I-I believe that the federal budget is absolutely obscene, I bet anyone who knows a thing or two about this country knows that. But what has the President done to reduce that? The wall? Construction never even started! I'll-I'll tell you what I, President Schneider will do. But before I do so, I'll say this. White teenage girls living here in the Sun Belt bicker and complain about having to wear shoes in the summertime. So, here's my plan; stop selling foot-wear to white, teenage girls living in the Sun Belt during the summer to reduce the deficit. You may be saying 'Oh Mr Schneider, that violates some sort of constitutional amendment.' Do you have any idea how many amendments in the constitution are violated by President Trump?"

Due to a new law signed by Governor Gillum, Florida's presidential primary and Nevada's presidential primary will take place on the same day.

NEVADA GOP KEEPS TRUMP, MADDOW OFF PRIMARY BALLOT



Michael J. McDonald, chairman of the Nevada Republican Party stated that only Alex Jones will be allowed on the state's Republican primary ballot. He stated that "We, the Republicans of Nevada, want someone who is a real freedom fighter; and will not only beat the Demon-rats, but beat up the Demon-rats. Alex Jones is that man."

The Republican parties of Clarke County, Washoe County, and Carson City have already signed a pledge to defy the order, stating it "unconstitutional".

[HomestarSB9]

MENENDEZ BASHES SCHNEIDER'S FISCAL POLICY



This is Bob Menendez, he's attacking Dan Schneider's sense of humor for opening the door to child grooming and sexual abuse.



What Mr. Anti-Corruption Man won't tell you is why he lost re-election in a Democratic wave year, he was indicted for bribery charges made to benefit the business interests not even in New Jersey, but in Florida, in exchange for private flights and gifts. The investigation only ended after Menendez bribed the jury as well.



A vote for Dan Schneider is a vote against corruption that happens all too often in Washington.



I'm Dan Schneider, and I approve this message.

[HomestarSB9]

FEBRUARY 19, 2018

NEVADA & FLORIDA PRIMARY RESULTS

NEVADA DEMOCRATIC PRIMARY



Bob Menendez: 40.33%
Dan Schneider: 39.90%
Michael Avenatti: 19.77%

NEVADA REPUBLICAN PRIMARY



Alex Jones: 60.41%
Donald Trump: 30.64%
Rachel Maddow: 8.95%

FLORIDA DEMOCRATIC PRIMARY



Dan Schneider: 36.67%
Michael Avenatti: 31.97%
Bob Menendez: 31.36%

FLORIDA REPUBLICAN PRIMARY



Donald Trump: 37.81%
Alex Jones: 37.63%
Rachel Maddow: 24.56%

DELEGATE MAP

Dan Schneider: 124 delegates
Bob Menendez: 113 delegates
Michael Avenatti: 106 delegates

Alex Jones: 137 delegates
Donald Trump: 128 delegates
Michael Avenatti: 80 delegates

[HomestarSB9]

SCHNEIDER TO MENENDEZ AT DEBATE; "YOU LIE!"



During a debate at the Moncks Corner Inn; Dan Schneider interrupted the speaking time allotted to Bob Menendez.

Anderson Cooper: Senator, what are your thoughts on same sex marriage?

Bob Menendez: Well, I've always supported civil rights for gay people, I've voted for the repeal of Don't ask, don't tell; I've cosponsored the Respect for Marriage Act, and even going back; I opposed the Defense of Marriage Act, opposed Don't ask, don't tell-

Dan Schneider: You lie!

Dan Schneider: I would like to state that the last two statements that came out of the Senator's mouth are lies, he voted for the Defense of Marriage Act, and voted for Don't ask, don't tell;

Bob Menendez: Where are your sources? Where, are your sources?

Dan Schneider: He's also hired illegal interns who turned out to be registered sex offenders, and bribed an entire jury so he could keep his job.

Bob Menendez: Hey Dan, where did I support them Dan?

Dan Schneider: If you're going to criticize my rec-

Bob Menendez: Tell me when, tell me-

Jack Lew, head adviser to Dan Schneider as well as former White House Chief of Staff to President Obama, and Rob Renzetti, Chairman of the Schneider for President committee admitted to telling Dan Schneider to bring up the point of Menendez's support of DOMA and DADT, but not to go at him like he did.


"I'm shocked," said Lew, "I've never thought that Dan would go at Bob like that." When asked about South Carolina, Lew said that he "wasn't massively concerned."

ALEX JONES RELEASES AD IN SOUTH CAROLINA



This is pro-wrestling; a sport that requires two people to beat each other up. Doesn't that sound awesome?



Unfortunately, the libtard majority in Congress doesn't think so, they think it's "inhumane", yet eating babies on public property, taking away guns from innocent individuals, and letting two people of the same gender marry is.



If I'm elected president, I will decriminalize steroids so that true Americans can get as buff as they want to beat up the sissy libtards that run this country.



I'm Alex Jones, and I approve this message.