Attn Justices: Atlasia vs. Keystone Phil

[Peter]

What exactly are you suing for? I am not aware that you have been denied any rights at this time. All I have done is stated in the public domain that it is the belief of the moderators that you are in fact Keystone Phil and that we have evidence to support this. Whether the Atlasian authorities choose to act on this is up to them - I have been asked to communicate with the Attorney General, which I will endeavour to do soon. If the AG takes action in the form of a court case then I will respond to any requests of the court.

[Peter]

I need to give up drinking and then getting very little sleep before posting on the forum.

Lewis is correct - I completely misread the thread. I'll be in touch with Hashemite, though Lewis is correct on another point - person/entity suing (the plantiff), in this case, Atlasia, always comes first in a court case title. Defendant (whoever you decide to call it) comes second.

[Peter]

I'll just read this into evidence:

Dear Forum Members,

The game is over. Over the past couple of days, I have posed as "Jessica Walterstein," the "girlfriend" of "Michael" Naso as a joke poster. I was getting away with it, too. I recall only two members correctly guessing my true identity and I would have continued since one member didn't follow up on it. One of two problems is that the one individual that correctly guessed who I really am will probably follow up on it after he picked up on one of my clues. The other is the fact that word has been spreading like wildfire that I am not Naso but someone else, another former, controversial forum member. This is where I realized that I had to set the record straight.

A few days ago, one of the moderators incorrectly guessed my identity and contacted me via PM. An IP check was done and one of the strangest, yet oddly very convenient, mistakes in forum history occured. The IP was traced to a town that borders the hometown of one of our old members. It seemed like a slam dunk - no way could it be anyone but this person. Except it is not him. The funniest part was that this IP not only had the wrong town, it had the wrong state. I made the moderator aware of this and since he found the whole act amusing, he didn't act on it. The only problem is that others have picked up on the IP check and word has spread. Knowing that someone else could get blamed and get in "trouble," I decided to correct a few people and come clean about who I really am. Another issue is that having people think this is someone other than Naso while not correctly guessing who it is takes away from the fun. This wasn't the only issue though.

I believe two people hit the nail on the head concerning my identity and, as I stated earlier, one never followed up. The other, however, did. That person is Hughento. In one post, I spelled Oregon "Oregano," an inside joke shared between myself, Hugh and a few others after he lectured Americans on how to properly pronounce the word. He then contacted me via AIM. I tried to cover it up in a Facebook message but ultimately gave up.

I want to close with why I chose this "Jessica" character. A few months ago, Naso put on an act that he had a secret girlfriend by the name Jessica Walterstein. It become a running joke. For awhile now I have been wondering what forum life has been like. One night, I was so bored that I decided to make a comeback. I wanted to do so in an unconvential way so I asked for and received Naso's username and password and came back as our joke, Jessica Walterstein. I want to make clear that while it may be "wrong" to use someone else's account here, I did so with permission. I wasn't here to troll, I was here as a joke. Some people enjoyed it while others did not but regardless of whether it was amusing or not, it wasn't meant to be nasty. I enjoyed it while it last but the show has to end sometime.




And so, my friends, my truth is that I am a Pennsylvania Atlasian.






















Keystone Phil

[Peter]

Has the defendant been charged, received process?

[Peter]

Mideast Jury Selection Statute.

However, if the Court will allow me, this is a federal offence (because voter registration falls within the federal sphere), violating a federal statute, and therefore should be tried according to all relevant federal Law, including the federal Jury selection law.

Oh, its also worth seeing whether Keystone Phil will enter a guilty plea, thus avoiding the need for a jury trial.

[Peter]

I swear that I will well and truly try the matter in issue between the parties, and give a true verdict according to the law and evidence, so help me Dave.

[Peter]

Your Honour,

If a juror feels there has been an error of procedure or a violation of constitutional rights of the defendant, is it permissable to vote "Not Guilty" even if we feel the evidence presented is sufficient to convict the defendant?

[Peter]

Guilty