Simfan for Governor

[Simfan34]

Ewing, New Jersey, Northeast Region

Friends, fellow Northeasteners, how excited I am to see all of you here with me. I come here today to offer myself to you. I come here today to announce that I am making a stand- a stand for what is right. A stand for common-sense governance, where our government serves the people, and brings them forwards, up, out. A stand for decency, civility, and the values that we have cherished for ages. A stand for the people.

I come here today to announce I am running for the Northeast Assembly. The vacancy opened by the election of Nathan to the senate needs to be filled, and I, simply, would like to fill it. I would like to offer myself as not only a candidate of the RPP, but a candidate for all, to represent all.

For example, the Silly Party represents a wonderful tendency in our politics, that of transpartisanship and of openness, a desire and an ability to represent the unrepesented. That is admirable. I hope to work with the Silly Party throughout this campaign.

Together, will we progress. Together, we will win. Thank you.

Uoy knaht.

Niw lliw ew ,rehtegoT .ssergorp ew lliw ,rehtegoT .ngiapmac siht tuohguorht ytraP ylliS eht htiw krow ot epoh I .elbarimda si tahT .detnesepernu eht tneserper ot ytiliba dna erised a ,ssennepo fo dna noisserppo-non fo taht ,scitilop ruo ni ycnednet lufrednow a stneserper ytraP ylliS eht ,elpmaxe rof.

Lla tneserper ot ,lla rof etadidnac a dna ,PPR eht fo etadidnac a ylno ton sa flesym reffo ot ekil dluow I .ti llif ot ekil dluow ,ylpmis ,I dna ,dellif eb ot sdeen etanes eht ot nahtaN fo noitcele eht yb denepo ycnacav ehT .ylbmessA tsaehtroN eht rof gninnur ma I ecnuonna ot yadot ereh emoc I.

Elpoep eht rof dnats A .sega rof dehsirehc evah taht seulav eht dna ,ytilivic ,ycneced rof dnats A .tuo pu ,sdrawrof meht sgnirb dna ,elpoep eht sevres tnemnrevog]i/[ ruo]i[ erehw ,ecnanrevog esnes-nommoc rof dnats A .thgir si tahw rof dnats a -dnats a gnikam ma I taht ecnuonna ot yadot ereh emoc I .uoy ot flesym reffo ot yadot ereh emoc I .em htiw ereh uoy fo lla ees ot ma I deticxe woh ,srenetsaehtroN wollef ,sdneirf.

[Simfan34]

Thank you both. I'll be taking questions now.

Won snoitseuq gnikat eb ll'I. Htob uoy knaht.

[Simfan34]

Everyone should vote for you, if for no other reason then you took the time and effort to type all of that backwards.

I am about to make a major step in the proliferation of the Sillese language.

http://www.imasuper.com/511/technology/tool-to-spell-backwards/

I use it for the longer sentences, but shorter stuff I do myself.

Vote for me because I'm honest.

[Simfan34]

Here is my official campaign logo!

Thank you, Yelnoc. Your endorsement means much to me. I hope to build support from fellow members of the Silly Party.

Ytrap Yllis eht fo srebmem wollef morf troppus dliub ot epoh I. Em ot hcum snaem tnemesrodne ruoy. Conley, uoy knaht.

[Simfan34]

Thank you both. I'll be taking questions now.

Won snoitseuq gnikat eb ll'I. Htob uoy knaht.

[Simfan34]

Sdrawkcab epyt uoy esuaceb uoy troppus t'nac I.

Naisalta na rof taht naht esrow gnihtyna eb dluoc ereht taht em ot mees t'nseod ti. Efil fo yaw dna erutluc Naisalta ruo ot desoppo fleseno gniralced ot nika, Naisalta-nu dna citoirtap-nu s'ti; smodeerf Naisalta cisab ruo gnisoppo ot tnuomatnat si gnipyt sdrawkcab gnisoppo? Eerga uoy fo lla t'nod. Ylsuoires nekat eb t'nac noinipo sih taht em ot suoivbo ytterp smees ti.

Siht ekil ti ssimssid ot hsiloof si ti. Tnatropmi si ti gnisu os, srekaeps egaugnal Esellis eht ot tuo hcaer tsum eW. Taerg dnal ruo sekam taht noisserpxe eerf eht fo ngis a si egaugnal Esellis eht fo esir eht. Eerga I!

[Simfan34]

I'm glad to put forth some ideas:

-A more competitive Northeast. Our great cities- Boston, New York, Philadelphia, Pittsburgh- can and should be world centers for commerce and growth. Thus the regional government should promote the construction and relocation of companies to our region, and especially our cities.

-I would propose and support policies such as research and development credits, manufacturing deductions, and tax holidays for companies that innovate, produce, and add value to our communities by designing and producing the technologies of the future, here in our great region. We should even consider direct support to companies like Bell Labs that innovate.

-We should promote excellence in education by focusing on the core areas- reading, writing, mathematics, and the sciences- to produce the most educated and prepared people of the future- our children

[Simfan34]

I consider myself a conservative, which assumes a center-right form.

[Simfan34]

I consider myself a conservative, which assumes a center-right form.

Good, good... (strokes chin) I think yeh shall be endorsed...

Here, have these Coney Island hot dogs!

[Simfan34]

I strongly oppose the Music Piracy Decriminalization Act of 2011, which is currently is being debated by the Assembly. In my mind, it is wholly unfair to permit, without consequence, the upload and download of music without payment or permission from the relevant authorities. For most artists, producing their music is their livelihood, and to deprive them of that means is simply wrong. Revenues in the American music industry per capita are down 65% percent from their peak, and in absolute terms, sales have fallen from $14.6 billion in 1999 to a projected $9.2 billion in 2013.

The proposed legislation will not help stem this trend. Compounding its foolishness are the provisions that prohibit any person filing a suit in any case regarding these unauthorized downloads and mandating the repayment of fines issued. Such provisions may also very well be unconstitutional.

Simply put, such downloading constitutes a form of theft, and I cannot support any law that legalizes theft.

[Simfan34]

I support the proposed Removing That Stupid Parental Advisory Sticker From CDs Act of 2011.

[Simfan34]

Where do you stand on the proposed 'Absolutely Silly Act'?

It has my full support.

I also note with pleasure the failure of the Music Piracy Decriminalization Act of 2011.  I would also like to inform my supporters that the election will be on the 1st of December.

[Simfan34]

You've run an active campaign and deserve my support.  Endorsed.

Many, many thanks.

In the interests of personal disclosure and general information, here is my "biography".

Simfan34 was born in Binghamton, New York to a Liberian immigrant father and an African-American mother. He attended the public schools in the area and played varsity soccer in high school, as well as playing trumpet in the All-State Orchestra and regional Jazz Band. He graduated as the salutatorian of his class.

He attended Cornell University in Ithaca, New York, and graduated with a degree in civil engineering. After college, he joined the Bethlehem Shipbuilding Coporation as a naval architectsand eventually became a corporate Vice-President. After that company's closure he founded the Philadelphia Maritime and Naval Company (PMNC), which built, for example, a number of ships for the U.S. Coast Guard, oil and gas tankers, large container ships, and two Staten Island ferries. PMNC was purchased by the STX Corporation of North Korea in 2008.

Since then, Simfan34 has served as a consultant for various companies in the shipbuilding industry, and an advocate for that industry, promoting reform and growth-productive policies. He was appointed Lieutenant-Governor of the Northeast Region by Governor Winfield in July 2011.

Simfan34 lives at 163 East 64th Street in New York City with his wife of 17 years, Emily, and his three children, Alexandra, Alastair, and Edward, aged 15, 12, and 9, respectively. In his spare time, he enjoys sailing, bicycle-riding, hiking, book- and map-collecting, and is an avid theatre and opera enthusiast. He is a long-time player of the piano, trumpet, and guitar, and is additionally fluent in French, Spanish, and Portuguese.

He absolutely refuses to eat a hot dog without relish and will refuse to touch a pizza less than half an inch thick.

See, I'm such a normal, human person!

[Simfan34]

I support the proposed Amendment to the regional constitution, the Residential Officeholder Act of 2011. It is crucial our officeholders be resident in our region- how else could they possibly be expected to represent us or understand our concerns?

[Simfan34]

I support the proposed Vacancy Filling Act. Then we wouldn't have to wait so long.

Election starts in two days, folks!

[Simfan34]

Simfan34 campaign rally, XL Arena, Hartford, Connecticut

Now, my friends, I know the polls may be a bit tight at this point in our election, but let me assure you, let me assure you all, we shall come out on top. Now we’ve fought, and I’ve put forth my positions, my platform, and what I intend to accomplish in my service to you all. You know where I stand. Meanwhile, my opponent has done none of that- indeed, he is not formally my opponent! Where does he stand? What does he support? What are his opinions on the pressing issues affecting our great region? We don’t know! The voters know that, and that is why we will win.

We’ve been successful in attracting support from across party lines: the Silly Party, the NCP, the JCP, and of course, my RPP. We’ve put forth a comprehensive platform; we’ve presented ideas that appeal to people across our political spectrum. We all stand here today because of the solutions I’ve offered, that can, and do, attract Northeasterners of all shades. That is why we will win.

So, my friends, let me tell you this: keep the sprit! Stay strong in your support! Do not waver; do not bend to the transient thoughts of the few! Get out and vote, if you have not! We will fight- and WE-WILL-BE-RIGHT!

Now, for our surprise speaker...

[Simfan34]

Nathan, Cincinnatus, thank you. You have my heartfelt gratitude.

You see, my friends, this is what I'm talking about. These two former opponents, who stand on across the aisle, are able to come together in support for us. The platform we've put forth appeals to all, as I said. That is why we will win.

We have the momentum!

[Simfan34]

My friends, we need only three more votes. Let's make victory a reality. With only 40.9% turnout so far, this should be no tall order.

Victory is near!

[Simfan34]

I want to say thank you. Thank you all for the support you all have shown me during this campaign. Thank you for your kind words, your help, your presence. I would especially like those who crossed party lines to support my candidacy- a true sign of our transpartisan appeal.

Thank you especially, 20RP12 and Mr. Speaker, for your well-wishes. They are heartfelt and deeply appreciated by me.

Now, turning towards the future. Some of you may know I filed to run in the upcoming General Election. As of now, that bid is on hold. I will be taking soundings on what direction I will take regarding the election, but I right now to not expect to contest it all.

But I cannot thank you all enough. Thank you for standing with me. Even if we did not win, we have made a difference. Thank you.

[Simfan34]

After discussion with many individuals, I have decided to reverse my position and resume my bid for Northeast Assemblyman.

[Simfan34]

On Liberty
Simfan34

In Atlasia, we enjoy a myriad of rights and freedoms as envisioned by our Founding Fathers and embedded in our constitution. These liberties are what make our country great. It is in the principles of my party, the RPP, to defend, extend, and maintain these liberties, to reduce excessive government and replace it with those rights. I stand with them, and I stand for them.

We, indeed, must temper a desire for liberty with concerns for respect, security, tolerance, and common sense. But we cannot go too far. Otherwise, we shall lose them. If elected, I shall give my all to ensure that does not happen.

[Simfan34]

So are you defending and extending liberty, or tempering it with respect, security, and "common sense"?

I plan to extend it. I belive such extensions have to be tempered with "respect, security, and common sense", but I'd like to see them extended.

[Simfan34]

I would like to express my great dissatisfaction with not being listed on the ballot for the ongoing Northeastern election, despite being one of the first to declare. This is not right, and I am currently considering various means of recourse.

[Simfan34]

Well let me begin by thanking you all for the variety of opinions that you've all provided me with today, for they have been greatly useful in my considerations for what I do next.

As of now, I would prefer if the current election booth be closed and a re-vote be held; with my exclusion and Dallasfan65's inclusion, I think that there has been a significant distortion of the results. This is something I would like to leave to the judgement of our Governor. I do not want to sue our region. Nor will any action I take be tied to the results of the election: I do not want to be a "sore loser". This error was, by nature, unintentional, greatly unfair, yes, but unintentional nonetheless. A lawsuit, in my opinion, constitute an overreaction.

As for my intent, I will admit the language in my declaration was obscure and perhaps incorrect in the terms of formal declarations. However, I do feel my intent was clear:

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The special election, of course, was the by-election to fill Nathan's seat due to his election to the Senate. This was for the Northeast Assembly. I was not elected, but I do not think that changed the meaning of what I was saying: had I intended to run for an office in February, I would have made that clear and specified which office I would be seeking. In this election, there is only one type of office being contested- Northeast Assemblyman.  Also, it would have not been nonsensical to refer to the February election as "upcoming" when a December election was closer. The Atlasian Heritage dictionary defines "upcoming" as "occurring soon; forthcoming", so I think that in the context of the word's definition, the only election I could have been referring to is this one. In addition, as some have pointed out, my campaigning  would also be a sign of my intent.

I apologize for not coming forth sooner, as I have been otherwise occupied and simply did not have time to check the voting booth, but specifically pertaining to Napoleon's comment, I do not know how I could have remarked on my placement on the ballot before the booth was opened- one usually doesn't expect these sorts of things to happen, much less be able to preempt them.

Thank you for your regards.

[Simfan34]

I didn't come here to hold hands and blow kisses.

I'm not sure what to make of this. Are you saying you've come to attack me?